Trumpets sound and the man of the hour appears from the curtain behind the stage.

Applause are necessary.

Lord Borr raised his beefy hand to give sign that the trumpets could stop and the crowds could settle. He was, after all, VERY busy and even MORE important than ever these days. Time was ticking and daylight was burning!



"SETTLE DOWN, SETTLE DOWN." Lord Borr chuckled and was absorbed into his large throne. His voice was magnified throughout the tent, but in case anyone missed the loud boom of Borr, he also BEAT the dais with his scepter-like-cane.


"Welcome, welcome to this VERY important occasion! I see many of you showing your APPRECIATION." The people near the dais wearing the light blue tee-shirts all got a NOD of approval from the large man. He paused to pick out the few in the crowd that did NOT have on the shirts.

"Someone get the Headmaster a shirt!" He pointed his scepter to the area that seated all the guests from Hogwarts.


"Before we make announcements, the CHILDREN of Hogwarts have PREPARED a little musical dedication to start our event out. COME ON UP here children! Come sing for us all!"

Erica felt incredibly special right now. Although others would be frowning upon her, sitting with Lord Borr as one of those 'important ministry officials', she truly didn't mind. She had a good seat and they all did not.

*Smirk*

The Creatures Department Head clapped on queue as he made his big entrance, smiling softly before looking across at the other people atending. The Blonde couldn't help but snort slightly as it was requested the students were to sing for them. Well that would be interesting, here's hoping that they could actually hold a note in tune, she didn't particularly appreciate it if they made her ears bleed.

Well, what a load of poo. NO ONE else was going to do as asked by Lord Borr? She wondered if he would mind if she sang that song that goes, "Alllll by myseeeeeleeeelf!" 'Cause she was.

Not even the GRYFFINDOR'S would accompany her to the dais.

Well she stood before the steps, smile on her face, head held high. "Your Lordship, thank you for gracing us with your awesome presence today. I would like to sing the school song for you and all of our guests if that is suited to your liking, sir," she said with a little curtsey.

Yeah she remembered Borr from Hogwarts. She wasn't getting hit with that scepter... No way no how.

Tate stopped right in front of Lord Borr, pausing for a moment to show off the t-shirt for approval. It was a ridiculous thing to make people wear, and he would probably burn it first chance he got, but he managed to make it look as if he meant to wear a t-shirt pulled over dress robes. He made this look good.

"Lord Borr. Congratulations on your promotion on behalf of myself and the students and professors of Hogwarts. I'm afraid there was a breakdown in communication between your office and mine, but if you require a song..."

Tate glanced sideways at Lexi Denver. If she really REALLY wanted to sing, who was he to stop her? "I'm sure we can come up with something."

Oh. Good. Headmaster Hottie was there to save her from what was sure to be a brutal spit fest from Lord Borr. She scooooooooted a little bit closer to the man and looked at him with BIG eyes that clearly said 'Thank you'.

Tugging on his dress robe sleeve she mouthed the words SCHOOL SONG to him and nodded her head.

Lord Borr's chair made a loud, long "creaking" sound when he shifted around to wave his beefy hand at the Creature Department Head. The "chair" must have been oozing an icky smell too. The dais was hit with a strong, pungent odor.

"Glad you could make it, Erica. Lovely day for such an occasion!" Lord Borr chuckled and wafted the odd odor away from him and towards the stairs where the first Hogwarts guests were arriving.

ABOUT TIME.


"Making excuses, are you Headmaster??" Lord Borr looked around the dais to his fellows and colleagues. "When Miss Melita was at the school, some of the BEST YEARS in Hogwarts HISTORY, the children were ALWAYS prepared with song."

Lord Borr's bones creaked and rattled as he got up from his chair, a new wave of odor hit the dais with a powerful punch. "Come on up here, children. Lord Borr will lead you in song!" With his cane, he pushed "Headmaster" Tate aside and placed his free hand on Lexi Denver's shoulder. "Come up here with this brave and promising young lady! Don't be shy!"

Oh Dear Merlin. Lexi tried her hardest not to pull a face as his ODOR invaded her nostrils. Oh she was going to FAINT she was sure of it. Taking sharp breaths in through her mouth she tried to make grabby hands for the Tatertot's robes as Lord Borr pushed him aside. EEP!

His beefy hand clasped onto her shoulder and made her knees wobble a bit. Be GENTLE, could you?! Little GIRL here. Sheesh.

...

OH. He called her BRAVE and PROMISING. How lovely. She still wanted to shove her fingers in her nose to block out the odor, but she couldn't help but smile as he said those words.

There was a dias. Of course. There was a throne dias.

