Caretakers and Libraries
Theme # 60: Joke


Filch’s company is very dry. At times, I begin to feel I made a mistake in accepting all those flattering words of his. He makes me crankier than ever!

“Madam Pince, could I please have that book –?”

Times were, when a student asked me that, I acted the good librarian and handed it over with ease. Now, I snap, “Lower your voice, boy, it’s a Library, for Heaven’s sake!”

That’s because my mind is on Filch. And the way he laughs, all dryly, not getting my joke at all, before telling me how amazing my sense of humour is.

If Only Men Would Listen
Theme # 47: Portkey


“Xeno, please!”

Xenophilius Lovegood, my husband, looks up at me and sighs. “Come on, love, floo powder isn’t that bad.”

“Yes, it is,” I insist. I know it is not really very terrible, but I always manage to end up in the wrong place, somehow, when using it. “Can’t we use a portkey, Xeno?”

He grimaces, and then tries to explain. “We have to be quick, honey. And we don’t have an authorized portkey, either.”


Ten minutes later, I emerge out of the fireplace, my clothes dusty and coughing loudly. Why does Xeno never listen to me?

Sighs and Giggles, All in One Drabble
Theme # 45: Torch


“Druella?”

This is a normal evening at Cygnus Black’s manor. I am dressed dancing myself crazy when Cygnus appears, lighting a few more torches and greeting people here and there.

“Yes, Cyg?” I ask as he holds me.

“I love you, you know,” he tells me fondly.

“I know,” I giggle.

“Oey, Cyg, come here, the –” a voice floats up to us and, without so much as an apology, Cygnus has left with the newcomer to attend to business as usual. I sigh, leaning against the wall, and wondering what makes me think I really am his Miss Right.

Food. And Lizards.
Theme # 50: Boggart


I have finally found out what Vincent’s boggart is: A lizard eating up all the food in the world, and leaving nothing for him.

“Not an ordinary lizard,” Vincent says. “It’s is poisonous, I’m telling you.”

When I first started dating Vincent, all my friends told me the same thing. “He can only think about two things, Vincent Crabbe: Food. And water.”

Of course, I didn’t believe them. For all his faults, he was a very caring guy. I still don’t believe them, because now I know what the only two things he can think about are:

Food. And lizards.

All Good Things
Theme # 40: Spell


I know what they say: Love is just a four letter word for a death eater. Wrong. I have been one for a while, now, and I love Amycus Carrow.

The Carrows – The very name spells fear in the hearts of hundreds. I make up a good portion of the Carrows, and I am very proud of it. I am also very proud of my husband. Yes, very extremely so.

It can be difficult, cancelling plans for the night because the Dark Lord assigns Amycus something in the middle of the night. But all good things have their drawbacks, see.

Percy, Showers, and More
Theme # 67: Quell


Ah, life is good. When you’re Penelope Clearwater, you feel that way.

I have… pretty much everything. Outstanding grades, ten O.W.Ls I can proudly flaunt whenever I want to, a badge that reads ‘Head girl,’ pretty, streaming curls everyone – myself included – adores to death, the cutest owl, courtesy my mother, lots of money to spend on chocolate and in Hogsmeade. And, of recently, I also have a certain redhead: Percy Weasley.

It’s wonderful, being his Miss Right. Very wonderful. But when you realize Percy singing in the shower might quell much of your sleep in future life: Not so much.

Wands: Always Trouble
Theme # 19: Wand


“Dru, hurry up. We have to get Dromeda her first wand, remember?”

I wake up, rubbing my eyes. It is a Sunday, and I usually sleep late on Sundays. Cygnus is already wide awake, dressed – Andromeda Black, our middle daughter, is finally eleven, and needs her first wand.

“Can’t we go tomorrow, Cyg?” I yawn.

Cygnus shakes his head. “No. You know I’ll be at work. I told you I wanted to go yesterday: you should have gotten up early.”

With an effort, I force myself to rise. The trouble with Cygnus Black, you see, is that he’s too punctual.

Socks with Allergies
Theme # 96: Sock


Rolf Scamander is a sweet guy. We have been out a few times, as friends. Ginny thinks it is very likely we will end up together. “You and Rolf are very cute,” she says.

Last week, Rolf bought me a nice pack of presents. It was a collection of hand-made objects, all sewn out of a little, leafy plant we discovered on one of our trips together. There was this wide-brimmed hat, and a pair of socks.

I do not think Rolf knows that I am allergic to the plant, though. I must let him know, one of these days.

One Antler-ed Tales
Theme # 78: Author’s Choice


A wrong in being George Weasley’s Miss Right, you ask me?

