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sweetpinkpixie 03-24-2012 06:01 PM

Okay, so Lewis had been mostly right earlier, but now he was sort of way off target and her head was shaking back and forth to confirm this. "Y-You're wrong..." she whispered. Which is why all this was so difficult because she felt like she was being torn into two pieces. Her hand that had been gripping the pendant around her neck dropped to her side and her lips pouted a little. The only difference that there might be would be the level of the liking, but that was getting far too technical than the Gryffindor wanted to think about.

She already felt as though she had taken all her OWLs and NEWTs in one sitting.

Her arm swung by her side and her hand scrunched up into a feeble fist as it began to hit her hip, her eyes sifting their focus from him to the floor for a moment before returning back to where they had been for the past several minutes. Kurumi felt the most vulnerable she had ever felt. Well, not entirely true. She had felt more so down at the lake when Lewis had been holding her. But...she had also felt safe there. It was that feeling that she was yearning for...and was perhaps why her body moved the tiniest bit closer. It was a small enough movement to probably go unnoticed - and it did in Kurumi's case.

"I...see you as more than just...a friend..."

There. Now she had said it too. Unless he had meant something entirely different, in which case she now looked like a fool and had cheeks the color of ripe peaches.

Lislchen 03-25-2012 08:37 PM

He was...wrong? Wrong how? What was she talking about? That their way of liking each other WAS the same? But...no, just no. That couldn't be it. Some part of his brain acknowledged that if he hadn't been that close to her in the first place, he wouldn't even have understood what she'd said, seeing as her whisper was barely audible. This only drew attention to the fact that they were extremely close to each other, so close even that he could feel her breath on his face. This realiziation caused his mouth to twitch a little, and his cheeks to redden some more.

There was absolutely no way he was going to take a step back, though.

Averting his gaze when she did, Lewis watched her arm swinging back and forth for a moment. But what if that was exactly what she had meant? That she liked him too...and not just normal like. Somehow that possibility just wouldn't go into Lewis' head, though. It was way more complicated to deal with both of their feelings than just with his so he was going to take the easy way out and just assume that wasn't what she was talking about. Yes, that would wo-

And there went that plan down the drain. Once again. Lewis looked up sharply at her next words, catching her moving hand by the wrist at the same time. There, he had finally broken the spell of being this close without actually touching. Meeting her gaze a variety of emotions played across his face, which were also quite clearly reflected in his green eyes. Suprise...Happiness...Confusion...Denial...Pain. Take your pick, it was probably there for at least a few seconds. She'd said it. The words he'd somehow most hoped for but at the same time feared the most as well.

"Kurumi..." He started, blinking a couple of times, his eyes never leaving hers however. Reaching out with his right hand - the one not holding on to Kurumi's - he moved to tug a strand of dark hair back out of her face. Instead of lowering it again though, he just left it there, sort of cupping her cheek with it. He was still unable to form any coherent sentences somehow so he just settled with nodding slowly, unsure of how to proceed.

sweetpinkpixie 03-26-2012 05:54 AM

omg this took me so long to do o___O
 
Kurumi wasn't breathing. At least, it felt like she wasn't as she stood there having what really could only be explained as an out of body experience. Why was she doing this? Feeling these things? It wasn't logical. Not practical. Utterly insane. But that wasn't the Gryffindor side of her speaking, it was something else. Would she be here, this close to Lewis, saying these things if she hadn't been an emotional train wreck all term? Maybe yes maybe no. What if Jonathan were still here and hadn't, as the knot in her stomach and breaking of her heart feared, forgotten her? She knew the answer to that and her mind was screaming it at her. She wouldn't, plain and simple.

Yet, here she was. The most broken she had ever been and the most vulnerable and who was there to help pick her up? Lewis. Her heart raced and, what parts weren't broken yet, felt like they were being torn in two and painfully slow. Foolishly, she locked eyes with Lewis again, getting lost in their emerald color yet finding herself wishing that there were a pair of chocolate ones looking back at her. Despite this, she felt happy...knowing that he cared for her. It made her feel...

Her eyes widened and the flush on her cheeks deepened when he took hold of her hand and ceased all movement. As if that hadn't taken her breath away already, in the next moment his hand was brushing her hair and then...it was on her cheek, sending a shiver down her spine as she searched his face, his eyes his hair for some sort of clue as to what he was feeling. Only she found it impossible to read as no single emotion seemed to stay there for longer than an instant. Kurumi herself had no idea what she was feeling. She knew what she SHOULD be doing. She should be taking a step back. Should be telling him yes...but... Shouldn't be bringing herself just a little bit closer. But she wasn't. She was doing everything that logic and part of her heart was telling her not to do.

The truth was...she needed him. It was selfish but true.

When he said her name, her eyes refocused again on his, flickering briefly on his lips that were moving closer before moving back to his eyes and sort of leaning her head into his hand. "Lewis...I..." She felt dizzy...almost claustrophobic...but she wasn't moving. Instead her eyes fluttered shut and she stayed exactly how she was.

Lislchen 03-26-2012 11:05 AM

Lewis held completely still, just searching her violet eyes for...yes, what was he looking for actually? Guidance? Maybe. Seeing as his own brain decided now was a good time to have a siesta apparently, hence going completely blank. So he was going to have trust Kurumi's judgement on what to do and what not to do. Although it seemed as if she wasn't too sure about any of that either. The feeling of wrong just seemed to hover around them somehow but neither of them acted on it by breaking their gaze or stepping away.

