hahahah!!!!! I'm still laughing. Wow. I feel completely unfunny. I did that same dare...except the mods haven't checked it yet so u can't read it...yet. And it isn't half as funny as that. hahaha!!!!! That was good though. Really good!!!!! :flowersmile: (have a Fluer Delacour)

Why did you have to write so well? Now mine will look crap, next to yours.

Your just too darn clever! > :ermsmile: :wacko:

HAHAHAHAHA :breath: HAHAHAHAHAHA oh my, that was sooo funny!!! I had to shut my door because I was laughing so hard!! Great work!




Jasmine

Things I forgot: The dare -

1) The story must be set in Marauders erra.
2) Snape must make soup in his cauldron and lose house points for this.
3) Lilly must say "Chocolate!? Not again..."
4) Remus' "condition" must be discovered by his friends.
5) Sirius must say, "And if I were a sock, I'd be wool."
And lastly... someone must begin to sing Christmas carols.


You know what... no one sang Christmas carols! So...

"Deck the halls with bows of holly..." the whole cast sings and the author groans because its only stinking NOVEMBER! Yes...

(p.s. just noticed I did include xmas carols... I lied. sorry)

Lotus's dare... part 1 of 2 - you missed it. This was posted on Snape is my man for about a minute, because I'm dumb.

Something very bad happened on account of Celestina Warbeck's visit (for the uninitiated, that was about 3 chapters ago). Dumbledore was bitten... by the performance art bug. Seeing Celestina, who was a former Hufflepuff who rarely attended classes and did very poorly on her OWLS, on the stage surrounded by glowing faces but rare and excitable thoughts of lights and music and dancing and lots and lots of stage makeup. He even went so far as to have huge red velvet curtains with golden tassels installed to open and close around the dais.

The student body didn't have an inkling of Dumbledore's obsession until audition sheets appeared in each Common Room. Apparently, Dumbledore was jumping in with both feet and dragging all the Heads of Houses with him kicking and screaming. Although, McGonagal would never kick and scream, she'd just stare you down with her mouth in a tight line. And Snape would probably poison you or at least glower, which is really just like a very deadly pout. Apparently, only Flitwick and Sprout were kicking and screaming. And both of them actually really liked the idea of a Hogwarts drama program. I retract the kicking and screaming. There was no kicking and screaming.

Each house was doing something different, and almost no one was happy. The Muggle borns were thinking that they hoped they had escaped from mandatory class plays when they entered the wizarding world. Everyone else was just perplexed. What was a thespian? Did they want to be one?

The first group to perform was the Hufflepuffs who decided to do an exciting and quite daring rendition of "Dr. Doolittle" (the author would like to point out that this was both a book and an old musical before Eddie Murphy was BORN). I say daring because the only animals that could be found to fill the stage were various familiars (rats, bats, and owls... oh my! OH! FORESHADOWING!) and some random animals Hagrid rounded up.

Of course, THAT was a mistake, because Hagrid brought several pinching and biting creatures and a blast ended skrewt that set the curtain on fire. For the next rehearsal, Sprout begged Dumbledore to help them out. When they showed up for rehearsal, he was seen with 3 cats, a donkey, and 12 pineapples. Somehow, the show was a rousing success, but only because the Ernie McMillan had an amazingly good voice and the donkey tried to eat Hannah Abbot.

Next to perform were the Ravenclaws, who were much too intellectual to do a simple play or musical. Flitwick, who can be quite persuasive the little devil, talked them into doing a talent show. Ginny and Harry got quite a kick out of seeing Michael Corner and Cho sing a passable version of "I've Got You Babe." When I say passable, I mean passable like a kidney stone. Somehow, through all the pain, you survive.