None, I would say.

To say the least, he’s perfect. I love the way he calls me ‘Angie,’ instead of ‘Angelina,’ I love the way he gently slips his arm around my waist, I love the way he jokes until I find myself rolling on the floor in laughter, and I love the way he climbs his broom – Yes, I love everything about him.

Well, I admit it’s not funny when you sprout one antler after accidentally testing one of his ‘inventions,’ but I guess I could make concessions.

Who’d Want More?
Theme # 57: Gape


My name is Melania MacMillan, and I have now been married to Arcturus Black for two years. We have a grand house, a magnificent way of living and, since the past four months, a little son whom we have named Orion.

People gape at all the luxuries we have. Sometimes, they also ask me if I could ask more of life. I can not: I am fully content with my lot. For me, life is perfect. Of course, ours was an arranged marriage and, much as I love Arcturus, I can not help wishing we had courted before our wedding!

Little Talks & Great Delights
Theme # 53: Chase


“Isn’t he cute, Sep?”

Septimus Weasley looked up from his newspaper, at our three year old son who was now chasing our ginger cat all over the floor. He smiled, beckoning the boy closer, who obeyed mirthfully.

“Now, now, hon, don’t you hurt the cat.”

“Clever boy, Cedrella; he has many of your qualities,” he remarked to me later that day, and I blushed with pleasure. Septimus Weasley is so sweet! It was the most amazing day of my life, our wedding.

– Incidentally, it was also the day I was blasted off the Black family tree for marrying a blood-traitor.

The Charm of Charm!
Theme # 12: Charms


Hello. You may know me already. My name is Isla – Isla former Black, Isla current Hitchens.

A lot of people ask me why I married Bob Hitchens – a muggle – when I stood nothing to gain. I have been disowned, and can no longer mingle with the ‘high and mighty’ of the Blacks. Bob is not an amazingly rich fellow, either: we live fairly well, but he has no wealth of the Black sort.

The reason is simple: I love him, and he charms me. Indeed, I do not care at all what the wrongs in being his Miss Right are.

Drawbacks of Being a Black by Marraige
Theme # 54: Dare


Irma Crabbe Black. That is me. Head of the Department for Magical Games and Sports at the London-based Ministry of Magic, and wife of Pollux Black. Having married Pollux, I have come into the natura inheritance of many things Black: luxury, a happy, pureblood life.

This does not mean, however, that being a Black does not have its solemn disadvantages. I have to be very careful, very careful indeed, about what I speak and how I act, whom I challenge, and whom I dare. Rumours spread quickly when you are a Black, you see.

Ah, the drawbacks of marrying Pollux!

Fights & Fun & Further Fights
Theme # 55: Egg on


“Do not egg me on, Ronald Weasley!”

It is that time again: Ron’s ears turn red, and we plunge, headfirst, into our weekly fight. It seems we can not spend more than six days without a fight.

Sometimes, not even five.

“You, Hermione Granger –” Ron begins loudly.

Our voices escalate and, once we have fought and fought and fought and, finally, made up all over again as if nothing had happened in the first place, I check a sigh: Why can’t Ron and I live without fighting?

Though you have to admit – it’s fun.

Did I mention only afterwards?

A Miss Right for Many, Indeed!
Theme # 58: Hoot


“That boy smiled at you, Lavender.”

I turn around as Parvati whispers this into my ear, and glance behind us: A tall Ravenclaw stands there, and he smiles again as I look his way. My lips curve, and I colour on purpose, faintly but flatteringly, waving to him. One of his friends whistles, and another hoots. With elegant steps, I turn my back on them and disappear into the castle.

I meet Ron in the hallway, and we snog for five minutes. Very wonderful, being Miss Right for many, all at once, but I begin to forget their names, sometimes!

Breakfast Time Fights
Theme # 56: Fight


“Astoria Greengrass Malfoy!” Draco half screamed up the staircase, seemingly ready to fight.

“Yes, Draco?” I asked, peering down, makeup kit in hand.

“I thought you were giving Scorpius breakfast! Now he’s spilled milk and food all over the floor, and you’re busy with your makeup. Knock Knock, Tori, there’s a son who needs you here. Who’s going to clean all of this, now?”

I raised an eyebrow. “You’re a wizard, aren’t you, Draco? And, last time I checked, we had a house elf.”

“Oh.” Face falling, Draco looked rather embarrassed. I shook my head, turning back to my makeup.

To Say or Not to Say
Theme # 62: Lope


Remus lopes like a wolf, sometimes. When I tell him this, he smiles in a humoured way. “But of course,” he says.