The man tried sinking into his hair, massive hand hiding half of his angular face. Fortunately, his mess of dirty blond hair was long enough to hide part of his blush. It didn't, however, make him invisible to everyone as much as he would will it; he often wished it was long enough to keep his gray-blue eyes from finding his Uncle Bert, wobbling around with his scepter.

Merlin, he was embarrassing.

It wasn't as embarrassing as the shirt he had been forced to put on that morning. Ocean Tea Jones sank deeper into his chair, wondering what would it take for this party to end abruptly. A Hippogriff stampede? A sudden swarm of billywigs?

And now children were going to sing. Children. Singing. Last encounter Ocean had with Hogwarts' children didn't leave him with lasting impressions about their singing prowess. They were; however, extremely good at setting off booby traps.

Ocean snorted behind a hand, hiding his smile effectively mostly from his Uncle rather than the source of his amusement: the obviously foolish girl. Who willingly volunteered for this kind of embarrassing thing? Did she have no pride? She was obviously a Gryffindor.

So it was down to him screwing up, rather than someone on Borr's team? Fine. Whatever.

"I'm afraid they're unavailable for singing right now, sir," Tate put his hand on Lexi's other shoulder and snaked her back around to stand nearer to him. He wanted a buffer between his kids and the man with the flailing cane. "But Miss Denver and I would like to sing you a special rendition of the school song."

And maybe any other students who felt brave enough would join them.

Neutral expression until he hit the stench that was at the dais. It was like walking into a brick wall and deserved several quick blinks. Steering right around the large man, he made his way to Lexi's other side giving Tate a tight lipped smile. Wasn't this fun?

Once beside Lexi, he made sure to shoot the 'Lord' a look that clearly said this wasn't for him. Because it really, really wasn't.

Dipping his hand down, he gently took Lexi's in his and gave it a slight squeeze. Sorry I'm late. Good grief this is bad. Perhaps they could squeeze their eyes shut and get it over with. But right now, plugging the nostrils seemed better.

Christelle stood by quietly, a pursed smile on her fleshy lips. The students of Hogwarts looked so adorable from where she stood with their wide eyes and crookedly open little mouths. It made her heart ache for about a few seconds. Poor darlings. They looked as lost and confused as baby deer.

"Oh, my!" commented Christelle, clasping her hands and leaning forward slightly. "A song directly from the Headmaster's lips. Indeed, this can only happen for Lord Borr."

Another boy joined them and Rochebarron watched him through her lashes cautiously. He looked a little sickly. Perhaps he was a victim of stage fright?

Aaaaaaaaaaaaand with one last LEAP, Jake was up on the dias, a HUUUUGE grin on his face. The young man was probably trembling so much he was fuzzy around the edges.

BUTNOMATTER.

"Lord Borr!" the young man exclaimed in an extravagant manner, and bowed LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW to the floor like a house elf, with super accentuated movement.s

"Sing song, eh?! Let's do this!"

SO.

MUCH.

SUGAR.

EEP! She was being passed around like a doll. She gladly snaked around behind Tate though, hands full of his Borrapalooza shirt, peeking from around him. Perhaps if she buried her FACE in Tate's clothes she wouldn't die from the terrible gas that was overtaking them.

As she peeked around Tate she caught the MAN snorting at her and pulled a face. How rude. She was BORED and not only that, she was doing as she was ASKED. Meaniehead.

Oh there was Sabel. She wouldn't have to poke him with a stick while he slept then. Good for him. She released her grip on Tate's shirt to take Sabel's hand and smiled softly. She was STILL upset that she had to be the one to come out first, but Tate and Sabel were here now so she felt better about things. And standing behind Tate DID block the stink rolling off Lord Borr.

OH!

And NOW Jakers showed up. She was going to throw shoes and dinner rolls at all of them. Later of course. When they got back to school.

Kurumi stood frozen in place for a moment. Musical? They had prepared something? As long as there was a piano, Kurumi could play something for the others to sing to.

Still clutching the box of cookies in her hands, Kurumi decided first that she should thank Lord Borr for the invitation.

Taking a timid step forward, Kurumi approached him and first bowed at a deep 90 degrees. "Lord Borr," Kurumi said taking a deep breath to calm her nerves. "My name is Kurumi Hollingberry. I am a second year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardy and I would like you to accept this box of cookies that I baked as my humble way of offering thanks to you for inviting me here today."

Kurumi bowed again and extended her hands forward with the box of cookies held in them.

Lord Borr's nephew, Thomas Borr, was NOT doing as he was supposed to. Lord Borr should have KNOWN better. "THOMAS. GET UP AND HELP THESE CHILDREN UP ON THE DAIS." MERLIN. "THEN STAND BY ME. You're my NEPHEW and you're supposed to BE BY MY SIDE."

