*Teddy & Ottery walk in read the sign* O: I was actually looking for a candy shop but ...
T: *smacks Otty* Read it!
O: *rubs head where Teddy smacked him*
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Originally Posted by
##Hermione&Draco## 
Made by: Jess, of Jess & Marcy's Fabtabulous Shop of Graphics O: Nice picture
but now onto the poem ...
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I Open At The Close
I have to admit that's a nice title.
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Walking through the neverendless dark forest...
thinking about all the fallen warriors that died fighting for me..in what seemed like a neverending..
bloody battle at Hogwarts....
They sacrificed their own lives....
just for me..
at the very end..
surrender into the grasp of my worst enemies...
and to take my own life away..
Step by Step..
I'm getting near..
The cold wind blowing in the air...
Okay, so let me start by saying ... you chose a very seirous topyic to write on and I think that's brilliant. Seriously. Poetry is about the more passionate, most powerful moments about ... well it can be about anything but you chose to write about something epic and ...all I can say is: Wow.
One, because that's a meaty subject and a lot of people might have been scared off by it, you're brave.
Two, because you write it so well.
You're right there at the start. Harry's thinking about everything that's just happened and he's walking to certain death ...
honestly I think you wrote it sooooooooooo well. The grammar could use some help but who am I to talk, right?
Neways, grammar aside, the words you chose and how you presented them is just beautiful. Seriously.
You are as good a poet as you are a writer Xavier. And you already know I think you're a brilliant writer.
*insert endless blushing on your part here*
What I highlighted that is brilliant by itself in the context of the whole poem. I mean, you point out all that sacrifice to save Harry because he's going to defeat Voldemort and what then? In the end, is it for nothing? Harry has to give himself up to save everyone else, too. The duality and the circularity of it in itself is poetic but ... wow, seriously, brilliant.
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I remember the images inside Hogwarts...
Shattered glass..
Broken walls...
Bloodstains upon the grounds..
While the dead lay in rows in The Great Hall..
The teachers were worried that the end of Hogwarts was to come..
For their protective charms didn't hold Voldemort's army for very long..
They fought brave,and true..
just like the statues of knights that would die for their school..
It's sad the way you show, very graphically and beautifully for all it's horror the school we all love so well. Harry hasn't seen it since his 6th year and to have it be all that way ... that's sad. You show it so well.
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There was Luna swaying back and forth..
For the killing curse missed her only by a few inches.
She held out her wand..
and bellowed some words that sent a Death Eater knocking to the ground..
No mercy should be shown tonight..
...
Dean and Seamus each dueling thier own Death Eater...
While Neville was planting some angry mandrakes up against the wall...
for if any Death Eater passes along..
they are going to get a very loud yell coming from the wall..
and knock them fainted on the ground..
Here, well what can I say? You give us a glimpse into the DA. Harry's friends are fighting for him alongside him and you show it so well in these tiny fragments of scene, what poetry can't afford to do is waste loads of pages on a character or a scene and you say it so well in a few words. It's ... well it's wow.
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Then the most terrifying site I have seen..
Greyback and Lupin clawing and biting into each others red flesh..
As I saw my loyal friends dueling themselves three Death Eaters at a time..
Honestly, the most terrifying thing I would have thought would have been Mrs. Weasley taking on Bellatrix but that's just my opinion ...
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Then a thought came to me..
Ron.......
Hermione.....
They have been here for me..
Till this...
My very end...,
And you didn't forget the heroes best mates and his greatest allies, but I have to criticize and please don't take it the wrong way, that they should have merited more than just a simple thought ... They've been with Harry all the time, surely he would have thought more about them at the end, no?
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And then a teardrop fell to the ground I just couldnt help it..
The memories of my friends will be so close to my heart...
That is beautiful.
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and I asked the most childish question to him..
"Does it hurt,.....to die?"
But it wasnt him that anwsered it was my loving godfather that said"It is very quick and painless.."
I missed him..
I missed all of them..
That was poignant ... very touching and sweetly sad. I like bittersweetness so this chord strikes the right note for me ...
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"Will you stay with me?"
My mom looked at me with tears in her eyes..
and said..
"To the very end.."
The leaves were pushing against my feet..
nearer and nearer im walking to my end..
Your poem reminds me of the last chapters so well. Brilliantly.
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Voldemort shall be mortal again when he takes my own life away..
He raised his wand and said,"Avada Kedavra"
And through my circle glasses the light in my eyes simply went away.........
"I Open At The Close..."
And of course, the price that must be paid ... for every life is bought with something ... as is every death. Brilliant. *fires the cannons for this poem* I think you should post this poem in the DA thread, it features the DA characters and it is quite beautiful. That's my own opinion.
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Hoped you liked it!
To say I liked it is an understatement and I wish I could use it in one of my fics it's so brilliant. I look forward to reading more of your poems Xavier but, don't forget your fic, some of us like that too. You're a brilliant writer keep it up.
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x11 
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Thanks so much Marcy!
Where'd you go Xavier? I missed you! =(
I've got a degree in English & Self-Importance so you know all my statements r valid 
Don't let your mome raths grabe out use the vorpal sword it's heroic! At a store nea 
Thank you for that marvelous intro Xavier ... and now for my critique of your latest poem, per your request ... I usually try to catch up first but since you asked so nicely 
just sayin' Neways. They've decided to come out of the dark ... nice use of the dark/light motif 
) Poor Neville. 
