Why was she speaking slowly? Why wasn't she cheering anymore? Where did the smile go? Was Forrest THAT pathetic to even UTTER Ella's name?!

"Yes, Fern, the captain," he said as hopelessness started to rise in himself. He opened his mouth to ask WHICH part of it was hard to understand when she told him to wait--only for proving Cutty that she was maybe REALLY a little slow.

"Y'see, that's the thing," he started with a sad, sad face. "Alec cheated on her. I know he did. But she's too blind to see it. And--and," he looked into her eyes to get her to see he was serious, "she deserves better! She's just so perfect and he's cheating on her with that French girl." He grunted. How could Alec?! "I would never cheat on her..."

"WHAT!?!?"

"Omigosh, omigosh, omigosh!" Fern wringed her hands, then she pulled at her hair, then she covered her face, then she peaked through her fingers at Forrest, "Are you sure!? What did you see!? What did the French girl look like!? Did she have great hair and look evil!?" Fern uncovered her face and reached for Forrest's hands, staring back just as intently, "This is important! I think I KNOW her, Forrest! AND WHAT IF SHE IMPERIUSED ALEC INTO CHEATING ON ELLA?!"

This was a total possibility. In the latest Candy Cobbsweb book, Candy's ex, Mike, had imperiused her best friend, Jeannine, into dating him to make Candy jealous.

And Fern wouldn't put casting Unforgivable Curses past that evil French girl she had met on the fifth floor.

...what was Fern doing?

Forrest EYED her and... ooooh! She was overreacting! He looked relieved, because SURELY that would mean she was MORE THAN EVER willing to help him show Ella--

Seriously, with low this level of IQ, how could Fern even LIVE?

"I didn't see," he said, on edge, as his patience drew nearer to its end, "I read it in Aparecium. She didn't imperius anyone. Alec. Cheated. On. Ella." CLEAR ALREADY?!

"Will you help me get Ella or what?"

Fern opened her mouth after Forrest spoke, ready to ask what he heard then, if he didn't see anything, but all she got out was a "Wha-," before he kept on talking.

Oh. The Gossip Magazine. Fern's bulging eyes relaxed as soon as she heard, 'Aparecium,' and she was had only just placed a relieved hand over her heart when FORREST SAID THE MOST TERRIBLE THING.

"GET ELLA!?" The first year exclaimed in horror, hand still over her heart, but now for a completely different reason. "FORREST! FORREST!"

"NO!"

Fern was going to be sick. She couldn't even look at Forrest. And she wasn't going to ask why. She didn't want to know.

YES, that was his name! Forrest KNEW that!

No herself! Why wasn't she looking at him?

"Why not?" He was confused. He didn't understand why. He thought those were what Fern had always wanted: love and teenager status. Should he remind her he was THIRTEEN?

Fern's head snapped up at Forrest's question, and she stared at him for a moment in open-mouthed disbelief and before yelling, "How can you even ask me that question?!" Fern waved her hands around angrily, "It's becaaaause Ella'S TRUE. LOVE. IS. ALEC! SHE'S going to MARRY ALEC, and they're going to LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER!"

"WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO RUIN TRUE LOVE, FORREST!? THAT'S WHAT BAD GUY'S DO! AND YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE A HUFFLEPUFF!" And everyone knew Hufflepuff was the good guy house. The other houses, they had their bad guys, but not Hufflepuff.

"AND BESIDES! ELLA'S NOT YOUR TRUE LOVE, ANYWAY! BRISTOL IS!!!" WHY COULDN'T FORREST GRASP THIS FACT!? It wasn't that hard of a concept!

Because Forrest was really confus--

...

Throughout her long yelling--seriously, Fern should consider singing because never once did her voice break despite the shrillness; Forrest's face went anger red, mortification purple and indignation blue. He didn't even know how he should feel. He was even more confused than ever! So there he was, looking like a complete idiot with his mouth slightly open and his right index finger pointing upwards.

He ought to speak, right? Bummer.

