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100 Mischievous Drabbles for Peeves by Jess - Sa13+ Banner made by the awesome Pigemi at Sirius' Lothlorien Paradise These one hundred drabbles are all about Peeves, that mischievous poltergeist whom we've all grown to both love and hate throughout the series. The drabbles are in no particular time, but just meant to be enjoyable to read and slightly insane too at times. :upside: Also, if you want a drabble dedicated to you, then PM me with your number selection and that drabble shall be yours. <3 2 - Muggle Studies It was the second lesson of the new school year, and Charity Burbage was teaching a lesson about the muggle fairy tales. As if muggle studies weren’t interesting enough, it was about to get better. A faint zooming was growing louder, until a water balloon hit the back of the professor’s head and soaked her robes. Peeves the Poltergeist followed the water balloon entering through the chalkboard, “Try and catch me if you can!” He zoomed around the muggle studies classroom, chucking water balloons at random students. The students retaliated by casting ‘aguamenti’ at Peeves, but instead soaking the entire room. |
25 - Sorting Hat Poltergeists were finally going to be allowed to attend Hogwarts, as students. Peeves was both thrilled and nervous when he received his letter. After torturing students for years, he was finally going to be one of them. He was going to be sorted. In the brief moment before his name was called, he remembered the time he took advise from the wretched students. It was Fred and George Weasley and now he was to do their farewell bidding, ‘Give her hell from us, Peeves.’ And with that, the sorting hat was placed on his head. Barely a moment later, “Slytherin!” |
26 - Quill Monday. It was raining. In a muggle world, kids might find all kinds of indoor games to goof around and pass the time; wizarding students aren’t much different. Peeves is at his best on raining days – or should we say worst. “Bombs away!” he cackled, dropping several dungbombs over the heads of students emerging from the great hall. Students shrieked, especially girls, as they ran outside despite the rain. Professors told Peeves to stop and it wasn’t funny. Peeves didn’t stop. Not until the Bloody Baron threatened to stick a quill through his skull. A cold hard, feathery quill. |
27 - Owl Peeves was wandering the halls like usual, looking for his daily fill of mischief. What shall he do to those ickle firsties today? He wondered casually, resting on one of the statues near the tall tower leading to the owlery. The squawking from just one floor up was making his head pound, and unable to think. Then, something fell on his head. Small, hard and slightly smelly. Owl droppings? It seemed one of the owls had been improperly re-caged. Hopping off his seat, Peeves bounded the stairs to “clean” the cages, collecting as many droppings as possible. Perfect; owl droppings for dinner! |
28 - Timeturner 10 seconds until we all go back. At least that’s what the kwikspell book said that Monsieur Filch had lying open on his desk. Peeves was no expert with this magic stuff, but going back sounded exciting. He would maybe get to see his family and where he came from. Well of course, he knew that, but no one else did. Nor were they going to find out anytime soon… Little did Peeves know what that statement in the book referred to. For he’ll be waiting until he gets his hands on a timeturner. Three turns and ten seconds is all the timeturner needs. |
29 - Pensieve Late one afternoon, Peeves found himself in yet another sticky situation. The mischievous poltergeist was exploring the headmaster’s office for fun – perhaps moreso than torturing the wittle firsties. Trouble came though when he stumbled upon the shallow stone basin inside the black cabinet. Quite intrigued by the silvery, cloud-like substance, Peeves looked closer. Too close… Before he could stop himself, Peeves was immersed into the memories of the Headmaster. Memories that felt so alive and real – as though the poltergeist was there himself. Ones that should not have been seen by anyone – but they were – in the pensieve. |
30 - Feast It was that time of year everyone loves: the Halloween Feast. Joyful noises could be heard throughout the Great Hall and would continue well into the night. Halloween also happened to be one of the best nights for mischief and pranks. Early on in the surreptitious evening, just as the students begun filtering from the Great Hall, Peeves was lurking above on the first floor awaiting his potential victims. Without another thought as to the consequences, the poltergeist began chucking balloons filled with hot cheese. “Ickle Students smell like cheese!” Peeves chanted with laughter at his own small feast. |
92 - Chocolate Still wearing his Spiderman pajamas, Peeves really didn’t see too much of a point to dressing today of all days. It was possibly the worst day of mankind; at least for the eyes of the mischievous poltergeist. For Merlin’s sake, who would dare ask a goofball to the annual Wizarding dance? Peeves was no wizard, but pranking he knew best. He expected pranks on the most romantic day ever, February Fourteenth. However, what he did not expect was the package outside his front door. Inside the package not a prank was discovered, but the most amazing sight ever. Chocolate Cauldrons! Dedicated to one of the most amazing Huffies ever, My Zoe! I love you darling! *snuggles and feeds you chocolate* :choc: |
78. author's choice - penguins “Peeves!” McGonagall bellowed from the ground floor. The Transfiguration Professor was obviously distraught, which was common in June when all her students were stressed out with the looming end-of-term finals, as well as anxiousness for summer vacation. That wasn’t the main reason for her bellowing; rather she was pushed to the limits by a strange sight indeed. Zooming down the corridor, the school poltergeist blinked at Minerva with his big innocent looking expression. Bewildered by her sudden outrage, Peeves fought hard to restrain himself from rash actions. After all, the penguins waddling around the Great Hall were totally NOT his fault. Dedicated to my awesome little sister, Josey. Thank you for your love of penguins and being you. I love you, Waddles! <3 |
65 - Ooze The last thing that Peeves expected was another leak in the girl’s bathroom on the second floor. Harry and his little friends seemed to frequent the little witch’s room more often than not the last few weeks, which was indicative of another mishap soon. Dawdling along the corridor at train speed, Peeves kept his round eyes open for mischief-makers. And mischief he found the moment he walked past the witch’s room for the five hundredth time that day. A blue sticky paste emerged from the top border of the door, in time to ooze all over the school poltergeist. Yuck. Dedicated to a simple amazing Ravenclaw, by the username of Celandine. Thank you for the amazing RPing thus far and here’s wishing for ooze of more fun times ahead. Love you my little stealth partner <3 |
21 - Veela Rumors were spreading like wildflowers. It wasn’t as if it was a rare occurrence though; rumors were rare but when they happened, they spread quickly. This rumor was of particular interest where the most beautiful girl in town was due to be wedlock. Only problem was finding an eligible bachelor for such a dame. One that could handle her alarming charm and wit, without drooling at her feet. As a poltergeist, Peeves knew she wouldn’t have the same effect on him as most men. Thus he went to see the beautiful maiden. The maiden who happened to be … a Veela. Dedicated to my awesome Cinderella Brain Twinneh, who has more charm and beauty than a veela could ever dream to have! |