Lord Borr tried to hit the young slacker that shared Borr's blood, but he was just out of reach.


"You're afraid? What sort of Headmaster is afraid? I expect BETTER, Mr. Tate. BETTER! You hold the FUTURE of our world in your little school." He waved a hand that they could proceed. They WERE, after all, BURNING DAYLIGHT. Lord Borr had been GENEROUS to have this party at ALL with SO MUCH to DO.

It was rude of the Hogwarts folks to waste SO much time when there was SO much to do.

"Ah. My Christelle. Did you hear the Headmaster blame YOU for their not being prepared? Have you ever heard of such a thing? Don't YOU expect better?" Lord Borr CERTAINLY did.


"HO HO HO!!!" Lord Borr BOOMED just like Santa. "HOOOOOOOOO indeed!" He clapped and kicked and jigged. "Another young Gryffindor? Who is their Head of House? Are they here? I see SOME house is doing it right at that SCHOOL!!!"

To the young Kurumi, Lord Borr bowed and stooped to be nearer to her. "Welcome Miss Hollingberry and thank you KINDLY for your GIFT!" He took the cookies and tore into them almost immediately.

Now that the CHILDREN of Hogwarts HAD indeed, in spite of Mr. Tate's foolishness, joined him on the dais, he sat back down to listen to them sing. "Go on children! Sing for your Ministry!" He set the crowd to PRE-APPLAUSE. "Don't be shy! SING!"

Kurumi thought her arms were going to be taken off with the force from Lord Borr's snatching of her box of cookies. When she looked up from her bow, her eyes bugged out of her head when she saw that essentially all the cookies were gone.

At least her mother would be proud of the way she had introduced herself and offered the gift?

"The Gryffindor Head of House is Madam Donovan," Kurumi said shyly. "I am afraid she is not here."

Kurumi then looked around at her schoolmates and the Headmaster nervously. They were going to sing? Focusing on the Headmaster now, Kurumi lowered her voice. "Headmaster, if you conjure a piano I can play."

A few other students joined him, nearly all Gryffindors plus Jake Upstead who was clearly suffering from a nervous breakdown of some sort, and Tate shoved back his shoulders in acceptance of the very painful thing that was about to happen.

"I brought the Hufflepuff and Slytherin Heads with me, sir, but the Gryffindor Head of House was not invited, unfortunately," and he wasn't going to talk about what he was afraid might happen. It was violent and might get him thrown out of the party.

"Follow me, and don't worry too much about it," he spoke out of the corner of his mouth, hoping those few standing with him would sing loudly and as close to the right notes as they were able. Everything painful faded in memory.

"Hogwarts, Hogwarts, Hoggy Warty Hogwarts,
Teach us something, please,
Whether we be old and bald
Or young with scabby knees,
Our heads could do with filling
With some interesting stuff,
For now they're bare and full of air,
Dead flies and bits of fluff,
So teach us things worth knowing,
Bring back what we've forgot,
Just do your best, we'll do the rest,
And learn until our brains all rot."

HAH! The meaniehead was Borr's NEPHEW! And he was being reprimanded... in a sense. Nah nah nah nah! Lexi stepped out from behind Tate, after taking a GREAT breath in from the shirt shoved in her face, and smiled brightly at Lord Borr.

Clearing her throat a few times she began to sing along with her Headmaster in a loud, clear voice. Much louder than one would imagine the little thing could belt out. It was that... or suffer hearing loss from the awful pitch that Tate was singing on. IF that could be considered singing.

"Hogwarts, Hogwarts, Hoggy Warty Hogwarts,
Teach us something, please,
Whether we be old and bald
Or young with scabby knees,
Our heads could do with filling
With some interesting stuff,
For now they're bare and full of air,
Dead flies and bits of fluff,
So teach us things worth knowing,
Bring back what we've forgot,
Just do your best, we'll do the rest,
And learn until our brains all rot."

Contrary to popular belief (i.e. Berty Borr) his name was NOT Thomas Borr. It was Ocean Tea Jones. It was the name given to him by his deceased parents. He had long given up on correcting his Uncle, and merely accepted as part of his bitter fate. Reluctantly, Ocean obliged his Uncle's wishes.

"Help the children!" he repeated loudly as he stood up, tugging on his t-shirt. Honestly, if he was to help the children it would be to help them GET AWAY and not UP ON THE DIAS. Ocean walked down the steps of the dias and stared directly at the crowd of students some looking confused others looking rather put off. Well, I don't want to be here either, he thought resolutely. But if he was going to suffer so did everyone else! Yeah, that was possibly a childish thought but there you had it.