He does not take such remarks this happily when not in a pleasant mood, though. Friday night, Remus in a temper:

“Let’s go out to the movies, Rem.”

“You know I don’t want to, Dora.”

“You lope like a wolf, you know, Remmy.”

“DORA!”

See! And then mother says I’m supposed to know when to say what, and when not to. Such difficulties, in the path of true love, in the path of Remus Lupin’s only Miss Right!

The Chickens at the Burrow
Theme # 63: Mooch


People say there never was a couple luckier than us. I often hear their comments.

“That boy is dashing, has an excellent job, excellent contacts. She’s amazingly pretty, and she comes of a high family. Purebloods, both of them. How lucky!”

I agree. Not because Bill and I are handsome, or well-off, but because we love each other. When we mooch about the village near his home, together, and he talks to me and laughs with me: Wonderful.

When he tells me has to return to the Burrow and feed the chickens, however, I can not help being inwardly offended!

And Nothing Less
Theme # 64: Nap


Scorpius is an exciting person to have as a boyfriend.

Always, he has great tales to tell. Of magic and mystery, each more thrilling than the previous. I can sit by him for hours, half napping in his lap, adoring the sound of his voice. Like warm sunshine in cold. Like cold water on a hot, summer’s day.

We have our little world of dreams, and our little plans. There is a drawback, though: His name – the name of Malfoy – goes against him, despite his pleasant personality.

I do not care. For me, Scorpius is my life, and nothing less.

Nurturing Dreams Through Endlessness
Theme # 65: Ooze


There were screams as Draco stumbled backwards, panting. Blood oozed down his lip, and he looked a sight. All else forgotten, I raced towards him.

"GINNY, NO!"

Someone caught me, threw me sideways. Collapsing into a wall, I looked up to see Hermione. "There was a curse coming your way!" she shouted as battle raged. "And - Gin, DUCK!"

I ducked, just in time, but I did not care for myself, anymore. I knew Draco was out there, in the heat of the battle, and I could only sob.

How difficult it is, nurturing dreams for a person so endangered!

Into the Beyond
Theme # 66: Pace


Did you ask why I am pacing up and down this hallway? Well, I am in the beyond. They call my Professor Trelawney.

Some are surprised to learn that I have dated – at least until I remained in my twenties. After all, I was quite a pretty lady, back then – which, of course, does not imply that I am not so still.

Morgan Rights, one of my boyfriends, seemed very much my Mr. Right at seventeen years of age. He was handsome, but it was trouble, being his Miss Right, much trouble indeed:

– He could never see into the beyond.

A [Sceptical] Hint of Romance
Theme # 69: Slap


That David Mountbatton! The idiot had the nerve to suggest I wore my pretty cardigans in a useless effort to attract more male company at the Ministry!

I could have slapped him had dignity not prevented it.

I am Dolores Umbridge, by the way. And who says I do not have boyfriends? I had one at Hogwarts. A pretty good one, too! It was such fun, being his Miss Right.

Of course, it turned out in the end that he had been dared by his friends to date me but, honestly, who says I have never had a darn boyfriend?

Plants and Dreams: The Couple Odd
Theme # 68: Roar


“Um, nice hat there, Luna.”

Neville sounds a little nervous. I look up at him and, with a serene smile, I raise my hand to touch my pretty hat. The lion perched atop it opens its mouth, letting out a huge roar. Neville takes a quick step back.

“Good, isn’t it?” I ask happily.

“Um, yes,” Neville says, as we find a place in the stands to sit together. I hold his hand, feeling pretty happy. Only, I would have been happier if he had commented on how nice my new, cucumber earrings look. Neville can be so forgetful, sometimes!

The Wrong in the Right
Theme # 51: Act


I wish James was not so obsessed about how good he is. He knows he is excellent in just about everything and, even though he has never flaunted it in front of me, I know he feels that way.

Especially when he acts the idiot, and hexes Severus.

Does he think I’m not looking? Well, even with four eyes to his credit, James Potter has pretty weak vision! Because, sometimes, I’m standing right by the lake, and Sirius has to inform him of my presence.

And yes, I get offended. I mean, he should have his eyes glued to me!

Love: The Twist and the Turn
Theme # 79: Author’s Choice


I look up as Buckbeak lands in the distance. They call him Witherwings now, but that is not his genuine name. I have known him for three days and – Wait! Have I introduced myself? No? How wrong!

My name is Fortunella, and I am one of the new, female hippogriffs Hagrid has brought to Hogwarts. Here, I have met Witherwings, who is on a secret visit to his favourite gamekeeper.

I must say, I really like Witherwings. It would have been even better if his coat was a darker shade but, all the same, his company is very charming, indeed.