61 - Kiss When a man kisses a woman, it is something special. A spark lights up from somewhere unknown, as if fate has finally taken a hand. Valentine’s day is often considered a time when one could express themselves to the one they adore with all their heart. Not for Peeves. At least not until this year, when something of the most remarkable events happened. A box of chocolates arrived with a note for Peeves to meet his admirer in the Entrance Hall. Not wanting to miss a good pranking opportunity, the poltergeist went. And received more than he bargained for … a kiss. Yet another drabble dedicated to my Cinderella Brain Twinneh, to let her know that even in the most trying of times, something remarkable can happen at any moment. One of those moments was the one that led us both to SS <3 |
96 - Socks Peeves was roaming around the Hogwarts grounds, as it was Christmas Eve, and there were few students to catch out of bed since most were home for the holidays. It was his intent to not blow anything up this year – was his promise to Dumbledore. Day after Christmas was another story, but on this Eve he would be reasonable. Midnight struck and the miracle occurred. A small brown package flew towards the round poltergeist, knocking him to the ground. Grunting, he sat up to open the package to reveal a brand new pair of socks. His first Christmas present ever. This drabble is dedicated to another amazing badger, who is also an awesome teammate on the quidditch team too! Enjoy the socks, Christy and much love! |
44 - Ford Anglia Finally! After ninety-five years, Peeves came into contact with his first ever vehicle that he found mildly fascinating compared with the broomstick. It was late one night as the poltergeist was lurking around the Forbidden Forest when a cyan Ford Anglia pulled right up to him and the driver seat door swung open, allowing Peeves to enter. And Peeves did. Within a few moments, Peeves had the thing flying over the Hogwarts castle, taking careful aim of slinging dungbombs into each window. Within a few moments, all the windows had been covered. The Ford Anglia quickly became Peeves’ personal prank spot. :mwaha: This particular drabble is dedicated to another amazing badger; my little sister, successor captain, resident prankster, and friend … the one and only BanaBatGirl!! <3 I hearts you forever and ever and everrrrr, Sis! :glomp: |
24 - House elf Because Peeves was bored and tired of the students, it was time to head to the kitchens and annoy a different breed of magical beings. The students were to be in bed anyway, leaving the poltergeist with his second favorite thing: pots and pans. “PEEVES!” The current head house elf, Kreacher, bellowed to the poltergeist. “OUT! Before I tell the Headmistress! NOW!!” He waved the frying pan as if it were a naughty student out of bed instead. But Peeves was far too mischievous tonight to give up that easily; swiftly moving towards the house elf, he whacked him on the head with the pan he was still waving about, snortling from the kitchen. Dedicated to Foxeh and her snortles, for all her hard work in the House Elf FC. Love you! <3 |
10 - Arithmancy The last thing on Peeves’ mind was attending a lesson. But there was little harm – in his mind – of interrupting one. Since it was after all almost the end of term, some livening up of one of the most boring lessons was needed. Arithmancy lesson it was! Stealthy creeping along the second floor corridor Peeves slipped into the closet before the students arrived. Twenty minutes into the lesson, however, he cackled loudly, doing this every few minutes to grab their attention. Distractions. He then moved quickly and softly from the closet, pelting the bearded professor with a water balloon. “Arithmancy is lame, but water balloons never are!” Dedicated to an awesome Hufflepuff – friendly and true – my invisible stalker & my vampire who I love dearly – Whitterz <3 |
79 author's choice - teeth It was that time of year again. Well in the case of a poltergeist, once a decade and Peeves really dreaded these visits. Oh yes, even poltergeists have teeth; thereby requiring dental visits to help maintain sparkling freshness to their mouths. Not that it helps because they don’t brush no matter how often the dentist tells them to. Arriving at the dentist, Peeves shuffled into the office and slipped into the chair nervously. “This won’t hurt. Just hold still.” The dentist reminded. They say that every time. CHOMP! The moment the dentist stuck his fingers in the poltergeist’s mouth, he bit his teeth down into the grape-flavored gloves. Dedicated to one of my bestest friends, Tiffanie, who is truly brilliant and a great role model. Thank you for everything, Tiff! You’re going to make an AWESOME dentist! I love you! |
80 - author's choice - Queue The students were arriving at Hogwarts, which meant that this be one of the most AWESOME days in the life of the poltergeist. All summer long, Peeves was with no one to bother but the few professors that stayed behind at Hogwarts. And the professors were generally boring for Peeves. Sighing wistfully, Peeves waited just inside the gates, barely visible except to those really looking. It was cool for a late summer evening as he watched eagerly the students boarding the carriages from the train. Slipping into the last one on the queue, Peeves was with two little first years, whom he whispered false rumors quietly into their ear about the sorting. |
13 - Quidditch “Ooohh, Check out the arms on THAT keeper!” Felicia squealed excitedly. It was Slytherin vs Ravenclaw and the Eagles were up twenty points, thanks to the muscles of Jim Fields, the newest Quidditch hottie and Ravenclaw's keeper for this term. Frankly though, Peeves could careless about Jim Fields or his stupid muscles; Jim didn't go around causing mischief. And he was about to miss the next quaffle. Discreetly hanging out at the bottom of the goal hoops, Peeves kept a weary eye on the red leather ball. Once the Slytherin chasers made their move towards another perfect shot – that Fields should have blocked – the poltergeist shot one of Filibuster's fireworks into the air creating one of the largest diversions in quidditch history. Take that, Mr HotShot Prefect. Dedicated to Dia … of whom I've had the privilege of being Captain for one term with and now co-prefect with as well. An amazingly fun and smart RPer and awesome friend. =) |
98 - Pajamas (+ Tegz' Mini Christmas Challenge) "Pinstriped pajamas?! You've got to be KIDDING me!" Peeves shook his head as he tossed the wrappings aside and held the striped clothing up to check out his reflection in the classroom window. Really, Peeves knew that Dumbledore was getting up there in his old age, but what he did not realize was that the old Headmaster could NOT pick out a decent Christmas present for the life of him. It was a wonder he didn't get SOCKS for like tenth year in a row, but at the sight of the pajamas, Peeves would have actually preferred the mismatched Christmas socks. |