It felt like some kind of invisible force held them in place.

And there it was. The sign he'd been looking for. He inhaled a little shakily as her gaze briefly dropped down to his lips and he resisted the urge to chew on them. His thumb had started to trail random patterns on the palm of her hand absently but stopped once her eyes were back on his and she said his name. The tension around them and inside of him had reached its peak and something told him that the only way to get rid of it was to lean in even further.

Which was what he ended up doing. He really didn't want her to finish the sentence she'd started, since he had the bad feeling that it was going to be something along the lines of "I can't.". And this was the last thing he wanted to hear right now. Even though there was a part of him which knew she was right. That didn't change the fact that he didn't want to hear it right now. He was at the point of no return. Or actually he was pretty sure he - or they rather - had reached that a few minutes ago already.

When she closed her eyes, his dropped down to her lips for a second and before he could change his mind, Lewis closed the last bit of distance between them and brushed his lips against hers softly. A million and one thoughts and emotions flashed through his mind but all he could do right now was concentrate on how her lips felt against his. Right now he didn't even care if or that it was wrong. It just felt way too right to be anything but.

sweetpinkpixie 03-26-2012 12:04 PM

Eternity seemed to pass as the Gryffindor tried to collect herself. She needed to be honest, entirely honest, not only with herself but with Lewis - and by some extension Jonathan. She searched her mind first, trying to put aside logic as best she could without totally ignoring it and tried to make sense of the broken pieces of her heart that were slowly being mended by the caresses of Lewis thumb on the palm of her hand. That was making it harder to concentrate actually...but she also didn't want him to stop.

And then there was the way he was looking at her. I made her feel uncomfortable...while also made her feel wonderful. Still...there were another pair of eyes that she desperately wanted to have looking down at her and those eyes, unfortunately, were not green.

Eyes shut, Kurumi was able to eliminate one of the distractions, because she knew looking into Lewis' eyes she wasn't going to be able to think straight. They were captivating and made her feel like thousands of butterflies were in her stomach. She needed to finish this sentence. Needed to somehow get out that while she really liked Lewis. That she could picture them walking down the halls together hand in hand...she just...

But all thought processes were interrupted and her eyes flew open for just a brief moment as his lips found hers, silencing any sort of protest she may have had. She needed to push him away. This had to be wrong. No. It WAS wrong. But why did a small part of her feel like it was so right? Perhaps that wasn't the right word. It was different. That is really what it was. Different. The feeling of suffocating became stronger and her hand squeezed Lewis' for stabilization. She needed to push him away. NOW. But something in her was preventing her from doing so. Her vision blurred and her eyes slowly shut tight again as her own lips moved in unison with his - kissing him softly back - and her body moved closer to his. The hand that wasn't being held in his moved as if of its own accord and rested on the nape of his neck for a brief moment before slowly moving up to tangle her fingers delicately in his hair. Her own hair reacted to all this as hidden and suppressed emotions came to the surface. Her usual ebony hair faded slightly and took on a pink hue. As she did, a single tear ran down the cheek Lewis did not currently have his hand on.

That seemed to have done it.

Realizing what she was doing, Kurumi stopped and lowered her head so that Lewis' lips were now against her forehead. Her breathing was heavy, almost panting, as she tried to catch her breath. Part of her wanted to look up again, continue the kiss, but that was the selfish side of her that was looking for immediate comfort. Immediate affection. And she just...couldn't do that. She had let her selfish instincts go too far already. Her other hand reached up for the one cupping her face and she slowly pulled it away. "Lewis..." she whispered again, still not bringing her face back up to look at his. She could still feel his lips on hers, like they were on fire, and the Gryffindor did not know what to make of that. "Lewis...."

It really was now or never.

If she waited any longer, she was going to look back up at him and be the one to initiate the kiss this time. So, head still down, Kurumi took the tiniest of steps away from the Hufflepuff, which really wasn't much of a step at all since she found herself completely incapable of any sort of movement right now. "I'm....I'm... I'm..." The words were choking her. Making her feel dizzy. Confused. Disgusted with herself. At least it was able to drown out the voice that was telling her to continue. "...sorry..."

She liked you, Lewis Rasting. More than she should have allowed herself to, and that would not change. She knew she would be happy with you. That she would feel safe, comforted, and like she belonged. Even though she had said sorry, her pink hair revealed her feelings and it was taking all her will power to keep them at bay.

The thing was...she was falling, or already had, for someone else.

Lislchen 03-26-2012 02:57 PM

Lewis didn't move at first, his lips barely in contact with hers, just savoring the moment of being so close to her. Feeling her breath on his face. His lips on hers. Her cheek in his hand. And her hand in his other. It felt like everything around them had just stopped moving the moment he had finally leaned in. He closed his eyes for a moment and with his other senses heightened, Lewis couldn't help but sigh softly against her lips at how amazing this felt. Was this really happening?

Or rather, was Kurumi actually allowing this to happen?

No, she was doing much more actually. The squeeze of his hand had only been the start of a series of reactions from her, starting with her moving closer to him while kissing him back. Returning the squeeze of her hand, Lewis leaned in further, pressing his lips against hers a little more. It felt as if she couldn't be too close to him right now, so he moved even closer to her so that their bodies were touching. When he felt her hand at the back of his neck and then in his hair, a shiver ran down his spine and he held completely still for a moment, just hoping she wouldn't stop doing what she was doing. Because it just felt too...incredible for words.