There was a high point to this amazing spectacle. First, it should be noted that while many of the Ravenclaws are quite intelligent, sometimes they do things that are quite stupid. For instance, a few of the first years got together and decided that they would do some sort of a circus act. While one kid, the only one with any nimbleness, rolled in somersaults around the stage, the other two juggled a stack of coconuts with a small charm they learned from a library book (they are Ravenclaws, afterall). The mistake, of course, was that they were trying to do too much at once. The somersaulting child, growing quite dizzy, rolled right into the two juggling coconuts. Those two and their pile of coconuts went rolling into the crowd, and one of the kids gave a great, "Oof," and shot a random hex. Somehow, that hex hit half the school. I don't understand the physics of these things, but it just did.

Without warning, the afflicted half of the school, namely the Slytherins and the Hufflepuffs, jumped from their seats and began to sing, "Walk Like an Egyptian." There were even hand motions!

"What surprises me more than the song," Ron informed Harry and Hermione as they ate the fallen coconuts, "is that they all know the words."

Hermione rolled her eyes, "I think that's part of the spell." Meanwhile, over and yon, Seamus and Dean began to roll around on the floor shouting, "Mine! Mine!"

The last coconut tumbled from their grasp and settled at Ginny's feet. As they rolled, she picked it up and ate it.

lol! cass why did u do that... oh funny funny!

yeah, I saw it on snape is my man....don't worry bout it....neway...HHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHEHHEHEHEHEHHEEEEEEEE EHHHAAAAAAAAAOHOOHHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHHUHUHUHUHUHHHHEHH EHHEHEHEH HAHHHAHAHHAHAHAHA........... that was funny. :flowersmile:

*slinks in* are the chickens ok? *evil pose* mwahahaha

Hahaha, Very inventive Cass. Can't wait for the next part.

PS. Shhh... I'm sorry about the chickens.

For all who are concerned... the chickens are doing well. They say, "Bawk!"

Next came the Slytherin presentation. After much thought, the decision was made that the only ACCEPTABLE play for proper purebloods to do would be "The Wizard of Oz." After all, it at least had a wizard in it. Apparently, there were several Death Eater-y witches as well. The house elves were forced to play munchkins and were frighteningly good in their musical numbers.

Draco threw a fit and demanded they let him be the Great and Powerful Oz, despite the fact that he was told no several times as well as explained the basic premise behind the whole "man behind the curtain" thingy. Eventually, to avoid conflict, Snape played the wizard and Draco played a very sour-faced tin man. When he sang about his need for a heart, the entire room tittered. Of course, they laughed out right at Goyle's "If I only had a brain..." and Ron needed to leave the room when they saw Crabbe in his flying monkey costume.

Near the end of the show, Snape suddenly discovered that he was VERY allergic to his stage makeup. Despite the dramatic moment (Mildred Bulstrode had just melted into a puddle... it took her 8 minutes to die), he leapt off the stage, ran down the aisle and disappeared through the Great Hall doors. It was discovered later that he didn't stop moving until he hit the lake - the same lake that Gryffindors refused to approach for the next three months due to Snape-cooties.

The last group to perform was the Gryffindors. Initially, the problem was Harry. How in the world could they go on stage without their very own superstar? Yet, Harry refused. He didn't want to be the center of attention any more than necessary (and he had serious, vomit-inducing stage fright. Ew... that grossed me out).

He was talked into it by Ron, who had sudden dreams of costumed stardom (must also have been bitten by the dangerous drama bug). Ron showed Harry a picture of his mother, dressed in a hula skirt and coconut bra and dancing the hula. After the initial horror of seeing his mother in a hula skirt - and Ron did NOT help by saying she looked hot - Harry decided that there must be drama blood in his veins. He agreed to be in the play.

The Gryffs decided to let McGonagal chose what their show would be, based on the fact that they had to live with her for the next few years and it wouldn't do to make her mad. Who knew that McGonagal was a closet Shakespeare fan? They ended up doing exerpts from all of his plays. All of them. All. The boys all ended up in long tunics and tights, which they hated. Except for Neville... he found the tights to be very flattering. The girls, of course, all loved their beautiful, long dresses - once they were allowed to be in the play at all. In the spirit of Shakespeare, our lovely Minerva wanted an all male cast as dear "William" would have needed. That idea was gently but firmly vetoed.

