Kitchen Level Corridor
 

The Kitchen and Hufflepuff Common Room are accessed via the staircase to the right of the main staircase in the Entrance Hall. You follow along a bright corridor adorned with paintings, the most notable of which is the still life of a bowl of fruit (with a particularly ticklish pear).

"I can cook." Ethan offered. "Better at doing it outdoors though." He paused before adding in a thoughtful tone, "Everything is better outdoors."

Gee this was almost fun. Zan fought the urge to swing their joined hands as they walked to the kitchen, but he did stop dragging against her and walked next to her properly. "I like house elves. The Hogwarts house elves in particular. They are very good little chefs. I wonder if it's because of the facilities?"

"Most things," was all Cari was willing to concede. She was outdoorsy enough, but she didn't like the idea of going for days without a shower. Not Fun. And being a Healer without sterile conditions is a pain.

"It probably doesn't hurt anything to have access to a kitchen like this," said Cari, tickling the pair. It giggled girlishly, and a passage revealed itself, "But I like to think that Hogwarts Elves are just particularly good Elves. After you, Professor."

"Oh no. After you." Ethan gently nudged her shoulder, decidedly creeped out by the giggling pear. "Might I inquire what your favourite outdoor activity is, Cari?" He frowned a little as his stomach grumbled again.

Three laps of the first floor corridor... and a half hour later, Varius could be seen walking in baby steps down to the kitchen level of the castle. Normally he would take this route to go to his common room, but that was not why he was here this time. He had a meeting with none other than Miss Toussiant, who was (hopefully) going to assist him in acting out on some particular thoughts he had on a certain ghost.

He noted that the Ravenclaw fourth year wasn't yet here, so stood outside the portrait of the 'giggling pear'. He wouldn't be able to recall how he knew of the kitchens whereabouts... he supposed it was just something built-in to every Hufflepuff being so close to it and all..

"Hiiiiiii Vaaaarius!" Celandine was wearing her seaweed necklace, it was now nice and dry. "Am I late? I'm sorry! I had to change She grinned at him and scratched her leg with her foot. "So why are we here?" Celandine tipped her head at him so he could rub it if he wanted, she didn't mind, it was kind of like a nice massage. Cela eyed the portrait of the bowl of fruit curiously and offered another cheerful grin at V.

"Celandine," Varius greeted, accepting her offer of a rubbable head and ruffled the girls hair. She looked very pixyish in her little blue dress and white shoes. But not the horrible kind of blue pixie... no, like a pretty pixie in those muggle fantasy stories. Muggles were such strange creatures. "You look awfully pretty today," he complimented - girls liked that right? It meant they would do stuff for you-- or so his Dad told him during one of the total of three meetings he had had with him.

Then he noticed it! His present! "Oh wow," he reached out and touched it, not caring whether or not Cela(ho) minded him invading her personal bubble like this. A head rub and a neck touch may just be pushing his luck afterall. "I personally think I chose well. I am glad you liked your present," this had really put him in a good mood and even further confirmed that Cela(ho) had been the best candidate for this here job.

However, when it came to actually telling Cela(ho) about why they were here he began to blush in his rather pale cheeks. "Well..." Celandine was a master of the romances, she wouldn't mock him, "I need your help in order to impress a girl I like."

Wow, Varius Tipps in love-- who knew!

"I know." Celandine answered in cheerful agreement to Varius' compliment. She ran her fingers through her hair and nodded enthusiastically. "I do like it! Now that it's dry you can see all the pretty colours..." She beamed at him. "I'm totally glad you came to my party, V."

That was... like his name now.

She blinked at him, not registering the blush on his cheeks, but simply attempting to process his words. "My help? You like a girl? What kind of like? What kind of girl? Do you want to kiss her? Kissing is pretty awesome, V." Celandine looked at the portrait again and tugged on the hem of her dress.