And while it had definitely lasted longer than expected, it still ended way too soon.

He instinctively opened his eyes and leaned forward a little when her lips left his, already missing their touch. But they were gone. The moment was over. And all he got was to sort of rest his head on top of hers. His hand was removed from her face but he didn't even have the strength to do anything about it or move any other part of his body. When she moved back just the tiniest bit, all he wanted to do right now was reach out and pull her close again but somehow he'd lost all control over his body. He shut his eyes tightly again, not wanting to think about anything. He just wanted for all of it to go away. Far far away.

But of course nothing ever just happened. Breathing in the scent of her hair, he didn't even hear her saying his name twice. He was somewhere far away where there was no pain or sadness. Somewhere where everything just worked out the way you wanted it to. And in this wonderful place his heart didn't feel like it had just been literally torn into small pieces. Which was why he really didn't want to leave it but instead just stay there forever.

He came crashing back down to reality when he heard Kurumi apologize softly. Opening his eyes again, he just stared at the wall opposite of him for a moment, taking in the words. He'd known that it wouldn't last. That it wouldn't be right. That it wouldn't work out. That still didn't make it hurt any less, though. Finally getting out of his stupor, Lewis moved his hands slowly so he could pull her into a hug, not willing to let go of her ever that quickly. "I...know." He said, his voice breaking a little and he closed his mouth again, not really able to say anything more right now.

sweetpinkpixie 03-26-2012 03:54 PM

Kurumi managed to wiggle one of her hands free and it found a semi permanent resting place on her lips. What...had just happened? No, that wasn't the right question to be asking. What has she just allowed to happen? How could she not have noticed this? How could she not only betray herself...but Jonathan? He was someone who she cared for, a lot. Someone she had been bottling up a confession for since the holidays and had wanted to tell him when they were back in school, only things hadn't worked out that way. She didn't deserve him. Not when her loyalties wavered like they just had.

Kurumi's senses were at their breaking point, so she was very aware that Lewis' head was resting on her own and that her other hand was still being held. His uneven breath through her hair caused her to shut her eyes tight again as it served as a reminder for what she had just done. She needed to pull away more. She needed to put distance between herself and Lewis before something else happened.

Only that idea went out with the kneazle when he pulled her in closer. She could almost feel a sense of urgency in his embrace, but it only made her more uncomfortable. She was supposed to be moving away, not getting closer, and she whimpered softly into his chest because that is where she had been pressed against. Her lips were still burning, and her hand continued to touch them as if they were hot coals or some kind of cursed object. Only Kurumi couldn't see them as either of those. What had just happened was not a curse or something evil...it was really quite the opposite.

STOP. She needed to stop thinking like that.Kurumi somewhat came to her senses when Lewis whispered a response, almost directly in her ear, and his warm breath and voice sent a shiver down her spin. He knew? If he really did...he wouldn't be putting her in this situation right now. She needed to go. Both hands free now, Kurumi moved them upwards, placing them both on his chest and gently pushed, hoping that the lack of strength was enough of a signal to Lewis that they needed to stop this. Her eyes were back on his again, a very bad idea, and her teeth chewed on her bottom lip. Her eyes foolishly glanced at his lips again - more in disbelief that that had just happened - and went back to his face.

"Lewis..." she whimpered again, almost in a pleading tone. Her vision was getting blurry again and her knees wobbly. What was she supposed to do now? How was she supposed to tell him what had happened? What was going to happen to them? Kurumi blinked nervously, a few more tears trickling down her cheeks. Her voice was gone and her small frame was trembling as she pushed the palms of her hands against his chest again in a pathetic attempt to distance herself, only it may not have come across that way due to her serious lack of any sort of force. "Lewis...we..." can't do this.

Lislchen 03-26-2012 10:21 PM

If Lewis hadn't known that this wrong before he definitely knew after her reaction to him pulling her closer. Though, he'd known from the start that it was. Somehow he'd just for one moment believed some kind of foolish idea that HE was wrong and that THIS wasn't. But of course...it was. How could it not be? Still, it wasn't like he'd forced himself upon her or anything, he'd been willing to just let it go. It had been her who'd initiated the conversation which had led up to...this. Not that any of that made this any less wrong.

He was still not ready to let go of her just yet.

When he felt the pressure of her hands on his chest, he knew it was over. It had been over a moment ago already. Actually, no, it had never even started, had it? He was just clinging on to some kind of imaginary connection between them, and was now almost as desperately clinging on to Kurumi. He had to let go. Literally and figuratively. He hesitated for a moment, though - his heart threatening to jump out of his throat - and instead leaned back just a little so he could look at her.

Meeting her gaze for a second, Lewis swallowed hard while trying to rid his face and eyes of any sort of emotion. Which proved to be quite hard considering but somehow he managed to hide them somewhat until they were only visible in the depths of his eyes anymore. And Kurumi wouldn't get a chance to look at them too thoroughly, since it was right then that the Hufflepuff moved his hands away from her and reached up to literally pluck her hands off his chest. Letting go of them again quite suddenly, he just hovered on the spot for a second before taking a step back. The moment he'd dropped her hands, he immediately felt the feeling of loneliness creep up on him but he did his best to ignore it for now.