The performances went well, although Ron matched Mildred Bulstrode for longest and most dramatic death scene. Ginny tripped and tore her dress. Neville came in before his cue... six times. Each time he waved and said, "Right-o." Hermione performed hers with a perfect British accent (that was a joke... get it?). Harry kept trying to fall on his sword and put an end to the long and drawn out show.

Finally, the curtain went down and the clapping died. The students hoped Dumbledore's bug had died with it. They were correct. The next day, the red curtain came down and things settled back into normal.

Until the notices went up - "Mandatory Synchronized Swimming Class..."

That was soooo hilarious, it's not funny. Well it is, but......umm, you know what I mean.

OMG! That cracked me up. Did you know that I sing, or hum that, like once a week.
"I would while away the hours......" :whisle:

got it, got it....perdy dang funny if u ask me!!! it was great!!! :flowersmile:

*blink* Synchronized swimming? *cracks up* Tell the chickens I say
"cluck" back... SEVERUS as the Wiz? "pay no attention..." *Cracks up again* AHH! The mental image!

lol! the drama bug oh gosh that was funny! good job we need new dares now...

Requirements:

*Snape for some reason takes a bath in the lake.
*Dumbledore is caught with 3 cats, a donkey, and 12 pineapples in the great hall.
*Lilly Potter makes an appearance wearing a Hulla skirt and coconut bra.
*Half the school sings, "Walk like an egyptian".
*And two people have an argument over the last coconut.
*Plus all the main characters must appear in a costume, for some amount of time.


I'm scouting for a new dare...

And so it begins...

There was a shop in Diagon Alley, squeezed between a second-hand robes shop and Ollivander's. It was an obscure sort of shop, nothing of great interest in the windows and a small sign with three faded red W's swinging above the door. It somehow managed to do a brisk trade, bringing people of all ages but especially children through the dark wooden door.

Now, though, the shop was closed, a sign blinking in the window saying, "Will return in 10 minutes, 16 seconds," and counting down. Inside the store, two young men with brilliantly colored red hair ate tuna sandwiches and brainstormed about possible jokes to add to their stock.

"You know what I think," Fred said with a mouth full of tuna.

"I think..." George interrupted. "You need to chew first; talk later."

Fred swallowed and continued, although he glared at his twin. "Anyway, I was thinking that we have some products that we can start adding to the store, but first, we really need to find a way to test them."

George rolled his eyes. "You want to test things on paying customers?"

"No way!" Fred exclaimed. "I just think now is the perfect time to pay a visit to our alma mater."

George nodded slowly. "Good idea. Only... I think it's only an alma mater if you actually graduate."
***
The twins arrived on a Friday afternoon, just after classes. Of course, the Gryffindors threw them a party, although their siblings and Hermione regarded them with some suspicion. "You just decided to visit?" Ginny asked and rolled her eyes.

It was during the party that they tested their first product. It was actually a two-pronged attack. First, Fred slipped out the portrait hole while George was shooting off some of their new and improved fireworks-for-small-spaces. No one even noticed his disappearance and reappearance. Then, Fred led everyone in a rousing rendition of Weasley is Our King, introducing his new and improved verses that cannot be repeated here. George produced a dish of lollipops and set them near the punch. They gave each other an imperceptible nod.

The next day, the students awoke as usual and made their way down to the Great Hall for a late breakfast. Although it took the sleepy children a while to notice, they were surprised to see that there were no teachers sitting at the head table. Never, in all their time at Hogwarts, had there been a time when they were without some sort of supervision.

"Do you think it's a trick?" Harry whispered, his eyes darting suspiciously around the Great Hall.

"Yeah, Harry," Ginny said sarcastically. "I'm so sure that all the professors are stuffed in a broom closet somewhere, just waiting for you to break a rule. Sounds normal and rational to me..."