"It is rather pretty," Varius agreed, "When I heard a wizard telling me about it I thought he was just having a laugh and then I came across your invitation very last minute having just placed it on a table somewhere random in my house, I just went with it. Afterall, getting a proper gift for a girl takes AGGGGGESSSSS of thinking... does it not?" Varius seemed to be some sort of girl genius these days apparently.

Her flood of questions had been quite intimidating and Varius was not one of those people to be particularly effected in that way. "Yes, yes, like-like, the kind of girl who isn't presently here with us, I suppose and do you really think so, C?" he said testing out the initial referencing thing, Cela had adopted and also answering all of her questions in their respective order.

"Does it?" Celandine thought about it, she was actually fairly easy to buy for, partly on account of her appreciating everything and partly on account of the things she did like were mostly quite obvious.

Pink, Candy and books for those of you who haven't been paying attention.

Celandine nodded at his answers. Not presently here with us? "Oh so you don't like me then? That's probably good, V." It wasn't like Cela needed anyone else to like-like her.

"Oh yes, kissing is the BEST." Celandine lowered her voice, "Better than candy and icecream. I'm getting pretty good at it." Celandine told him, tossing her head and ignoring the little angsty sensation that came with that statement. Best NOT to think about Copernicus or Plymouth right now... she'd run into them soon enough.

"No..." Varius agreed, deciding the true meaning behind those words could remain a secret for a little longer, "It is not you that I like."

However, the next words to leave Cela's mouth were so unbelievable that Varius thought she was making up. "Better than ice cream and sweets? I don't believe you!" And he didn't suppose anything Cela would say could possibly convince him. "Oh, you are?" He didn't say it as if he was surprised she was a good kisser, just taken aback by the statement itself, "Maybe you could teach me," he added rather bluntly as an afterthought.

"That's good!" Celandine told him, finding it a bit of a relief that she wouldn't have to add someone else to the list.

"It's true V!" Cela insisted, "You should believe me, I spent all of last term and most of the summer researching it! And everyone knows how much I like icecream and candy!" And water.

She laughed and gave him a conspirational grin, "I'm kind of good at everything." She tugged on her dress and cocked her head at him. "I think it's sort of just something that you do... and you are either good at it or not. Practice is probably a good thing... but..." Cela thought about it, "You can't explain how to do it, you just have to do it."

It was true. Celandine really did like her ice cream and thats when an image of her sausage concoction came back to him. Just as well they were near the kitchens, he may go for some before he put his plan into action.

Varius watched her as she cocked her head and seemed to go off in her own world trying to explain the concept of kissing. You were either good or bad apparently, and what if Varius was bad? He supposed practice made perfect.

He moved forward and placed his lips on Cela's, his eyes wide open. He wriggled his lips about for a moment before gasping for air. "How was that?" he asked genuinely, unphased by his actions. The kiss meant nothing to him, he was merely practicising as Cela had suggested... little did she know she had offered herself up as 'Mz practice dummy'.

....

Whaaa?!

What was he doing? What was that? Cela wrinkled her nose, freezing under the surprise attack. It was like... kissing... the back of your hand if the back of your hand happened to be wriggling like a goldfish and doing it's absolute best to smear your strawberry lipgloss all over your face and smoosh your lips against your teeth... Cela blinked. He was staring at her! Eyes wide open!

When he pulled away she stared back. "Varius that was terrible! Do you even like candy and icecream? Couldn't tell by that!" She shook her head, "You need more practice. A bunch more."

Did all Hufflepuffs kiss like that?

Cela made a mental note to stick to Ravenclaws.

At first, Varius couldn't really read Cela's face so he had originally expected it to be good news. He had made her speechless, right? He had been that amazing that she was SPEECHLESS! However... no.

Cela began to give her judgements and they were not good. Once she was done he pondered for a moment wondering what on earth he may have done wrong! "Well," he began, "You weren't all that great yourself. You left some sort of slime all over my lips!" He rubbed off the 'slime' that happened to be lipgloss.