1 – Herbology Puffapods and sneezeworts were definitely two of the more interesting crops to hybrid, which was exactly what the Professor had third years working on today. The good thing was that they were easy plants, but the downside was that occasionally rare side effects could occur such as sneezing. Fortunately no major sneezing yet, but that could easily change. Especially when a certain poltergeist floated into the Herbology greenhouse five, intent on destroying the ickle students planters. Selecting Suzie's planter, Peeves grinned mischievously - torn between dumping it on the floor and throwing it against the wall of the greenhouse. That was when …. “Achoooooooooooo!!!” |
9 - Defense Against the Dark Arts It wasn't really like Peeves planned mischief. No, like the "Great" Harry Potter, he preferred to say that mischief simply found him. Except in the case of Defense Against the Dark Arts. Everyone knew that position was cursed, which is why the moment Snape received the post, Peeves couldn't help but visit and taunt the former Potions Master. "Tee heee!!! Tee hee! This is your last yearrrrrrrr... na na na!!" And with that, Peeves finishes with his most immature thing about him; blowing a raspberry right into the greasy-haired Severus Snape's face. Cackling, he zoomed down to the Great Hall. |
8 - Potions Whispering in the dungeon corridor, Ron and Harry were plotting mischief again. Of course Hermione was nowhere to be seen; probably in the library or something. Nonetheless, Ron and Harry were considering stealing some boomslang skin for their newest Halloween disguise. “Please Ron, it won't take long,” Harry urged, as Peeves zoomed around the bend. “Yea Ron, not long,” Peeves echoed annoyingly. Harry glared at the poltergeist. “Peeveeeeeeeeeessssss!!!” “Harryyyyy!” “Peeves. I swear I'm going to turn you into Professor Snape.” Peeves cackled at that threat, because he wasn't scared of no Professor. Even if it was the Potions Master. |
6 - Divination Peeves didn't believe any of that fortune-telling stuff. Which is why he was planning on smashing all the tea cups and crystal balls out the window – which considering the height of the tower from the ground – should completely destroy the items. Quickly, he stowed crystals and cups and tarot cards into his pants pockets, filling them to capacity. Arms full, the poltergeist moved over to the window and about to drop them out . . . “PEEVESSSSS!!” The old batty Trelawney bellowed. “What in MERLIN'S beard are you doing?” “Nothing.” “Lies. Put my stuff back. NOW.” |
5 - Astronomy Big grin on his face, tongue lolling around his mouth, Peeves glanced at the big wall clock. That was when he recognized it; the wall clock was like the universe. And the little numbers on the clock were stars and planets. Then there were the hands, moving around and around, like people. Like poltergeists around the castle, causing mischief. Perhaps someone slipped Peeves a calming drought but with the lopsided grin and the sugar-glazed eyes, all he could think about was Astronomy stuff. Weird considering no one ever taught him the subject. “Pluto is the ninth planet... not really a planet...” he drawled on dazedly. |
3 - Transfiguration Switching spells. That's what Luna was practicing at the moment; she wanted to master the art of switching the colors of her socks so they didn't match. Innocently whistling along the second floor corridor, she wasn't even looking up when she whacked herself right into the door of an unused classroom. “What in Merlin's – ?” Poking his head out of the classroom, Peeves shook his head. “This classrooooooom is occupieeddddd, Loonyy Loo!” He grinned, as he held up a Kwikspell book. Cause he was totally practicing some spell work with Filch. Between the pair, they could figure out this transfiguring nonsense. |
4 - Ancient Runes Someone left a trail. It was like they were trying to tell him something in weird symbols, which if Peeves paid any attention at all he would know that they weren't just symbols but runes. More fortune telling stuff. Perth. Ehwaz. Ansuz. Sowilo. Ehwaz. But it didn't stop there; the stones with the symbols kept along the corridor evenly spaced. Fehu. Othila. Raido. Ehwaz. Wunjo. Ehwaz. Raido. Pease? At first he thought it was a horrible misspelling of his name, but then upon closer interpretation he realized that the person was quite simply trying to promote PEACE Forever. How charming. |
45 - torch Fire. No one knew the dangers involved, but it got Peeves' mind reeling with possibilities. This wasn't his first time around the element; it was the first time that he was bored and with the time to conceive to a plan. “Peeves! Don't even think about!” Ginny scolded him from the window in the Gryffindor tower, thinking quick and summoning her broom. But just as she reached the danger zone, Peeves threw the flaming torch in the direction of the Forbidden Forest. “Aguamenti!” Ginny cast, zooming fast towards the flame and managing to save flame from the forest. |
46 - Dungeon Harry was in detention again; no surprise there, especially since it was with Professor Snape. But the big surprise was that his detention involved washing the dungeons walls of the castle with Peeves. The only problem was that Peeves' idea of washing anything including spitting spitballs on the walls, while Harry scrubbed. “Peeves, can you please NOT make this any harder for me?” “Harrrryyy Pottterrrr is a whinnnerrrrrr!!” Peeves echoed, spitting up something gross and projectile it onto the walls. “Can you NOT be so loud?” Harry shook his head, scrubbing the wall more. Stupid non-magic detention rule. |
31 - Dress robes “They're too TIGHT and too much lace!” Peeves complained as he frowned at the black velvet with lace and ruffles that draped his frame. Shaking her head, Ginny didn't really know what to do; she was to be nice to Peeves so that he wouldn't feel left out and therefore reduce his need to ruin a fun-filled evening. Yet all he seemed content to do was to complain about whatever she had him try on. “I can fix the tightness with a simple charm, but I need you to just stop fidgeting!” she scolded and for once he listened. Rippppppppppppppppp! Almost. |
32 - Common room It was common knowledge that creatures were not allowed in the common rooms. However, there was one being that was unique which would be Peeves because although the Headmaster had forbade him from the whole castle even, there wasn't much good reason. Except for when Peeves played practical jokes on the Fat Lady's portrait, terrifying her to the point of hiding in Violet's portrait. As he did every so often, out of amusement mostly. And because he liked to see the students suffer in trying to find out what happened to the Fat Lady this time. Ha! And they called themselves brave! |
33 - Classroom The best part about unattended classrooms lies in the notion that they could easily be abused and it would take weeks, sometimes longer, before someone discovers the damage. At least that was what the chubby poltergeist thought about when he was chewing a huge wad of pink bubblegum that he found under the railing of one of the staircases on the seventh floor. Ickle students not throwing their sugar away! It was the ickle students that would suffer in not being able to use the practice classroom properly due to the big wad of DRIED gum on the door handle and in the keyhole. |
34 - Parseltongue It wasn't like he had purposely spread the rumor of Harry Potter being the Heir of Slytherin, but the students were unfortunately smart enough to figure it out. No one else could talk to snakes AND the heir had returned to Hogwarts. And since the sorting hat had wanted to place Harry into Slytherin, House of Snakes, it all fit the mold. “ssssssssssssssssssss.......” Peeves would hiss in Harry's direction whenever the egocentric second year walked by. “Ssstheee sssheeeirrr ssoff Sslyytherinn” Oh yes because even poltergeists had the ability to learn the language of snakes; at least fake it. |