"If you have legs, you can stand up. If you're not mute, you can sing," informed Ocean loudly. "If you are mute, I apologize for being insensitive. It's just in my nature. Now, up you go!" he finished and gestured towards the dias.

The quicker the easier, he wanted to say but left it out. "You should all join your Headmaster. Don't you think so?" When he was at Hogwarts it was about solidarity. He supposed kids didn't know what that meant anymore. In any case it didn't matter because the current Headmaster seemed to take the brunt of the shame on his own and had started singing.

At least, Ocean thought it was singing but it sounded a lot like kneazles having their tails pulled by snot filled toddlers. Wincing, Ocean made it up the steps again and joined his Uncle's side; uncomfortably.

He tilted his head and pretended to be scratching one ear when he was really trying his best to plug it.

He really couldn't believe he was doing this. Really could not. Jake seemed more than happy while Kurumi looked rather scared and intimidated and Tate just...well Tate was a little more than concerning. How he would have liked to give Borr a piece of his mind. But, needless to say it was a rather confusing mix of emotions and motivations behind each and everyone of them. The sooner this was over and they could get off the dais, the better.

But at least they were singing about Hogwarts? Lovely Hogwarts. Rather than some man claiming to be a Lord. Still, the song wasn't very flattering.

With a wince and an inhale of as much good air as he could get, he joined in the off-key chorus, hoping that Lexi's singing would mask his own off-key tone.

"Hogwarts, Hogwarts, Hoggy Warty Hogwarts,
Teach us something, please,
Whether we be old and bald
Or young with scabby knees,
Our heads could do with filling
With some interesting stuff,
For now they're bare and full of air,
Dead flies and bits of fluff,
So teach us things worth knowing,
Bring back what we've forgot,
Just do your best, we'll do the rest,
And learn until our brains all rot."

Seeing that everyone was already singing, Kurumi looked around frantically for some sort of garbage. The first thing she spotted, unfortunately, was the remains of the box of cookies. "Excuse me, Lord Borr," she said reached out and taking the now empty box slowly from his hands. "I will be needing this."

Kurumi began to reach for her wand, when wizarding law rang in her ears. Wait...she wasn't allowed to perform magic outside of school. Turning her attention back to Lord Borr, since he did seem to be all official and all that. "With your permission, sir, I would very much like to transfigure this box into a piano so that I may accompany the others in performing the school song."

Christelle Rochebarron was vaguely aware of very displeased faces in the sea of Hogwarts students. She watched them carefully with clear blue eyes, engraving them to her memory, in particular the one who had seemed to be whispering suspiciously to the Ministry official. From where she stood, Christelle smiled down at her. It was a pity she hadn't joined them.

Christelle's smiled never faded. Instead, she allowed the corner of her eyes to crinkle for Her Lord's benefit. "My Lord, I'm sure there was just a slight miscommunication," chirped Rochellebarron, her eyes fleeting towards the Headmaster for millisecond. "I'm sure the students will be better prepared henceforth." Wouldn't they, Headmaster Tate?

She laughed softly and averted her eyes to the ground as soon as she felt the tension in the air. It was the time to grow silent. The singing began and her lips pursed. Christelle's face lit up and she looked up, nodding along to the rhythm of the song. She used her fingers as conductor baton's trying to encourage the people in the public to sing along.

They were all such sticks in the mud! Her attention diverted to the girl with the cookie box, requesting that she be allowed to perform a Transfiguration on it. Christelle's brows arched. Perhaps some students were better instructed than others.

Lord Borr prodded his nephew with the tip of sausage-shaped forefinger. "Good job, nephew. You make your Uncle Lord Borr prrrrrrrrroud," he rumbled.


With Christelle at his side, his nephew on the other, he TOO directed the singing with using his cane as a baton. "GOOD JOB, Children! GOOD JOB! I know you tried your hardest and I recognize how lacking in leadership you are. BE PROUD of yourselves and take a bow!"

Lord Borr petted the little Gryffindor that was trying to take away his cookie box like she was a lost puppy. "Christelle. Make sure this one get an extra gift bag free of charge." To the rest of the BRITISH WIZARDING WORLD he announced, "OUR FUTURE! How about a ROUND of applause for them??!!"


And then, as if he couldn't quite help himself, Lord Borr added, "They were to sing a dedication to the Ministry, and more precisely, to ME as your new VIP in the Ministry of Magic. However, they're unguided and sang the ONLY song they know. So give them a round of applause as they leave the stage! WELL DONE STUDENTS. WELL DONE. For the love of cookies, Tate, spare us all next time." Lord Borr honestly couldn't remember inviting the man up.

SOME people were SUCH glory hogs.