"Bristol, is, NOT, my, love." One. "I love Ella." Two. "I'm not a bad guy." Three. "Alec is." Four.

"But yeah. They will probably marry. They go on vacation together." And there, he looked depressed and desperate. Wasn't Fern at least PITY him?!

Each statement of Forrest was followed by an attempted interjection, but Fern wasn't able to get in anything but a cut-off shriek before Forrest kept on talking. She had so much to say, and she wanted Forrest to just sit down and be quiet and listen.

But then he started to look sad, and Fern hated it when Forrest looked sad, because he looked like a cruppy, and Fern loved cruppies, and this was a problem. So even though the 11-year-old had a lot of things to yell about, she toned it down and instead said very matter-of-factly, "Of course they will marry. That's because it's true love, and true love always wins in the end."

Then she perked up, and with a big smile, nodded to herself, "That's how I know you and Bristol are going to live happily-ever-after too."

That only made Forrest's shoulders slump more. He was so heartbroken and sad that he didn't even argue with Fern about Bristol. He had a few words about Bristol as she seemed to always be VERY busy, but he kept them to himself. He wasn't as good as her about love matters, but he was sure that wasn't how people fell in true love with each other.

He slowly sat down as he refused to look at her. "We could have been happy together..." he muttered to himself. They could have tended an elephant. Adopted, even! He was sure Alec didn't have such dreams. He probably only cared about his own seeking career and showing off with Ella's captaincy whereas Forrest would have TRULY CARED about her.

"Cutty thinks I shouldn't listen to you," he said as an after-thought as his eyes were still on the floor. He was too depressed to care about her expression, really.

Not hearing what Forrest muttered because she was too busy imagining his future romance with Bristol, Fern plopped down next to her fellow Hufflepuff with a happy sigh. She could just picture Forrest and Bristol together. Together forever. They would hold hands and take picnics by the great lakes with sandwiches cut in the shape of hearts and write F + B on the frosted windows in the winter, and of course they would tell Fern all about it, and it would be so romantic.

Soooo romantic.

Fern sighed again, and she opened her mouth to tell Forrest just how wonderful it would be when he said that name, Cutty, and made Fern so angry she wanted to SCREAM.

Which she did. Jumping to her feet with a shriek, Fern stomped her foot and shouted, "CUTHBERT!? CUTHBERT IS THE MOST AWFUL BOY EVER! AND-" Then two things dawned on the 11-year-old. First, that Cuthbert had been talking about her behind her back! HOW DARE HE BE TALKING ABOUT HER WHEN SHE WASN'T THERE!? And second, and even more importantly, that FORREST HAD BEEN TALKING BEHIND FERN'S BACK WITH CUTHBERT!

Fern couldn't believe it. First Forrest was "too cool" to do facials with her on his birthday. Then he started hanging out with Tora, and he began plotting to end Ella and Alec's true love. AND NOW he was HANGING OUT WITH CUTHBERT!?

"FORREST CHARLETON, YOU ARE DEAD TO ME!" She cried, and she scrambled into the common room, determined to never speak to him again. Even - EVEN! - if he and Bristol finally got together. Fern didn't want to hear about it.

Forrest JUMPED upon hearing the shrill voice and forgot all about Ella for a moment. He stared at her with big eyes and an open mouth. He even leaned back unconsciously to put more space between his precious body and her angry one. She scared him. He would never admit it to anyone, but she DID scare him and currently--

"WHAT!"

He shot to his feet but she was already gone. "FINE. HAVE FUN ALONE, LOSER!"

Yeah, LOSER. It was one of her jealousy fits--he was pretty accostumed to them--but he wasn't going to talk to her this time EVER AGAIN even if--even if it would cost him a future with Ella. SHE was dead to HIM, and he was going to make sure she just LOST all her friends!

Breathing there furiously for a minute, he cursed under his breath--he didn't know what it meant but it looked cool on his brother--he turned around and decided to head to the Quidditch Pitch with high hopes of seeing Ella.