66 - Pace Can you sneak like a poltergeist? The way pace around the castle . . . wreaking mayhem in whatever crosses their path. It wasn't an easy job but it certainly wasn't the most demanding. Of course it shouldn't be demanding because it wasn't like poltergeists got paid; actually they were generally shunned from wherever they resided. It was a wonder Hogwarts had allowed one for so many years, but now, even in the mayhem wreaked, their poltergeist was a part of the castle. Pacing . . . throwing dungbombs . . . shrieking at students . . . Peeves was practically at home. |
67 - Quell “Pleeeeaseee!! Not now, Peeves!” Hermione pleaded to the poltergeist. Annoying thing that was, which was saying something from the one who had high tolerance of beings rights. Hermione was – naturally – in the library, perusing books and reading on something or other to help Harry no doubt. However Peeves had decided to squelch in some puddles and then splash Hermione with the water on his feet. “Not the books!” she frowned at the watermark that was smearing one of the words on her parchment. “Oh no! Oh no! I've misspelled quelled!” Who knew Hermione was a poet? Inspired by my Staceh who unknowingly rhymed quell with misspell. Love you darling! <3 |
68 - Roar In the hundreds of quidditch games he'd been to, he never really could picture himself flying. Though he tried it once, very long ago but mostly he preferred the ground and distracting the fans through causing trouble. Sliding into the seat in the back row so as to be undetected, Peeves watched quietly for the first half of the game; then when Gryffindor scored for fifth time, that was when he launched his plan into action. Which was barely launched at the lion roar coming from Loony Lovegood's hat that knocked Peeves backward. Who knew his plots could backfire with a 'bang'? |
69 - Slap It was a full blown, hard sound that seemed to echo throughout the castle. Fortunately the students could not bear witness to the Hogwarts' prankster at his weakest point. The Headmaster was furious and wanted him out of the castle by the time the students returned. He wanted to inquire whether that meant he could live in the greenhouses or the caretaker's hut. Even Peeves didn't have it in him to spit that one back out. Sure he was furious at the stunt he pulled on flooding the second floor, but Peeves also knew by now that the Headmaster was bluffing. The slap was enough to prove it. |
47 - Portkey It wasn't like Magical Transportation was a common mode for creatures to use; although it was questionable whether poltergeists were considered creatures or not. Regardless of the fact, one could be certain that this was the first time that Peeves would be traveling via portkey. His presence was requested, after all, by the Minister to present his case for remaining at Hogwarts. Ten o'clock sharp, the small pillow glowed blue. Taking hold, Peeves immediately felt himself spinning down a tornado-like hole. The fastness and dizzying circles made him want to vomit. And he did the moment his feet touched the ground of London. |
48 - Leprechaun “I am a Poltergeist!” Peeves whined to the newest Magical Creatures Professor, who was insisting otherwise. “That's P-O-L-T-uh....A-G-I-C-T” “Uh huh,” the professor rolled their eyes. “You can't even SPELL it which means that you clearly are not.” “But I am! I am an indestructible spirit! I cause chaos!” “No! You're out and much too solid. And that outlandish hat, plus the loud chuckle and ability to cause mischief... You are most CLEARLY a leprechaun!” Not even bothering to answer back, Peeves swooped away and grabbed a textbook, chucking it at the Professor. “Told ya! Poltergeist!” *blows raspberry* |
49 - Yule Ball The annual yule ball, which had become a favorite of the students since the Triwizard Tournament, was happening again. This year it was one week before Christmas holidays and so everyone wanted to go because it was excuse not to pay attention in class the last week as well as stay up late. Meaning that numbers of students out of bed after curfew was increasing and was harder to contain them. “OUT OF BED!!! ICKLE STUDENTS OUT OF BED!!” was being echoed constantly that Peeves felt like a recording at times. Filch would come running and always Peeves would say, 'Nothing.' |
50 - Boggart “Loony, Loopy, Loony Lovegood,” Peeves sang as he swooped down the corridors. “Always off in a daze, it's like she is lost in maze. Loony, Loopy, Loony, Lovegood. Her eyes are glazed and tart, it's a wonder that she is smart.” “Stop it, Peeves!” Hermione ordered, even though it wasn't her being made fun of. “Oh... has the brainy know-it-all come to the rescue?” “Peeves! Don't make get the Blood Baron!” Peeves chuckled. “I shan't afraid of no Baron!” “Well fine then. I'll set the boggart in the cupboard on you!” Humphing, Hermione stalked off. |
55 - Egg on “Oh Filch, please, it's not that hard to create chaos,” Peeves begged of the caretaker. Filch simply shook his head; there was no way he was going to start trouble. The kids already hated on him enough; he didn't need it to be more because he CAUSED them to get into trouble. “No!” He said firmly. “Pleasee.... It won't hurt!” Peeves continued pleadingly. “Fine. Just once.” At those words, Filch reluctantly grabbed a water balloon from the bucket and threw it down into Entrance Hall where a group of students stood chatting. It missed slightly, but splashed the girls' robes nonetheless. |
56 - Fight It wasn't the first time the Fat Lady left her portrait guarding Gryffindor tower, but it was the first time that Peeves found her outside the portrait. She had been visiting with a friend and ran into Sir Cadogan along the way. “Awww!! Looksie howww cutsieee!!!” Peeves taunted the pair, poking his chubby finger toward them . Both of the figures glared at the poltergeist. After glaring though they immediately went back to staring at each other. Evidently Sir Cadogan was arguing that he was a better guardian of the Gryffindor Tower and that he would not leave his post ever. |
35 - Pureblood “I am NO squib!” Peeves declared proudly when overhearing students talking about his blood status. “Oh yea? Then can you do this?” The tall Slytherin boy asked, flicking his wand and levitated peanuts, causing them to launch themselves at the poltergeist. “No! I don't CARE either!” “Well then you are a squib until proven otherwise.” “Fine,” Peeves floated over and smacked the dumb boy's head against the wall with each word following, “I am a full, pureblooded poltergeist.” Peeves finished with his usual raspberry blowing in the boy's face. Pfft. Take that, stupid Slytherin. Author's note: No offense meant to any Slytherins... y'all know that I love you dearly! <3 |
36 - Muggle It was no business for Peeves to be muddling in things that weren't of his concern. But this WAS his concern when the Headmaster was allowing for the first time to let muggles tour Hogwarts. How was the school supposed to be kept secret if it was now being treated like some museum? “Please! Just think of how many Wizarding secrecy laws you are breaking, Headmaster!” Peeves pleaded. “It is not your concern. The laws have changed.” And there was nothing Peeves could do about it except be present for the tour and cause chaos to chase them away before they see TOO MUCH. |
