Well then. He was just going to walk away? How RU... oh he was back. Lexi sighed once more and slid her arm around him and rested her head against his arm. "It sucks. I know. But, don't shut me out, talk to me about how you are feeling," she said softly as she patted his back a little bit.

"I love you, Sabel. You are, by far, my best friend. The best friend I have ever had. A little piece of my heart is going to leave here with you, but it isn't goodbye. Not really. It's just... farewell, yeah? We will see eachother again, right? I will write to you more often than I should... I will tell you everything, even the stuff you don't want to know... It will be fine," she said. Really she was trying to convince herself that all of this was true. In reality: She was so afraid that this would be their final goodbye... they would grow apart... nothing would be the same... Her eyes welled up and she choked back a little sob as she buried her face in his arm.

It was getting harder to think. To hold everything in. When she wrapped her arms around him, he leaned into her. When she rested her head on his arm, he had to press his eyes closed. When she spoke of farewell, there was nothing left in his barriers. Even the hard swallow didn't save him from the sudden rush of emotion that overwhelmed him, and in an instant he found his head in his hands and his body trembling with tears he hadn't known he was keeping in.

Oh. Oh sweet Merlin, NO! He was crying? Had she broken him? She felt rather flaily and such. Taking a deep, yet shakey, breathe she scooted herself up under the arm she had just had her faced buried in. Taking her hands she placed them on top of his very gently.

"Please don't cry. You're breaking my heart," she said through sobs. Tears streamed carelessly down her face now and her small frame shook as well. Scooting closer still she removed her hands from his and just lay her head against him and cried softly.

"You promise me I won't lose you forever?" she whispered. It came from nowhere... she had not expected herself to be so vulnerable again. But... he was her BEST FRIEND. She did not want to lose him. To anyone, for any reason.

"Umm. Excuse me, that's my food you're chewing there."Adam said in a strong annoyed voice. He grabbed the plate and pulled it towards himself, pouring some pumpkin juice into the delicous grub.

He was hurting her, and he cursed himself for it. Kicked himself and shouted at himself internally. Tried desperately to stop. But the tears only came harder. And as she wiggled into his arms, he drew them around her and held her close, with the want of never letting go. One of his first friends. One of his best friends. One of the people he had shared all the hurt and pain of life with, who he had seen smile in the worst of times. And in a few days, he would never see her again.

It had him holding her tightly to him, terrified. He didn't want it to happen again, he was scared to death of it happening all over again. And all that pain was coming forth now. When he least needed it, when it was most hurtful to those he cared about. And he could do nothing to stop it.

So when she asked for that promise, he could only nod his head against her shoulder, could only mumble a quiet agreement through the constriction in his throat. Embarrassement wasn't even a factor of consideration.

Lexi was slightly shocked by the amount of emotion he was showing. It was good though. Very cleansing. He needed to let it all out. She could only snake her arms around him and hold him just as tight as she could and rock them both slightly from side to side.

Shushing him slightly she moved one hand up to cup the back of his head with one shaky hand. "It's okay, you know. You aren't supposed to cry because it's over... You're supposed to smile because it happened," she said in a tight voice.

She could say such things, because she was the strong one for the moment. She had to say the reassuring things for them both. In reality she was dying inside. She knew he would always be there when she needed him most... he always was. In some form or fashion. Always.

He knew it was true. Each and every word. Which was probably why he ended up nodding a little. It was true. But it didn't change the surge of emotion that gripped him with all its insanity.

Even his hand curled around her arm as he tried to calm down. But there didn't seem to be any place to turn or run that he wasn't confronted with what he feared most. It was like a head-on collision that came out of no where.

"I'm...scared." He didn't care how childish or immature it sounded. It was the plain, agonizing truth. He had been terrified all semester and he couldn't hide it anymore.

He nodded, that was good. But, he was still upset and it hurt.

...

"Oh Sabel, we're all afraid of the unknown, aren't we? You have nothing to be afraid of though. You will succeed at everything you try. You will be happier than you could ever imagine... I just know it," she said in her best reassuring tone... you know... through the sniffles and tears and such.

Still rocking them slightly she sighed as she nuzzled her face into his neck a little bit. "Sabel. What are afraid of? Starting fresh? Growing up? Leaving here? Leaving Arya? I promise you, everything is going to be alright..." she trailed off.

It wasn't alright, though. She didn't want to let him leave her. She wanted to be selfish and keep her friend forever. And ever.

Caroline finished chewing her food. "Geez, Adam! What's has your wand in a knot this morning?" She asked sipping her pumpkin juice. Pulling her plate closer to her and giving Adam a 'that's my plate' look. "The house elves are feeding your Gryffindors better then the Slytherins, what is up with that?" She asked.

"I wouldn't know. I NEVER took food away from other houses without asking one of my friends from that house first..I"M NOT rude."He said, folding up his arms.

"Nothings got my wand in a knot...Maybe you're on your period..."Ada suggested, raising an eyebrow, not letting her take all the lip.

In some ways he was glad she asked, and in other ways he would have preferred she didn't. Needless to say, it took a moment for him to find enough breath to be able to speak, and even then he just wanted to hide away. "Leaving...Hogwarts is a home...a haven...despite how screwed up things can get here, somehow they are always okay. And I don't...I'm terrified of saying goodbye....again." The last time he had said it, it had been eternal.