Hermione began to use her depressingly and tediously logical mind. "Look, why don't we just go look for the professors? Ron, go find Snape. Ginny, find Flitwick. Harry, find Trelawney. And I'll find McGonagal."

They all agreed, but as soon as Hermione disappeared out the door, the boys decided they wanted to have nothing to do with Snape or McGonagall and went to find Dumbledore and Hagrid instead.

Ron raced outside and over to Hagrid's cabin, pounding on the cabin door as he caught his breath. When there was no answer, he went around to the back, looking to see if Hagrid was gardening. Instead, what he found was a blast-ended skrewt tied to the fence and trying to blast through the fence and cut his rope with his stinger at the same time.

Ron was bored with looking already, so he plopped himself down on the fence to watch the skrewt, which kept stabbing its own leg. He hoped it would poison itself and die and he would get to see it. While he waited, he pulled out a lollipop from the party the night before. What he didn't know was that these special candies were known as luvipops (love-e-pops) by their creators, Gred and Feorge.

"You know," Ron said although no one was there because the author wanted all the readers to know what was going on in his little red head. "I've never noticed how attractive skrewts are. They have this amazing beauty and grace. I... I just... I think I'm in love!" Watching the skrewt struggle to free itself, Ron was heartbroken at its plight. "My beloved shall NOT be tied to the fence! I'll save you!"

He jumped down and ran across the giant pumpkin patch to the fence where the skrewt was tied. Just as he was reaching the skrewt, some unseen force grabbed Ron by his robe and picked him up. He was hanging midair, and nothing seemed to have a hold of him. It was quite amusing if you were there... but you aren't... so just read on.

While some unseen thingymabobber held onto Ron's robes as he tried unsuccessfully to save his beloved, Harry was running through the castle halls toward Dumbledore's office. He kept hoping he'd run into a professor who would tell him exactly what was going on, but the only people he passed were students. Granted, all the Gryffindors he passed were acting very strangely. Colin and Dennis Creevey were fighting over a picture of their mother and arguing about who loved her the best. Seamus was stalking Lavender, who carried a Teen Witch magazine she kept caressing lovingly. Neville was found waving his wand at Trevor trying to turn him into "the girl I know you can be." Trevor was only pink and purple and singing the theme song to Sailor Moon... but he was not a girl. At the door to Dumbledore's office, Harry raced through all the types of magical candy he could think of. Then he moved on to Muggle candy, although he didn't have nearly as much experience with those.

Finally, the password was Goobers. Apparently, Dumbledore had developed a strong liking for peanuts. However, when Harry reached his office, there was no one there except Fawkes.

"Ergh," Harry shouted. "This is ridiculous! Where are all the professors!?" He addressed the flaming bird. "Fawkes, I can't find the professors."

Suddenly, Harry heard a throat clearing and turned to see Dumbledore standing there, his eyes twinkling as if he hadn't just been missing for half a day. He was also eating honey roasted peanuts straight from a can.

"It appears, Mr. Potter, that we have been the subjects of a prank. Something the teachers ate caused them to be invisible to the student body. I've also noticed that perhaps something the Gryffindors ate is causing them to be... attracted strangely. Would you happen to know where Mr. Fred and George Weasley are at this time?"

Far away, back in a little shop in Diagon Alley, two mischievious redheads were putting new stock on their shelves.

Cool beans, cool beans!!! That was awsome!!! Very very funny!!! hehehehehehehe!!! What happened to the chickens? Huh? I miss them... :unsure: More dares soon k? :flowersmile:

lol! ahh my fred and george :wub: u did them good cass! lol! that was funny!

Here's the dare:

1.Ron must fall in love with a skrewt.
2. fred and george make a apperance a funny one...
3. some how there are no teachers
4. a referance to sailormoon... hehe
5. dumbledore must have a sudden likeing for peanuts....


Please respond so that I can feel good about myself. Otherwise, I'll be forced to kick you with pointy shoes!