"Not now though C, we can practice later. We should really get on with what I asked you down here to do," he looked over his back to make sure no Hufflepuff was coming out of the common room or coming down from the Entrance Hall. "I need you to help me cover myself in flour."

"Beg your pardon, but have any of you children seen the Headmaster?" the Grey Lady asked as she floated into the corridor.

"It's lipgloss." Celandine informed him, "And I wasn't kissing you." She'd have received an O grade for sure if she had been.

Wait... practice later? That made Cela giggle and she only giggled more when he asked to be covered in flowers. "Flower?" She managed, cocking her head and suddenly it clicked...

ZOMG! VARIUS TIPPS WAS CRUSHING ON PROFESSOR BUNBURY!

"Shall we go in the kitchen?" She didn't think there would be flowers in there, but there would probably be candy.

Cela looked up at her house ghost and waved happily.

"No, ma'am. I haven't seen him. Would you like us to help you look?"

"What do you mean you weren't kissing me? C, it is rather selfish if you don't let me practice the whole experience," he complained, licking his lips and appreciating any residue strawberry flavouring.

"Yes, flour," he confirmed, "I need to make myself look all white. I think she would appreciate it."

He nodded, "I think the elves will have plenty of the stuff." He reached out to tickle the pear when one of the ghosts turned up. Oh no! What if she was onto him. He didn't want her to behead him like that creepy Gryffindor ghost... or at least partially! Then she enquired about the Headmaster's whereabouts.

"In his office?" he offered.

"He isn't in his office, dear children," Helena began. "I'm afraid our Headmaster gets lost very easily and we ghosts have been worried ever since he failed to appear at the Opening Feast. If you could just look in odd nooks and crannies for the lost man, we'd be grateful."

"I didn't expect you to just... lip smoosh me like that, V!" Celandine made a face. "I'm not supposed to just kiss anyone you know." She solemnly reapplied her lipgloss and offered him the tube.

"Flower." She repeated. Awww. Cela hadn't noticed Varius had a funny way of speaking before. Of course he'd be alright! "You'll be fine! She totally would appreciate it!"

"Anything you say ma'am." Celandine offered a cheerful curtsey. "Does he have a favourite candy we could maybe lure him out with?"

What?

It worked on her.

He accepted the tube and squished out some of the gel, before licking it up. "Where did you get this candy? It tastes great!" he handed it back over before he would finish the whole tube off.

"Do you think she would? I just want her to feel more comfortable and I think if I put her in a situation she is more... used to, she would be," how nice and thoughtful of Varius Tipps, eh? Even if he did kiss all smushy!

"Oh was he not? I always thought the Headmaster was that creepy old guy who scares the living bajeebies out of everyone," Varius pondered a moment trying to think who the actual Headmaster could be, "Maybe he's at the loo? Student's gotta learn, Headmaster's gotta poop."

Helena smiled. "Myrtle has already checked all of the toilets and u-bends in the school. She even checked the Prefect's bathtub."

Cedric was walking in the kitchen corridor as he noticed the Grey lady."Hello there!"Cedric greets the ghost waving his hands.He want to go in their common room.He needs to rest and to relax,he was sick because he take the fever fudge accidentally.But he's feeling better now because of the antidote given by the Healer,Miss Avalon.

"It isn't candy." Celandine told him. Geee if he thought that was candy, he was missing out. She pocketed the tube and nodded enthusiastically.

"Oh she would! Do you think she likes the lake? I haven't seen her down there but... well she might like it, right? Plants... water... a whole bunch of water really. But it's pretty down there and good for kissing as long as you aren't silly enough to get caught by like... Professor Vindictus or Groundskeeper Masterson." She beamed at Varius, giving him a I-never-get-caught-being-bad look, even though... well... she had.

"Myrtle is wonderful." Celandine decided. "Oooh. Maybe one of the professors knows where he is. Like... Professor Bunbury? She knows everything, she's wonderful!"

Cela kind of thought everyone was at least a bit awesome.