37 - Animagus “Can poltergeists become animagi?” McGonagall posed to her sixth years. It was an interesting question for debated because technically speaking they weren't ghosts. They were not wizards either and therefore had no magical ability. After some discussion, McGonagall continued the lesson with: “True they cannot be animagi, but poltergeists can indeed disguise themselves and are actually talented with it.” Hogwarts' poltergeist, Peeves, loves disguising himself in the armor to scare first years. He would hide in an armor suit; then when the students least expect it, Peeves would clang out of the armor, throwing random bits at them and just being loud and boisterous. |
14 - Hogwarts, A History “No! I have not and will not read that ridiculous book,” Peeves said for the hundredth time at the annual staff meeting. “But Peeves – don't you see how valuable Hogwarts, A History is? With that book, you will know so much more about the school you refuse to leave and therefore be able to use your . . . skills, to a better use.” The Deputy Headmistress explained rationally. It all made sense in theory; any moron could see that, but Peeves just shook his head. “I'll feel . . . ridiculous though, reading it.” |
15 - Room It was cozy in there. Which is also why they all fought for that place on the first floor every year on Valentine's Day. Foremost, students seemed to think that what they knew, the professors and mainly PEEVES, didn't know about it. What they didn't realize was that Peeves had been around longer than them and knew of far more places in the castle then they could ever learn in their seven years at Hogwarts. Which is why one seventh year couple was quite surprised to find the door to the secret room sealed shut; with chewing gum and haphazardly inserted nails. |
16 - Dragonhide gloves “I'm a spirit, I don't need gloves,” Peeves would ever remind the Herbology Professor at their annual staff meetings. “You're also not a Professor, you don't need to be offering input; nor do you even need to be here,” Sprout would remind him, rolling her eyes. “But I am here and dragonhide is terrible for the environmentalist. It kills innocent creatures for selfish reasons. There are better materials that could be used that would not require killing innocent animals.” Hagrid blinked in shock. When had Peeves become the animal lover? “Like wha'?” Innately curious as to his suggestion. “Whomping willow bark.” |
17 - Cauldron “Size two, pheeeeeew-ter” Peeves sang as he floated out of the dungeons, past a group of second years . The loudest of the second years – a slytherin - glared at Peeves, knowing the poltergeist had done something obnoxious. “If you did anything to tamper with our class, then the Bloody Baron will be after you.” That was a promise. “Pheeeeew-ter” The poltergeist cackled, as they entered the smelly classroom. After just a moment though, they were all gagging in the hallway till Snape appeared. “Get in. We have much to do.” “Not in there! Peeves exploded dungbombs in like ALL the cauldrons!” |
18 - Whomping Willow continued from 16 - Dragonhide gloves Hagrid gasped loudly at the suggestion to use for the gloves. There was no way they were going to be destroying a perfectly healthy tree to save a dragon. Though he did appreciate the sentiments, as a dragon lover; he just could not feasibly see it as a possibility. Besides, “The whomping willow will attack anyone who goes near it.” Hagrid reminded Peeves. Oh; minor detail, but Peeves wasn't really interested in the fatalities. “Physical harm is good for the soul. Strengthens you.” “Or kills you.” “Same difference, but...” exasperated sigh. “I guess if you prefer injuring animals, then stick with dragonhide.” |
38 - Patronus “Expectoooooo Patroooooonuuuuummmmbbbb” The defense professor rolled his eyes at the rather exaggerated charm incantation. He knew that it was greatly unlikely for someone other than a human to cast a patronus charm, but that didn't stop him from killing dreams. He was a professor after all, which meant he was to be encouraging. “Ex-pect-o Pat-ro-num” he reminded the poltergeist. “Happy thoughts.” Of course throwing a wand into the mix would be harder. Peeves had never used a wand before … ever. “Ex-pect Pat-riot-nism” Peeves mocked the professor. This was sooo lame! Why had he ever agreed for Patronus lessons anyway? |
39 - Duel “PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVVEEES!!!” McGonagall's voice could be heard from two floors away, which meant someone had TOTALLY snitched on him. It's not like he was using a wand; he didn't know how. And technically speaking he wasn't breaking any rules nor hurting anyone. “I'm gonna tell you again; Poltergeists cannot duel other students!” “But I wasn't, Missus McGonagall.” “That includes physical contact.” Which, sigh, meant that his version of a duel was unacceptable. Life was so unfair. And people wondered why he caused mischief; did he really have any choice? His life was already condemned to a world of chaos because he wasn't allowed to DO anything productive. |
7 - Care of Magical Creatures “BLASTED SKREWT!!!!!!!!!” Peeves glared at the five foot long creature that was disturbing his routine. Technically the creature didn't do anything wrong; it didn't sting, nor did it bite. The creature was simply slugging along . . . sniffing the air for something to do. But in Peeves' mind, it was the fact that it was there that impacted his view of the darned creature. “Be gone. Or I'll throw a hippogriff at you.” If skrewts could laugh, then these dumb ones SO would laugh at that idiocy. And then the creature did it; it attacked the Poltergeist. “EEEEK!!! Studdenttttttsssss!! OUT OF BED!!!” |
11 - History of Magic At least with History, there was no dangerous skrewts or hippogriffs. The only danger involved was boredom from the drone of the monotonous professor. Because who really wanted to be hearing about wizarding wars and famous wizards when there was chaos to wreak? Hovering at the ceiling, Peeves waited patiently until the lesson was about ten minutes under way . . . the first years' eyes were half closed; then the first water balloon fell. SPLAT!! “What the--?” Before other questions or words emitted from the students... there was water balloons falling like rain, wetting ALL the students. So much for a boring class. |
12 - Charms 10 steadfast ways to a witches' heart. It was the most popular book among the fifth year boys. Also the lamest. The book offered only cheesy solutions for how to win the heart of your dream girl; when Peeves knew that the way to charm a girl was through laughter. Reason number one why he started writing his own book. 10 fail-safe ways to charm a witch to laughter by Peeves 10. Pull a prank. She'll laugh about it after she cries first. Crying is a good sign though; if she has enough emotion to cry, then you know you're worth it in her eyes. |
19 - Wand “How many times must I tell you, Ronald? Do not leave your wand unattended.” The redheaded Gryffindor frowned at his best friend. “Everyone has a wand though; why would they want mine?” For the number of times Hermione scolded him about his wand, Ronald still managed to drop it on third floor corridor. Peeves flitted by, scrutinizing for students out of bed, when he saw it. “I haz a wand! I haz a student's wand!” Swooshing the wand along the corridor, Peeves was in clear bliss. The best part of the situation was that Peeves was unable to do magic; imagine the chaos if he could. |