Even though she left her sentence open, Lewis somehow knew what she'd been about to say. What she'd probably been about to say when he'd kissed her too. That she couldn't. That this was wrong. He took a few more hastened steps backwards until his back hit the wall which was where he stayed for now, just looking at her. Sort of hugging himself, he closed his eyes for a moment as if he were in actual physical pain while trying to compose himself again. He only opened his eyes again once his breathing had returned to a normal pace and with great effort he focused them back on Kurumi.

Hang on, was her hair...was it...pink? Or pinkish anyway. How had he not noticed this before? And since it was a lot easier to concentrate on her hair than meeting her gaze, Lewis ended up staring at her bangs, glad to have some sort of distraction.

sweetpinkpixie 03-27-2012 02:30 AM

When Lewis leaned back to look at her, Kurumi's emotions betrayed her again and she rose ever so slightly on her tip toes to try and bring them closer, to to lower herself back down and bite down on her lip. What had they just started? Kurumi's mind was swimming now. There really was no going back now, knowing what had happened...knowing how they both felt... Kurumi wished that this could just be erased from her memory, from his, and they could go back to being awkward friends. However, she didn't really want that. Not really. She wanted to remember this moment...

She whimpered as his hands were on hers, his warm touch wonderful and frightening at the same time. What came next literally knocked the wind out of her and she stumbled forward as her hands dropped to her sides and Lewis took the appropriate steps backwards, whimpering again as his body hit the wall behind him. What wasn't already broken shattered when she saw him hug himself, and she ended up mirroring his actions, wrapping her arms around herself to try and somewhat emulate the feeling of security and bliss she had been in moments ago - before the truth of how wrong their actions came crashing down on both of them.

She had hurt him. Lewis. Not only that, but she had hurt Jonathan. Her worst fear right now selfishly, was that she may have just lost both of them. It was this thought that caused her to take a step forward, her right hand somewhat reaching for him, but she pulled herself back before she completed the movement. "Lewis..." she whimpered again. His name seemed to be the only thing she was capable of saying right now. The silence was deafening, and she felt her ears ringing and her heart threatened to jump out of her chest. "Please...say...something...." Anything. Because the look of pain in his eyes and longing in her heart was making her want to go over to him again.

She didn't even make the connection that he was looking at her hair. To her, she thought that he was looking at the last place his lips had been on her, and her fingers traced over her own lips.

Lislchen 03-27-2012 10:17 AM

Getting a little bit of distance between them had definitely been a good idea, even though he really missed their closeness already. Especially since he somehow got the feeling that this had been the last time they would ever be this close. If only there was some way that he could've hold on to the moment just a little bit longer. But he knew that the moment when it felt right to let her go would never come so it had been a now or never sort of situation.

Still, some part of him wished that he hadn't stepped away from her.

It just seemed so easy to walk back over to her and pull her close again. Only it wasn't. Maybe it was easy but not right, definitely not right. So instead, Lewis just continued to hug himself, wincing barely audibly when she did the same, his heart breaking some more to see her like that. What had they done? What had they done to their friendship? What had HE done? The coldness of the wall behind him helped him to clear his mind somewhat, sort out his thoughts...but also caused his chest to tighten some more when he actually got the chance to think about what all of this meant. To her. To him. To them. They'd just ruined everything, hadn't they?

He couldn't help but inhale sharply when somehow took a half-step towards him. The logical thing to do was for him to take one back so they would keep their distance but instead, it was him who instinctively took a small step forward. He knew it was wrong, he knew he shouldn't but somehow he felt like a moth drawn to the light. A look of hurt flashed across his face for a moment, as if it was actually painful to him to be a step closer to her again. Lewis actually shivered when she said his name again, the way she said it making his chest feel so tight, it amost felt like he was suffocating.

Please say something...

Only what? His gaze was averted down to her lips when she reached up to touch them, and he swallowed subconsciously. He wanted to be the one to touch those lips, to feel them against his fingers, against his own lips, without the least bit of remorse or guilt. Swallowing again he shook his head slowly, more to himself to get these kinds of thoughts out of his mind before focusing his gaze back onto her face. "Your-" His mouth twitching a little he sucked on his lower lip for a moment before ending his sentence with "-hair." Yes, not the best thing to say after...this but he didn't dare say anything else right now.

sweetpinkpixie 03-27-2012 10:57 AM

Kurumi whimpered, again, when she saw that Lewis' movements matched hers. Merlin...please don't let him get closer... she wasn't going to be able to keep her guard up, not like this. She could already feel her nails slightly digging into her arms through her robes as the tension that had been, then wasn't, and now was back intensified. She didn't want him to look at her like that. Eyes that were vacant of joy. They had been, before they had crossed a line that really shouldn't have been crossed, and for a moment Kurumi allowed herself to feel no regrets. And this temporary lapse in judgement moved her closer.

Tears were still finding their way down her face, but they were not really tears of sadness. They were tears of confusion. Of the unknown. Of not knowing how to move forward from this because there was no way she couldn't look back.

Your...

Her shoulder hunched and her small frame almost appeared to be smaller as her mind raced to fill in the rest of his sentence. She had been expecting him to begin whatever sentence was coming with 'I,' so the fact that he had his focus on her took her breath away. Her eyes, that had not exactly been on his, now were and her hand that wasn't on her lips twitched slightly at her side.