AAAAAAAAHH! Pointy shoes, where?!?

Hmmm, maybe Fred could give me one of those lollipops, then I can give it to Orlando. :wub:
Although, i'm sure once he see's me, he wont need it.

i already posted in here u....hehe...now where r those poity shoes *runs off* :adminchase:

*dances in evilness* CASS! CASS! GO CASS! *steals pointy shoes* Now whatchya goanna do? Huh? *runs off, cackling* MWAHAHAHA!!

teeheee..... ..EVIL!!!!

I'm proud of... me! For finally being able to do it all in one!

"I think," said Pansy Parkinson, her little pug face creased in thought, "that we should just put it to a vote."

"A what?" came the cry from several Slytherins crowded into the Common Room.

"A vote. It's like this thing where everyone says what they want and the group that is bigger gets their way..." Pansy tried to explain. "I learned about it on Snitchseeker..." she trailed off, because that was her big secret.

"We don't all get our way..." whined some random Slyth girl. Draco rolled his eyes from his position of prominence on the couch. And they thought that Hufflepuff had all the duffers.

"What are we voting for?" an unidentified voice was heard because the author needed to introduce the plot already!

Pansy sighed, it wasn't like this when they voted on good old Snitchseeker... she was really good at sighing, being the resident drama queen. "We're voting on whether we should kick Draco out of the house because... (insert pause because the author is still working on a plausible reason. Afterall, what's a Snitchseeker dare without plausibility?) he's been seen fraternizing with Gryffindors."

Draco exploded, "What the (the author censors him because of Snitchseeker rules and because Lotus and Zymurgy would kick her with her own pointy shoes). It isn't my fault that I was assigned a Gryff as my partner for Potions!"

"Was that a term of endearment?" Blaise Zabini, who is either a male or a female but definitely one of these two choices, said. "Gryff? Awfully friendly."

"I would rather be kicked out of this pathetic house than be forced to spend another MOMENT with quacks like you!"

"So... no vote then?" Pansy pouted, and Crabbe and Goyle were forced to toss their former leader out the door. They changed the password so he couldn't get back in... it was now Snitchseeker because the author needed to use it one more time.

***
During dinner later that same day, the Great Hall fell silent as they spotted Draco Malfoy trying to find a seat at the Ravenclaw table. After several cold stares from each table, Draco grabbed a plate and settled on the floor. He was beginning to regret his rashness and planning what he could do to earn his way back into his house. Well... they thought he was friends with the Gryffindors? He could just go to great lengths to prove that wrong.

"Longbottom!" Malfoy's voice was as warm as he could make it... just above the temperature of ice cream. Mmm... ice cream. "Hey, partner, when do you want to meet for our potions project?" Malfoy attempted something like a smile, but it really just looked like someone was pinching him.

Neville stuttered his way through an answer. When they met in the library later that evening, Draco tried his hardest to earn Neville's trust, but Neville had 6 years too many with the EVILNESS that was the true Draco Malfoy.

"Um... Draco... have you eaten any strange candy lately? Perhaps a lollipop?" Neville recalled the author's last fic on Snitchseeker (author's multiple personalities point out that she didn't need to mention Snitchseeker anymore and now is just showing off) which involved the Luvipops.

"Yeah, got one last time the Weasely twins visited. Why do you ask?" Neville ran screaming from the room. He sounded remarkably like a woman. Realizing he'd failed to gain Neville's trust to later exploit, Malfoy decided on a better plan... torment the Weasely family - quintessential Gryffs.

The next day, the school was suddenly overrun with red-furred weasels that flashed golden "Weasely" letters and had miniature shabby robes on. There were two results from this fic: one, Draco was let back into Slytherin... which he really regretted about five minutes into. Two, Neville decided that the best place to be until the lollipop wore off would be a tropical island. Thus, he signed up for Survivor and won a million dollars. That kid is a lot more devious than you would think.

lol! u show off lol! kidding! To the batcave*runs off and hides in her cave*hehehe