20 - Hogsmeade “It will just be a quick visit; no one will even notice I'm gone,” Filch chided to the other staff members. Shaking their heads, they were convinced the caretaker had lost his mind. After all, he never wanted to visit the village before. “Ooh la la . . . someone's got a crush . . .” Peeves mused in a sing-song voice. Ignoring the poltergeist, Filch went on his way to Hogsmeade, combing his fingers through his matted hair as he strode along. He didn't care what Peeves said; he did NOT have a crush . . . that he would admit, anyway. |
22 - Kneazle “Aaaahhhhhhhhhhchooooooo!” It must have been like the hundredth time that day for the poltergeist to sneeze. Sniffling, he tried to think of how possibly he could cause some chaos when he kept sneezing all the Merlin's time! It had to be the kneazles; Peeves should have known that he was allergic to the darned animal. “Aaaaaaahhhchooo!” “My! Stupid kneazles,” Peeves cursed out mentally, as he thought of ways to get rid of the animal. Finally, at long last, he SNEEZED a thick, gooey mucous flew from the spirit's nose and completed sprayed the area. So much for needing chaos. |
23 - Telescope “What is it?” Peeves asked with interest as he floated around the Astronomy tower. He was eager to find out more about what that object was that the Professor and students used quite frequently to look at the stars, presumably. “Try it.” The professor encouraged the students. Shrugging indifferently, Peeves floated over and looked inside the eyepiece. “It's... So sharp and clear.” “Of course. It is a scope that allows one to see things in space and study things that we cannot see with the bare eye.” The Professor explained diplomatically. “It is a telescope.” |
40 - Spell “Win-guard-yum Lei-vey-ooh-sure” Filch shook his head at the poltergeists pronunciation; sure he and Peeves were in cahoots to master some basic spells before school started again in just two weeks. Really though, he wished he could take back his word and just learn on his own; Peeves was a hindrance to his learning style. “No, Peeves, Wing-ard-ium Levi-o-sa” the caretaker rolled his eye, enunciated the two words carefully. “Can't we work on this later? I need to get my new first year prank ready for the little ones.” “This IS part of the first year prank.” “Oh right.” |
41 - Thestrals “Can spirits see thestrals?” Ron asked inquisitively. “You know, like if they've seen death or something? Or do those rules not apply to them like they do to wizards?” “It's different, Ronald,” the professor explained impatiently. “We can't say for sure, but I would imagine yes, the same rules apply.” “Oh. Peeves claims he can see them.” But then again, in the age of the spirit, it was likely the poltergeist had seen death. “I can!! Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! I seeeeeee aalllllllllllllll!!!!!!” Peeves zoomed around the circle of students on the edge of the forest cackling loudly. |
42 - Portraits “Talk to portraits and people might think you're mad,” Peeves taunted the boy who was lucky, aka Harry Potter. “Go away Peeves.” Peeves sighed, feigning disappointment in the young man's displeasure in seeing him. It wasn't like he bothered Potter a lot . . . okay, maybe he did. But how could one resist when there was SO much gossip to spread about an already well-known boy. “Fine, but so you know, one day, I am gonna be in one of those portraits.” Harry snorted. “Yea right. You'd have to be somebody to get a portrait.” |
43 - Headmaster {Continued from 42 - Portraits} “I am somebody. I am a spirit of chaos. That is more somebody than any of the Headmasters combined.” Peeves reminded the boy. “Unfortunately, Peeves, you'd have to be more than a spirit. You'd have to be a Headmaster to get a portrait here.” “Nu-uh. What about Cadogan, Violet or the fat lady?” “They have portraits throughout the castle, not in the Headmaster's office.” Peeves cackled again. “I never said specific to those portraits, but one of them portraits. And I could be Headmaster. I'd be AWESOME.” “And the school would of chaos, not wizardry” Harry murmured before walking away. |
81 - Depression “We have to do something about that Poltergeist” McGonagall pressed. “He keeps wreaking havoc and quite frankly, I think it's lowering the morale of the students” “I'm afraid there is nothing we can do, McGonagall” The headmaster reminder her gently. The school nurse shook her head, thinking. Peeves dwelled at Hogwarts because he had no place else. His spirit was doomed to remain at Hogwarts for eternity, unless they could think of another solution. In some sense, Peeves was a lot like Moaning Myrtle, minus the wailing. “Clearly, Peeves is depressed.” The nurse said with finality. |
82 - Careful “Be careful around these parts. Peeves likes to throw water balloons and spitballs at unsuspecting students.” The prefect whispered to the newest group of first years. But like always, there was one in every group. Late one night, two first years sneaked out of the dormitory and wandered down toward the kitchen. They heard rumors that the house elves liked to give foods to those who asked. As warned, Peeves thwarted their attempts with two water balloons aimed at each of their heads and then a loud screech: “ICKLE STUDENTS OUT OF BED!!! ICKLE STUDENTS OUT OF BED!!” |
83 - Fearful “I have no phobias!” Peeves overheard a Gryffindor student telling their friend. Shaking his head, the poltergeist had to disagree. After all, if Gryffindors were so brave, then why did they often scream and yell at him? Or if any student had no fears, then why did they need professor assistance when he pranked them? It was all clear to the Hogwarts poltergeist. To prove his theories, Peeves swooped down on the Gryffindors and spat a medium-sized wad of chewing gum at the taller one's hair. “EEK! Peeves!!” The student glared a moment later. Point proven; Pneumatiphobia. Students were fearful of spirits. |
84 - Angry “There is no need to get angry, Peeves. We're not kicking you out.” McGonagall said diplomatically. She was always so diplomatic about everything and it drove him CRAZY, because he couldn't even be rude to someone like that. Sigh. “But you restricting my every movement. It's basically like PRISON!” “No. If it were prison, there would be dementors, and I will not tolerate soul-sucking creatures near this school” Peeves glared, his face hot, wishing he could do something. “Well fine. I still have no restrictions to where I can go still, right?” “Your restrictions lie in what, not where.” |
75 - Yodel "What exactly are you doing, Peeves!?" Hermione stared at the school poltergeist, one eyebrow raised. For the past fifteen minutes, Peeves had been working on a step one-step two sort of thing at the Dias in the Great Hall. One foot back, one foot forward, take a step to the left, and a slide to the right . . . turn around and start it over again. "It's called, Yo-del-ing, Miss Bookworm. Try reading about dances instead of other rubbish and you'd know." Gasping, she frowned and crossed her arms. "I know what yodeling is. And that is not it." |
52 - Bore “Gee” Ron sighed as he looked out the window at his housemates playing Quidditch. “I wish I could play.” Hermione looked up from her Runes Homework questioningly, “Why's that? Quidditch is boring anyway.” “Pfft. You're a boar, 'mione” “It's bore. B-O-R-E.” Hermione spelled out, rolling her eyes. “Whatever.” Ron rested his head in his arms as he continued to gaze out the window; AWAY from the bookworm. Just then, Peeves zoomed into the Gryffindor Common Room, cackling at their conversation. “Y'all are boring. The REAL action is on the thirdddddddd floorrrrrr......” Cackleeeeeeeeee..... !!! |