What came next had been no where near what she had been expecting and her eyes widened and flashed with a look of terror. The hand that had been on her lips immediately pulled a lock of her hair in front of her eyes, the look in them intensifying more. "Oh no..." she whispered, glancing back at him with a look of humiliation now on her face. Before he had time to really react, Kurumi threw the hood of her robes up over her head, covering her face and turned her back to him. Things were just going from bad to worse, and now Lewis knew that she was different. Maybe this would make it easier? Her being abnormal and all. Even with everyone telling her that it was nothing to be ashamed of, she just couldn't believe that. Her own mother, who lay dying in some hospital right now, didn't even want her freak of a daughter with her because of what she had just shown Lewis she could do.

She whimpered again, biting down on her lip to hold back more tears, and attempted to take a step forward, away from Lewis and towards the exit, but she ended up stumbling and startled several owls that were perched nearby. The letters that had been sticking out of her robe's pockets fluttered to the floor, but those went unnoticed for now as the Gryffindor stood there, her body shaking like a flutterby bush.

Lislchen 03-27-2012 12:28 PM

The look of sheer terror in her tear-filled eyes was enough to make his own fill up with concern for her. What was going on? This didn't have anything to do with what had just happened, and his thoughts weren't - for the first time in the last few minutes - on that either. His brain was working at full speed, trying to figure out what had caused her quite intense reaction to his words. Her hair...hadn't been pink before had it? No. So it had changed. Only when...and how?

Oh.

A dawning look of realization crept upon his face as he realized that there was basically only one way her hair could've changed color like that, without using her wand. But...Lewis looked back up just in time to see her throw him a an embarrassed look - which only confused him more - before throwing the hood of her robes over her head and turning away from him. That did it. The fact that she apparently didn't even trust or like him enough to allow him to see her for who she really was, hurt even more than her telling him to stop. At least he'd KNOWN beforehand that something was wrong then.

Lewis' arms were now pressing against his own abdomen like a wounded soldier as he continued to just stare at Kurumi's back for a moment. It felt like if he moved his hands, he would...disintegrate or something. Despite what was going on inside him, he still couldn't help but feel awful for Kurumi. It ate him up to see her like this. So, after a moment of hesitation in which he fought down the wall his own defense mechanisms had just erected a few seconds ago, Lewis moved back towards her until he was standing right behind her.

Not too close though but still close enough.

Chewing on his lips he stared intently at the letters on the floor for a moment, not really seeing them however. What was he doing? But he couldn't stop himself. Kurumi was clearly upset and he just couldn't stand idly by and not at least try and help her. "Kurumi..." He said quietly to get her attention as he moved his gaze back up to the back of her head and raised a hand to tug at the end of her hood softly. Not too hard to pull it off her head but hard enough for her to hopefully notice and see what he was trying to tell her.

sweetpinkpixie 03-27-2012 01:00 PM

It was a good thing that Kurumi's back was turned to Lewis right now, because the sight of him looking as if his heart had been forcefully taken from his chest would have made her do something that she would look back and regret. She could only let her guard down that one time.

That one time...

Her hand founds its way back to her lips as her index finger pressed lightly against it.

That one time...
She needed to get out of there. Now. She didn't want Lewis to see her like this. Out of control. Vulnerable. Being that side of her. What was she saying? She had already been two out of three of those things. So, three strikes and you're out? Kurumi leaned forward a bit, wanting to go with her flight instinct, but something stopped her.

Before he even spoke or reached for her hood she knew he was standing right behind her and her entire body froze. Why was he doing this? Making it harder for her to do what she knew was the right thing? Her breathing became uneven and she slowly turned her head to glance over her shoulder as his hand pulled on her hood. Their eyes met, and she wiggled her head ever so slightly to allow him to finish what he had started: remove the hood from over her head. There she was. Nothing to hide. No more secrets. Completely vulnerable.

She licked her lips, trying to find her voice now that her throat had gone completely dry as she continued to look at Lewis. Her violet eyes shimmered and told a story of pain, fear, and a yearning to be accepted...but afraid of rejection. She stood there, motionless and with unblinking eyes, waiting for him to say something.

Or...maybe she would just run...

Lislchen 03-27-2012 01:47 PM

Lewis was too engrossed in his own thoughts to notice how Kurumi's body went rigid when he walked up behind her. This wasn't one of those wrong things, right? This wasn't about them or what had happened only a few moments earlier. No, this was about her, her being upset. And seeing as he was her friend - he WAS still her friend, wasn't he? - he had to make sure she was going to be alright.

And make sure that she knew there was absolutely nothing she had to hide from him.

The rather conflicting thought about them still being friends made him swallow hard, and broke his concentration on what he was doing. Which was not think about her as in him and her. Now that he had started focusing on what was actually happening again, he noticed how uneven Kurumi's breathing had gotten. He had only a second to dwell on this fact however as it was right then that she turned her head and met his gaze.

Now it was his turn to freeze - with his hand still on her hood - just staring right back into her eyes. A look of shock flashed across them for a moment, shock at what he was doing probably. But it was too late to turn back now. Plus this wasn't about them. He told himself that in his head again and again, like a mantra, as he broke their gaze to shift it to her hair once he'd slowly completely removed the hood again. It took all his will power to stop himself from reaching out and touching her hair, which still had that slight pinkish hue.

