CHAPTAH 1
(Saga 1: Hogwarts House)
DESCRIPTION: Watch as 10 of your favorite witches and wizards are paired into one house! See the curses fly as they get into weird yet all around humorous situation!)
CHAPTER 1: HOUSE GUESTS OF BRITAIN!

The glowing yellow hippogriff lands in the lawn of..... Hogwarts Castle?
"No ruddy way....ain't now way this is Hogwarts, 'Arry! Its way to small!" Says a very large man with a large beard and a mullet.
"Hagrid makes a point, Harry!" Herm-ee-own mutters. Ron nods in agreement.

A sudden bright flash of light startles them all. An old man, I'd say 23, 24, (JK- more like 50,000. At least, that's what Aberforth said....) is standing there, in a dirty sleeveless shirt and undies. Harry falls over in fright, Hagrid's mullet stands on end, Hermione faints (in fright), Ron starts babbling (in fright) about Merlin's undies, and I'm gunna throw a robe on Dumby. They mutter thanks, and Dumbledore smiles warmly.
"Welcome to Wizards House! You are 4 of 10 who have been chosen for this reality show! Now, leave my presence, go to the Mini Hogwarts, and say hi to everyone else!" Dumbledore disappears into the night, snorting wildly like a pig. The 4 people make their way to the house. When they enter, they are greeted by Mrs. Weasley, Sirius, Gilderoy Lockhart (who asks them who they are, and for that matter, who he is.) and Remus. Harry gives them all a hug (except for Lockhart- he smells strongly of Draught of the Unicorn Brethren of Cookie and Milk and Warm Smiles, which, even though it has a nice sounding name, is quite icky, its all gelatinous and frothy and- yeah. back to the story.)

Harry quickly takes notice of the odd looks on their faces. He turns around, and almost wets himself in shock.
Intensely conversing with Snape, still without a nose, exceedingly pale even though he went tanning last summer, stood Voldy. He turns around......
***

OOOOH CLIFFHANGER! I certainly hope I made you titter. Up next: The Saga of Voldemort's Summer, then we'll come back to this

Great first chapter! Hello and Welcome to the Other Stories section! Be sure to read the rules, post often and most importantly have fun!

yay! A comedy! Good work and I'm laughing at herm-ee-own. I thought that was her name when I first read the books. Keep up the good work!

Thanks I always write serious stories, I needed some comedy.

SAGA 2: THE SUMMER OF BALDY-NESS AND NOSE-LESS-NES
CHAPTER 1: DEATH EATER'S SCHOOL IS OUT

Voldy stood at the top of the mountain, smiling proudly. His proud look turns into fear when he realizes his nose is missing!
"DEAR LORD MERLIN AND HIS BROTHER BOB! MY NOSE! I HAD SUCH A WONDERFUL NOSE, NOW ITS GONE, SO GONE, SO GONE....GONEGONEGONEGONEGONEGONEGONE!!" He twirls around, wildly shooting spells in every direction, his robe swirling majestically. Bellatrix tries to calm him, but gets hit with a Stupefy and goes flying. Snape runs away (in fright), Harry sleeps warmly in his bed at the Burrow, unaware of any of this, and Voldemort is hysterical.
"AND.... ARGH!!!! I'M SO PALE! OH SO PALE! PALEPALEPALEPALEPALEPALEPALEPALEPALEPALEPALEPALE! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Voldy crumples to his knees, but finds something interesting. It's a forgotten piece of a burger, carelessly thrown to the ground. The hamburg, for some odd reason I don't care to explain, looks like a nose to Voldeeeeemort, who promptly fastens the forgotten piece of meet to his long gone, snake-like schnoz.
"MY NOSE! OH MY NOSE IS BACK! OH YES!" He screams triumphantly. Bellatrix awakens from her KO (Voldemort 1, Bellatrix 0.) and runs to the Death Eater Lord guy.
"Master Voldy..... that is but a piece of meat!"
NO BELLATRIX! IT IS MY NOSE! HAHA! MY NOSE IS BACK IN BIZZZ---NAZZ, AND AIN'T NO ONE GUNNA DO NOTHIN' BOUT IT!"
Bellatrix stands shocked, her mouth open. Snape peeks from behind the tree.
"Haha! Oh yes, my dear nose, how you have missed your master such.... THIS NOSE NEEDS A DARK MARK! I DEMAND IT!"
Voldemort pauses, looking at his arms.
"I need a tan."

Hilarous! I can see Voldy doin that. Keep up the good work.

Very nice...

Thanks kind folks for the kind words Now its time for the third and final (for now) saga. This, in my opinion, is not like my other non-cannon stories, in that it's plausible to take place. Its a little ditty called "The Not So Irrelevant Adventures of James & Albus"!

CHAPTER 1:
The Polyjuice Mambo!