53 - Chase “Oh no he didn't!!” Hermione stared after the poltergeist, cackling, no doubt off to the third floor. She might have been young, but that didn't mean she was STUPID enough to let him get away with murderrr.... “Come and getttt meeeeeeeeeeee.....” Peeve taunted at the Gryffindors, blowing a raspberry for good measure. Like the speed of firebolt, he was off and down the corridor … Running fast. They'd never find him. Yet they would chase. Gryffindors were gullible like that. Never turn down a threat. Until he would get them in trouble; “ickleeeeeeeee second years OUTTA BEDDDDDDD!!” |
54 - Dare Within seconds, Severus Snape, Potions Master, came running down the corridor. He finally was gonna catch Harry Potter and his friends out of bed and put them in their place: detention. Except for one slight problem. Peeves seemed to … hiding the ickle students. “Where are they Peeves?” “I dunnnnnnntttttt knoww, Greasy-haired man.” Peeves flailed. Truth, sort of. Curse Hermione and her act of brilliance, like always. Double daring him. Aggravated, he shook it off. “Fine. Don't everrr scream for me again, unless its the truth.” Scoffing, he turned on his heel. Or a dare, Peeves thought, mischievously. |
59 - Ignore Reality was that Peeves didn't know how to behave nicely, despite the Headmaster's requests bequeathed upon him for the opening feast. Heaving a sigh, he glanced around the empty castle, anticipating the arrival of the students. There was really only one solution to maintain his solemn swear to the Headmaster. Ignoring them. He just had to find a way to entertain himself, but without stolen dungbombs or prank items, he was at a loss. This was going to be one long feast, Peeves concluded, as he conceded to hiding up on the roof. At least he could be mildly entertained by attempting to connect the stars . . . |
57 - Gape “Close your mouth! It's rude,” McGonagall scolded for what must have seemed like the hundredth time. Yet no matter how many times she told him, Peeves always found away to keep it open. Gaping, as one might call it. It wasn't that he lacked the coordination to close it, but simply he was in permanent shock. Dolores Umbridge … was going to be teaching that term. Already Peeves knew she would be a good target for pranking, but he wasn't about to openly admit it. The shock of it all. And poor Dolores … she was going to HATE Hogwarts by the end of the term. |
51 - act “Stop goofing around” The Head Boy glared at the ickle first years, as he tried to control them. They were asking for trouble, yet nothing he did was going to help. “We're just improvising,” said the first kid. “Innocent, non-silliness. Promise.” “It would be improvising....only cause you can't act.” Peeves said tauntingly, as he strolled down the corridor. “Seriously, if you could act, then you wouldn't be scolded because it would be something people would actually want to see.” The Head boy rounded on the poltergeist. “Thank you for that fine definition of acting.” He commented sarcastically. |
85 - Snappish // Mini-Challenge #5 Peeves meandered around the grounds, looking for his next victims. It was not easy to pick the perfect person to play a prank on; who wouldn't snap at anything ever done to them. Looking toward the audience, he frowned. “Fansssssssss!!!” Peeves exclaimed, extraordinarily high-pitched voice. “I'm gonna throw some dungbombs at you. DO NOT SNAP.” “Mmhmm... no one can snap like you,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Now isn't the time.” Peeves said getting the dungbombs ready. “When is?” Thump, Thump. Dungbombs bounced off the crowds' heads and exploded, filling the auditorium with fowl smells. |
86 - Daring There was no way Peeves would be caught dead outside of Gryffindor Tower. Sure he was the school poltergeist, but if he could be sorted than he knew it would Gryffindor that the hat would place him. Chivalry – he had that. Not a clue what it meant, but it sounded cool. But it was the next term that he knew was like “PEEVES! GRYFFINDOR! NOW”. Daring. If he wasn't daring, than he never would have managed all those pranks over the years. So Peeves just KNEW he was daring. Besides, who else could dare me to write this? |
87 - Plaid “No! I won't wear that AWFUL plaid jumpsuit to the opening feast!” Peeves exclaimed at the headmaster, ready to throw the cockroach clusters at him. If it was soooo appealing, why didn't HE wear a plaid jumpsuit? Oh right, he was Headmaster . . . and a wizard. “It's not that bad ...” The Headmaster said calmly, knowing it was though. “Oh? Why don't you wear it?” Peeves spat. “Can't. Headmaster.” Peeves rolled his eyes. “Fine. But I'm painting the WHOLE jumpsuit bright orange.” Orange would be better than plaid; and it'd ruin color coordination too. |
88 - sweet tooth Creeping down the kitchens, Peeves had to be grateful he was no student. Though if he was than he would have gotten some treacle tarts and chocolate fudge at the opening feast, because he wouldn't have been humiliated by his bright orange jumpsuit. Though it was his idea to dye it, it was the Headmaster that made fun of it. Whatever. He'd get his cup of tea when he found the bed bugs in his sleeping chamber. Now was chocolate time. Almost there . . . “Freeze!” The head elf shouted. “Bajeezus! Who knew the pranking poltergeist had a sweet tooth?” |
89 - Past “It does not do to dwell on the past....” Peeves read the inscription on the wall outside the Headmaster's office. Oh what hogwash that was, he sighed, rolling his eyes. Even Peeves knew that without the past, he would not know what mistakes were made and therefore could not correct them. Like the major pranks of the past – done by him and other great minds, like the memorable portable swamp and fireworks by the Weasley twins. Those were awesome moments of the past, but can be improved upon by knowledge of them. Knowledge of the past is vital . . . |
91 - Future // Mini-Challenge #6 Learning from the past can only help us in the future. This term, for instance, Peeves knew he would do pranks differently from before. It was the chance to start all over again and he would do it right – with diplomacy. No more throwing wet socks at passerbys or calling out names. He was going to be good. It was a bright future for the poltergeist. No more dungbombs or stink pellets or water balloons. There was only lemondrops. In which Peeves gleefully spat out at random students as they left they Great Hall for the first time that year. |
62 - Lope There was no way that Peeves would be caught cantering around the grounds like some triathlete. Really it wasn't as if he was some gorgeously strong Palomino that could lope around the grounds easily. Staring at the third years at the Magical Creatures lesson, the poltergeist groaned as the students effortlessly climbed on the back of Abraxans, who would lope around the edge of the Forbidden forest. So rhythmically. So little effort. So graceful. Though Peeves, if no one else, knew that they would get what was coming to them. Soon, they would pay for their rhythmic grace and gait. |