Not moving - even though he should! - Lewis locked eyes with her again, biting his lip when she licked hers. No, that hadn't gone by unnoticed. How could it. But then again, this wasn't about them. Or it kind of was but not about them them. "Why did you turn away?" He finally asked softly, not quite able to keep the hurt from his voice at this fact.

sweetpinkpixie 03-27-2012 02:20 PM

She felt exposed like a field mouse being thrown into a large space with noting but white walls and nowhere to hide. Her breathing became a little heavier as her heart beat increased, but this time not because of the close proximity they had once again found themselves in. How had that happened, by the way? Kurumi's eyes searched his, peering deeply into them, trying to find some sort of sign that he thought what she assumed everyone did about her being different, but there was not even the slightest glimmer of that. Instead she found something that made her chest heave and ache even more.

Her hair, still very pink in hue, fell over her face as she slightly turned her head and managed to block her from his gaze. His question stung, his tone or hurt resonating strongly within her and her feeling of shame grew even more. She just couldn't stop hurting him it seemed. "I-I-I...didn't what you to see..." she whispered. She never wanted anyone to see and usually had a good handle on these changes...or HAD a good handle on them until this term. "I'm...a-a-ashamed of this. What I can do...It makes me different..." Despite those close to her telling her otherwise. Treyen, Salander, Lexi, Josh, Selina, .... Jonathan. Her eyes shut tight, but Lewis probably couldn't see this because her hair was partly hiding her face now. "A...monstrosity..." That is one word she used to be called...and it was moments like these, everything since she had learned about her mother, all the emotional blows and confusion, that made her believe it.

Her hands fell to her sides now, hanging there limply and defenselessly and her pinky finger ever so slightly brushed against his hand that was resting by his side. That small touch was enough to send a jolt of electricity though the Gryffindor, but she dared not look at him. Not yet.

Lislchen 03-27-2012 03:53 PM

Lewis was somewhat glad when Kurumi broke their eye contact by turning her head back. She'd been way too close and his thoughts had started to drift off to dangerous places once again. As had his eyes when she'd drawn attention to her lips by running her tongue over them, probably instinctively. This was bad, and he was supposed to take a step back again.

Only he didn't. Not even when she turned away.

Or maybe BECAUSE she turned away. It was way safer that way. For...both of them. When she started talking he just couldn't resist anymore and reached up to take a strand of her now pink-ish hair between his finger softly. Not really realizing WHAT it was he was actually doing, Lewis leaned forward a little so he could examine it more closely. Huh. Only the color had changed. The hair itself seemed to be the same - as far as he could tell anyway. Which was actually pretty awesome.

It was only then that he realized that she'd actually finally answered his question, and when he did he quickly let go of her hair again, blushing a little. "But...different is good." That's what his mum used to say anyway. Or still did sometimes actually. He couldn't quite believing that this was the reason she was upset. There was nothing wrong with her, nothing. She was perfect. A monstrosity?! Lewis actually gasped and gaped at her for a moment there, not really believe what he'd just heard her say. "No...you couldn't be. Why would you think that?" He was actually really tempted to make her turn back around to him but that might just...result in other things happening, so he resisted the urge.

Lewis glanced down at their hands sharply when hers touched his for just a brief second. His skin shouldn't tingle where it had come into contact with hers but it still did. Swallowing he continued to stare at her hand for a moment longer before reaching out and giving it a soft and what he hoped to be a reassuring squeeze. He then let go of it again and took a step back, away from her.

sweetpinkpixie 03-27-2012 10:36 PM

Kurumi's eyes fluttered shut again at his touch, and she was thankful that it was her hair that he had gone for and not her face. She was pretty sure that the wall she was building up right now would have come crashing right back down if he had done that. Still, this did not prevent a shiver from running down her spine - not matter how subtle the toying with her hair it was. She needed to go...and stop telling herself that she needed to and just do it before...

Her head snapped back up now, hair away from her face so that she could now see his clearly without her hair blocking the way. What Lewis was saying was not unlike things she had heard before, but it still felt different, and her body turned to face him now. Clearly, she wasn't listening to herself and all the sirens going off in her head. She bit her lower lip again and breathed heavily, unsure how she was going to get this next bit of information out without...

"Because it has always been that way..." she replied, all though processes shutting down. "I-I-I can't even be myself at home...m-m-mother..." It still hurt to think about her mother in this way, knowing that this wasn't going to change. That in the end...her mother still thought of what she was as a disappointment and perhaps even that word she had uttered earlier. "S-She won't even look at me unless I have brown colored contacts in..." And it was with those words that she turned her gaze down words, almost as if she was ashamed of their color - which she was, at times.

Her eyes widened, but did not look up just yet, when his hand took his again and gave it a small squeeze. He let go far too quickly, however, and despite what she kept telling herself not to do her body acted on pure impulse and reached out for his only a split second before he took a step back. "Don't..." go...

Lislchen 03-28-2012 09:33 AM

And the Kurumi did something really really...inconsiderate. She turned around fully so she was facing him again. This was bad. Lewis swallowed hard a couple of times, and inhaled sharply through his nose while he let his arms hang loosely by his sides. This wasn't about them...this wasn't about them...this was only about making her feel better. This had nothing to do with what had just happened a couple of minutes earlier. So there was absolutely no reason to think about that right now.

But some part of him told him that there was never ever going to be a moment when he WASN'T going to think about that.

Chewing on his lower lip, he intentionally ran his teeth over the sore part of it too, to keep his thoughts from drifting off again. He put his hands into his pockets after catching himself sort of reaching out to her a couple of times, and just settled with listening to her. Her mother had a problem with her being different? Her own mother? But no, that wasn't right. That couldn't be true. All he wanted to do was reach out and hug her close to him right now, to make all the pain go away, to make her feel accepted.