*******

A head shoots out around a corner, eyes narrowed, wand casting light into the dark corridor.
"Albus," The voice whispers cautiously.
"Yes, James?" A slightly younger sounding voice replied.
"Move out!" James jokingly says.
They moved around the corner, Albus smirking and checking a yellowed map, James cautiously checking everywhere for Filch, or worse, Crabbe & Goyle Junior.
"Take left....right about..... NOW!" Albus says.
James takes a left and finds a staircase.
"Down?" He asks, shining the light down the stairs.
"Ahyup." Albus says, chuckling. James carefully walks down the stairs, nearly tripping on one, grabbing the wall for assistance, only to find out the wall suddenly grew a STINKING NOSE.
He lets out a high pitched gurly man shriek, and bumps into Albus, who drops the map and begins a rumblin' tumblin' down the stairs, as a stupid sounding laugh echoes around the dungeon.

LOL! Great beginning. I can totally see all of this happening. But I'm laughing at the idea of a Crabbe and a Goyle Jr.

Very cute!

these are too funny! I love them KEEP THEM UP! PAMS!

You've got me in stitches with these. Keep up the awesome work

Really funny.........

Inactive - To delete 11/06/12

Reactivated per user's request.

(Saga 1: Hogwarts House)
CHAPTER 2: THATS...... UM........ OKAY.

Harry fell over. Fell over. OVAH. Voldemort turned around, his eyebrows raised. He noticed Harry on the ground. His expression turned to that of complete shock.
"OHMAHGAWD! SOMEONE! HELP THIS POOR BOY! OH MY GOD!" Voldemort threw his arms up in the air, panicking wildly. Snape ran away (in fright), and Sirius sighed, rubbing his temples. Remus begins screaming, and runs off into the night, growing a particularly soft mane of blue fur. Mrs. Weasley did the same, only she ran in the opposite direction. Ron was shocked! Why, he never, ever... EEEEEEEEEEVER knew his Mommy was a werewolf! He began bursting in tears. Hagrid stood awkwardly. Voldemort was still extremely panicky, and oddly enough, his robes were flowing for no good reason. I mean, these fabrics were really flapping about gracefully. Snape was hiding behind a mini version of some statue. Oh, I forgot to mention, when I said it was a smaller version of Hogwarts, everything was mini. A statue that would normally tower very high over students in normal Hoggy Warty Warts was small enough that it took Snape to crouch into a frightened ball to full shield him. Sirius, after a few moments, realized his hair was on fire after his excessive temple rubbing. He began panicking worse than Voldemort, running up the the mini stairs and tumbling down them, droppin' and rollin'.

Harry was still just kompletely, inkonceivably knocked out. He was having an odd dream about two children that look oddly like him, walking down to the Slytherin common room. One of them, apparently named James, grabbed for the wall and slapped a rather large boy across the nose. Harry awaoke, only to realize Voldemort was giving him CPR.

DUN DUN....DUN.

I've decided that Voldemort discovering his nose was more of a one shot, so we come to Albus and James' activities.

The Not So Irrelevant Adventures of James & Albus!

CHAPTER 2: And incredibly off-putting amount of Slytherin-ness!

Albus jumped up, his wand withdrawn. James was a little slower, as his head had softened Albus' fall. Albus was about to cast Flipendo, but Goyle Jr. was quick. Albus flipped, completely flipped, and landed back on his feet, losing his balance, and falling back down. James was hit with a Stupefy, and as Albus was gathering himself, he saw James fly by him, arms flailing. There was a thud, and a yell, and Albus realized James had hit the portrait that hid the Slytherin common room. Albus stood, and began casting more knockback jinxes. He managed to hit Crabbe Jr, and he dodged a counter Flipendo from Goyle.

"Mucus Ad Nauseam!" Albus shouted, and Goyle Jr. yelled as mucus began spurting from his nose. Albus began laughing as the sight that would make a Muggle sick. He heard a gasp, and the mucus stream stopped, and Goyle murmured a "I feel.... I feel lightheaded..." and fell over. Albus was frozen in place as the footsteps neared the staircase. It was teacher! Who?

"Albus Severus Potter! You've been without trouble for the last 4 months- Jeez, your mother and father won't be happy..." Said Herbology Professor Neville Longbottom. Albus' head fell. Neville began walking down the stairs, noticing James, who seemed rather loopy.

"Sorry Professor Longbottom..." Albus said. As Neville neared James, he looked down at Albus and said quietly,

"Good one, though. Now off the bed." Albus smiled, and ran up the staircase, as he heard Neville say, "Ennervate." and heard James come to with a bit of a gasp. He smiled, and looked down at his hand. A hair, belonging to Crabbe. In his other, a hair belonging to Goyle. This was coming along perfectly.

Cute chapters! Keep posting!