Lexi tried to blink away the fresh wave of tears that came, but failed. They splashed down her cheeks and she took in a shaky breath after breath. "I know it is, Sabel. It's home to me, too. But, you have to know that everything will work itself out... somehow. It always does, right? Well, not always, but sometimes," she said with a mirthless chuckle.

Oh crikey. He was killing her. Taking her arms from around him she reached up and cupped his chin, pulling his face down so she could look him in the eyes. "It's not goodbye. It's farewell. The people you love are ALWAYS with you, Sabel. Always," she said as she thought of Dora... and how much it hurt, but how she still felt her presence in certain things. "It's scary as hell. Setting out to start over, but if you don't you will just float wherever you are... wallowing in self pity. Then you will regret the things you didn't do when you had the chance and become miserable all over again," she said with a little smile.

Caroline squinted her eyes. "Last time I checked I didn't have to ask permission to sit where ever I want."

She dropped her folk at Adam's comment. How rude? She rolled her eyes. "Whatever, Adam. I just thought you lost your man bag or something."

"You can sit wherever you want, but you can't eat whatever you want..."He told her off.

"Whatever! Last time you'll be seeing this redhead around Hogwarts for a very long time. And I'm not just talking about summer break...I'm leaving Hogwarts after this term is over...That's what got my WAND in a KNOT!"He explained to her rather roughly. He looked around the great hall, watching all the students chatting with each other, probably all talking about what they would do together for summer break...Adam wasn't doing any of that, the opposite in fact.

She was right. She was so right and it had him dropping his eyes out of a sort of shame and embarrassement for being so childish. Again, he nodded his head a little, drawing his hand up to wipe weakly at his tears. He shouldn't be crying. He had to stop.

A shaky breath came in through his mouth as he straightened a little, wiping his hand on his pantleg before patting her hand on his cheek gently. "Onwards and upwards. Forward as long as its not backwards." Another slow, uneven breath as he attempted to stuff all the emotion back inside. "I know."

Nudging him slightly with her elbow she dropped her hand from his cheek and took his in her grasp. "Don't hide your feelings. You will go mad if you tuck it all away," she said in all seriousness. It never did anyone any good to hide their emotions. "You can only cork those emotions for so long before they build up and explode, Sabel. It's okay to be sad, or scared, or confused. Merlin knows I have been for years," she told him with a little smile.

Leaning her head back against him she let out a small sigh. "I suppose what hurts the worst is knowing that everything is changing again... it'll never be the same," she said in a miserable tone.

Smiling the blonde nodded.Why would she be so crazy and leave her best friend? He was one of the best things that had ever happend to her."You always look good",she giggled,"but glitter makes you more rocker-ish."Hearing that his heart was still broken let the girl sigh alittle.What was wrong with Rex' girlfriends?!

He nodded his head until he heard that miserable voice from her. He didn't like it one bit and all of a sudden all thoughts around his fears and pains became of second importance. His arms wrapped around the Gryffindor protectively and he gave her a big, warm hug. "It'll work out." Somehow. "You'll be okay."

Giving as best a shrug as she could as she wrapped her arms back around him she sighed heavily and buried her face in his chest. "Yeah, but that doesn't mean it won't hurt like hell anyway," she said in a muffled voice as she sniffled slightly.

It seemed that every year it got worse. The people she loved left her and things changed for the worse. She was quite tired of going through it time after time.

All too true. The very reason that they had ended up in this embrace in the first place.

"I know..." It was a quiet response, somewhat lost in her hair as he rested his chin on the top of her head. "I wish I knew how to keep it from hurting you."

"It's just a fact of life... you get hurt. Things change. People move on. It is part of growing up," she said as she moved her head ever so slightly to rest her cheek against his chest.

"Sometimes I really just want to leave here before anything else can hurt me, ya know." Maybe it didn't make sense, but it did to HER.

Another slow nod. He seemed to be doing that a lot.

Letting out a slow breath, he sat in silence for a good few moments, collecting his thoughts, weighing his options. When he finally brought himself to speak, his voice was quiet but at peace with his decision. "I can't stay behind, as much as I would like to. But I can leave a little piece of me." He gave her back a gentle rub. "Would you like to have Merlin?"

Lexi sat in stunned silence for a moment. Merlin? He wanted to know if she wanted Merlin? Pulling back to look at him with tear filled eyes, her little lip wibbling at him... "Merlin? B-b-but you love him," she said in a tight voice. Of COURSE she wanted the kitty. That kitty was total win. And he would remind her of Sabel, so double win.

A small smile touched his lips, his hands coming up to cup her cheeks and his thumbs stroking her skin to wipe away the tears. "I do. But I don't think I can take him with me. I don't know where I'll be placed or what I'll be doing. I doubt I'll be home much, if I can even find a home that will allow me to bring him in."

Tears pressed at the corners of his eyes, but he did his best to keep them back. "I can't think of a better place for him to go. And I don't think he can either." The kitty after all, did love Lexi.

Lexi nodded her head, lips trembling, tears falling freely once more. "Sweet Merlin, Sabel... You are going to make me a basketcase. Of course I will keep him. I will take very good care of him. Give him all the love and attention that he needs. I promise," she choked out as she reached up and took his hand away from her cheek and kissed it before pressing it back against her cheek.

Closing her eyes tightly she tried to steady her breathing and calm herself down... to no avail just yet. "I don't want you to go. I want to be selfish and greedy."