When she actually lowered her gaze as if she was ashamed of her eye color, Lewis just couldn't stop himself anymore and reached out to cup her chin softly, making her look back up at him. He even opened his mouth to say something but the sadness in those violet eyes just left him speechless, so he closed it again, dropping his hand from her face at the same time. Anything he said right now would probably come out wrong and make things worse. And he really didn't want that.

So instead, he was going to get some distance between them again. Or that had been the plan at least. But then Kurumi reached for his hand, stopping him from taking that very important step back, leaving him sort of swaying on the spot for a moment. He glanced back and forth between her hand on his and her face a couple of times before letting his green eyes rest on hers. His mouth was twitching a little and he just stared at her for a moment, a little...dumbfounded by her reaction. "What...?" What did she want from him?

sweetpinkpixie 03-28-2012 10:03 AM

Her gaze was still facing the ground, so she missed most of Lewis' movements towards her to hold her or touch her. She sort of wished he just would, but she wasn't going to say that out loud and she was afraid to look up at him because she knew that her eyes were going to convey that to him. If he was able to show some restraint, then that was a good thing, yes? Then why did it feel like she was lying to herself?

She felt like she was expected to explain more, but words just were not coming anymore. That, and she really didn't want to talk more about this. It would only complicate things and make the longing that they both were still clearly feeling stronger, so it was better that she remained silent...staring at the ground.

And then, Lewis did something inconsiderate. She gasped softly when his hand found her face again, cupping it and pulling it up to look at him. Her lips pouted for a moment, probably drawing attention to them in the process, and her heart began to race. She wanted him too...and she assumed that he did too...but she was afraid that he was going to lean forward and...

But the scene didn't play out that way and an obvious frown appeared on her lips the moment his hand left her face, but her eyes stayed on his. Her gaze only shifted when he spoke, asking her what it was she was doing and, to be completely honest, she didn't know. She was a giant walking contradiction right now and nothing was making any sense besides one thing: she didn't want him to move too far away from her. "Don't...run away from me again...please..." Her gaze lifted up again to meet his and she gave his hand a gentle tug towards her. They could sit down if he wanted to, since standing had cause that to happen, but she also felt as though one or both of them should just leave. She still needed to pick her letters up off the ground and he needed to write the one he had been working on before she had interrupted.

She tugged on his hand again, just in case he had missed it the first time and her eyes flicked somewhere that they really should not have. "...please..." She was still crying and shaking slightly, which was to be expected because she was an emotional wreck, and all the smart decisions she had made earlier had been taken from her memory. "...Lewis..."

Lislchen 03-28-2012 10:42 AM

The minutes passed - or so it seemed to Lewis anyway - in which he just stared at Kurumi and she stared right back, without either of them saying a word. She was frowning somehow but he didn't know why, and her hand was still holding on to his. What did this mean? He had to go. Like now. She had to know that too. Even if he didn't want to he had to get away from here, from her, or else...

When she finally answered his question, he swallowed hard again, even wincing a little at her choice of words. The again stung, and he felt his chest contracting once again. Thoughts of their encounter down at the lake came back to his mind and the way he'd just sort of abandoned her for completely selfish reasons. Abandoned her when she really could have used a friend. He didn't want her going through that again, and he also really didn't want to go through all that guilt again either.

But he just couldn't stay. Didn't she see?

Sort of ignoring the first tug on his hand, he just couldn't do that anymore with her second one which was a little more insistent that the first. Or maybe that was just his perception, since he was all too well-aware of what she was trying to do. He glanced down at her hand for a moment before looking back up, trying to meet her gaze. Only her eyes weren't on his...they were just a little bit lower, a place they really shouldn't be.

Without meaning to, he instinctively licked his lips and this time let himself move forward a little, using the tug on his hand as an excuse, an incentive, bringing them just a little closer together again. Hundreds of alarmbells were going off in his head but he ignored them for now, just taking a deep breath. Without really thinking about it he moved his hand a little so he could lace his fingers through hers and gave her hand a little squeeze again. "Kurumi, we-" Just like her he left the sentence open but it would've ended just like hers. -can't.

sweetpinkpixie 03-28-2012 12:20 PM

so cloooooooooose to feeling aliiiiive... [So Close plays in the background]
 
There were no excuses this time, not for her at least. She knew exactly what she was doing when she tugged on his hand and he stepped closer towards her. Her own feet mirrored this, and she brought the two of them together again as her heart raced. Her eyes went downwards again towards their feet and was just in time to catch his fingers interlacing with her own, whimpering slightly at the security she felt in his touch and bringing her eyes back up to his. She knew what she had said earlier, but each step he took away made her afraid she was losing him...like he was going to vanish into thin air and never come back.

When he spoke, leaving his sentence hanging just like she had before, her breath caught in her throat and a few more tears trickled down her cheeks as she nodded. She knew, but that hadn't stopped either of them before. It didn't make right now any more right. It really only made it more wrong... Her brothers had once told her that once a line was crossed, there was no going back. She hadn't understood it then, not even knowing what sort of line they were referring to was, but she did now and they were right.

They were right.

Kurumi whimpered again as she swallowed, pushing herself on to her tippy toes while the hand not in his reached up and ran itself up his jaw bone to his cheek and finally stopped when her fingers were in his hair. Her chest heaved again as her breath became uneven, but the feeling of Lewis' breath on her face and him being so close to her made her forget all the bad that was around her. She was safe and wanted and all she wanted to do was live in this moment, feeling his heart beating rapidly in unison with hers.

Her thumb traced the bottom of his lip and she looked at it with the hesitant eyes before looking back up at him. So many emotions were there, but she hoped that the one that was most important was conveyed before she closed her eyes. Unprepared for the sudden barrage of emotions that followed she pushed herself up on her tippy toes and, before she could talk herself out of it, her lips met his again.

The first kiss could have been blamed on curious desire.

The second kiss could not.

Lislchen 03-28-2012 06:51 PM

Lewis was certain that if he closed his eyes right now he would actually be able to see flashing red lights and signs saying DANGER!. Or at least that was indicated by his brain when she stepped closer too, bringing them dangerously close again. Though, somehow it seemed when it came to him and Kurumi there was no 'safe' distance to keep. And even if there was, they didn't take long to overcome it and end up being this close again. Taking her hand had been a mistake it seemed but none he would want to take back.

Her hand just felt way too good in his to ever want to let go.

Seeing those tears running over her cheeks, all Lewis wanted to do was reach up to wipe them away. But he knew that if he did that his hand wouldn't go back down and they'd already experienced what happened when he touched her face. And right now he still had a little bit of control over himself to stop himself from doing that. Actually, he just wanted to make those tears disappear. Forever. Make the reasons behind them disappear too. Tears were just wrong...and horrible to both observe and experience.

A shiver ran over him from the place where she'd touched his jaw, following the path her fingers had trailed and down his spine. Why was she doing that? Didn't she know what that did to him? Or maybe...that was exactly why she did it. But...he opened his mouth to protest, only nothing came out, his breath being caught in his throat when her fingers were suddenly on his lips. His eyes immediately went to hers, swallowing when he remembered how he'd just fantasized about touching them a few moments earlier.

And now she was touching his.

They were definitely back on them again, had probably never left the subject to be honest. There would never be a time when it wouldn't be in the back of their heads at least probably. He didn't want to meet her gaze again, knew what it did to him and his rational thinking but just couldn't suppress the urge. So when his green eyes met hers he just gazed right back into them, his heartbeat increasing when he saw what was there for him to see. What she wanted him to see. What she probably shouldn't want him to see but did nonetheless.

To Lewis it seemed like everything was happening in slow-motion. Kurumi had raised up on her tiptoes so their faces were sort of at level, and he had lowered his head a little, meeting her half-way. He still had time to stop this. Now, if he leaned back now and let go of her now, he could still avoid this. But truth is, he just didn't want to. Even though his head had started to hurt a little from all the protesting going on inside.

He just closed his eyes tightly to all of that and waited until her lips met his. Keeping completely still for a moment, he just enjoyed the fact that this time it had been her who'd inititated the kiss. When he wasn't able to wait a second longer, Lewis finally reached up with his other hand and ran it through her hair softly. He then rested his hand just above her jawline so that his palm was on her cheek and his fingers in her hair and pulled her face a little closer, returning the kiss.

Right now, he just didn't care anymore if this was right or wrong.

Bazinga 03-28-2012 11:34 PM

Minerva walked up the the owls. She hadn't been up here for ages. She didn't have an owl herself, but there was a cute little school owl she always liked to visit. She got up and looked around. She frowned when she didn't see him anywhere. Well he wasn't hers so of course he could be out for another student. She sat down and looked at the other owls feeling more alone then she did before. Se opened her parchment and began to write. Maybe midnight would come as she was writing.

DarkStorm 03-28-2012 11:42 PM

Text Cut: Minnie
Quote:

Originally Posted by Bazinga (Post 10966698)
Minerva walked up the the owls. She hadn't been up here for ages. She didn't have an owl herself, but there was a cute little school owl she always liked to visit. She got up and looked around. She frowned when she didn't see him anywhere. Well he wasn't hers so of course he could be out for another student. She sat down and looked at the other owls feeling more alone then she did before. Se opened her parchment and began to write. Maybe midnight would come as she was writing.



Harvey went upto the owlery to see Frost.. he hadnt seen him for a while not since he was busy studying and Frost came to him.. and he decided that it was time he went to Frost.. "Hey Frost buddy.. I am here.. where are you?!" he called out.. it was when he was looking around the owlery that he noticed a lone figure writing something onto parchment.. he smiled.. he looked around and saw that Frost was coming from outside.. and he waved to his owl and held out his arm for him to perch on.. and once Frost was on his arm.. he went over to her "Hey Mins.. how are you?" he asked smiling as he carefully sat down next to her with Frost still on his arm.

Bazinga 03-28-2012 11:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by EW_FAN (Post 10966702)

Harvey went upto the owlery to see Frost.. he hadnt seen him for a while not since he was busy studying and Frost came to him.. and he decided that it was time he went to Frost.. "Hey Frost buddy.. I am here.. where are you?!" he called out.. it was when he was looking around the owlery that he noticed a lone figure writing something onto parchment.. he smiled.. he looked around and saw that Frost was coming from outside.. and he waved to his owl and held out his arm for him to perch on.. and once Frost was on his arm.. he went over to her "Hey Mins.. how are you?" he asked smiling as he carefully sat down next to her with Frost still on his arm.

Minerva looked up from her writing and quickly folded it. Did Harvey see what she was writing. She wasn't sure. She put on a fake smile "Hello Harvey, Hello Frost. How are you?" she was still upset with him from the other day at the Duck Pond. "What are you up to today?"


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