63 - Mooch No one ever suspected the potions master. Which is exactly why the poltergeist would make sure it was the potions master who did the dirty work . . . who got framed for his endeavors. Mooching off the rich pureblood kids for monies for prank items was so epic! Sliding down into the Slytherin Common Room – because that was where all the rich kids were, right? - Peeves made sure it was late in the night, when all were asleep. Checking the pockets . . . the poltergeist discreetly mooched galleons here or there, ensuring he left potion residue behind. |
64 - Nap There was nothing like dreaming during a refreshing after-prank nap. During this particular dream, Peeves was down in the entrance hall with the well-known Fred and George. They had been plotting a major food fight to take place OUTSIDE. It would involve targeting anyone wearing purple pokadots in which one would have a paintball gun and shoot it at random people outside. The other two . . . would then make targets of them and laugh when they got hit with a Shepard's pie or treacle tart. Of course, don't forget the chocolate fudge lava cake! Naps were entertaining too! |
70 - teem The beginning of the term was always easy for the 'quick prank jobs', as students filed into the Great Hall the morning of the first day at Hogwarts. Students were groggy from lack of sleep after celebrating with their new and returning housemates, which made them perfect targets. Peeves would be lurking around the banister overlooking the lobby. Unsuspecting firsties were the best because they didn't know him yet. So as they would teem just outside the hall, Peeves would aim his water balloons at them. Nothing like entering the Hall for your first morning at Hogwarts being soaking wet. |
71 - Untie Creeping under the staff table at the opening feast, Peeves was grateful that the tablecloth draped to cover the whole side of the table. Professor's feet and most importantly – he – couldn't be seen. Working from one end to the other end of the table, he untied each professor's shoelaces and tied one lace to shoe next to it. Oh those professors would kill him if they knew . . . But gosh this was going to be amusing when one rose from their seat. This was the punishment for teaching a poltergeist how to untie and tie shoelaces. |
72 - Vex Some could say that Peeves was a professional at vexing, but honestly, it was just part of being a poltergeist. Annoying others was part of the personality that came naturally . . . no training necessary. “Ickleeee firstieesss out of bedd!!!!” Peeves would exclaim at high-pitch tones. Like those loud and obnoxious buzzing noises that you couldn't shake and were just there. That was Peeves. He would be there to yell and shout when something was off just to annoy those who were getting into trouble. Yet, when it was him getting in trouble, he was nowhere in sight. |
73 - Warn “Ssh! He's coming!” One Gryffindor girl hushed, scurrying around the bend on the third floor. “I doubt we'd get in trouble! We're just going to charms. Three hours early.” Her friend giggled back. “I wouldn't trust that …. or your giggle,” she frowned, scolding her friend. “Peeves has been known to pop out of nowhere. He's loud and rude and will get a professor.” “... And he will hear youuuu warning your friend about me. All of which are . . .” Peeves paused for dramatic effect. “Professor! Studentsss loitering in the hallll!” he screeched, grinning broadly at the girls. |
74 - x-tinguish “Do not let the lights go out under your cauldrons,” the potions master instructed first and foremost. Robes billowing as he turned and wrote the potion on the board, he whirled back around a moment later. “I mean it, Peeves,” he glared at the poltergeist, mentally muttering about the ridiculous idea of giving the poltergeist and caretaker a potions lesson over the summer. Peeves pinched the flame, extinguishing it instantaneously, following it with an innocent look. “Oops. Sorry. I was seeing if it was hot. It wasn't.” “No excuses. You are dismissed from this and ALL potions lessons.” |
76 - Zap Waving his fake wand around, Peeves was basking in the glory of his new toy. He could pretend to zap people with it and majority of the time . . . they fell for it. For two seconds until they realized nothing happened at all. For instance: incoming pair of students from the grounds; Peeves would brandish his wand and say 'Zap!' whereas one of the students would fall to his knees. For a second, when their friend shook their head. “C'mon! Get up silly! It's a fake!” Peeves would walk away cackling and looking for the next zap victim. |
77 - Cheerful “Well aren't you in a cheerful mood today, Peeves?” McGonagall asked by way of friendly conversation as she passed the poltergeist in the hallway. “Sure … if you could consider catching students out of bed again last night putting me in a chipper mood. Honestly, can't they learn to stay in their common rooms after curfew?” “But then you would be bored.” “I'd find some use for my time,” he grinned, mischievous twinkle in his eye. Though he doubted the professors would approve. “Oh Peeves, what would we do without you?” Everything, McGonagall answered mentally. |
90 - present No time like the present . . . Least that's what Dumbledore told Peeves when he warned him about his behaviors for the coming term. But that was all Dumbledore had bothered to say, which left Peeves' actions rather open. That meant the time was now to start a new prank; this one would involve getting ickle first years into trouble. Easy peasy. Reset the alarm clocks in the first year dormitories making it AM instead of PM. At night, their alarm goes off and they think they're running late to their lesson – BAM! Out of bed after curfew. |
93 - Chicken There was no way that Peeves would be eating that chicken kabob from the feast. Even at the feast it looked horridly dried out with no flavor. Not to mention that he was trying really hard to not eat meat, as he read a book over the summer about how vegetarians succeed more at their pranks. Being a poltergeist, where pranks were his forte, he had to test that theory out. “...and now, as our new start of term ritual, we're going to all do the chicken dance” the headmaster concluded his speech and the music began playing. So much for avoiding meat. |
94 - Allergic “Bouillabaisse” Peeves overheard Hermione telling Ron about this one foreign dish at the tables that evening. “Bull an allergy more like it,” Peeves mused as he glanced around the great hall. Who to prove his allergy to that would be the question? Ah . . . that redheaded boy would be the perfect victim. With a swift and subtle movement, the poltergeist glided across the hall and picked up a spoonful of the French fish stew. Flinging a spoonful at the boy was just enough to trigger the poltergeist's allergy. “Achhoooooooo!!!!!!!” The snot flew to covering ANYTHING in sight. |
95 - Snowball There was nothing like a traditional snowball fight in the middle of the quidditch pitch in January. Everyone would come out to partake . . . even Peeves, who from time to time, hid stuff like jelly and dung in the snowballs. But the secret insides made the fight all the more interesting to watch [and participate] in. “Oh no you don't!” Peeves grimaced, as he threw a special mango-seeded one at the magical creatures professor. It hit her square on in the back of her head. Mango seeds and rinds in the hair would NOT be fun to wash out. Dedication note: This one goes to the lovely Claudia and her School RP character who likes chewing on those mangoes! <3 |
97 - Dictionary Pushing up his [fake] glasses, Peeves sat at one of the reference tables with a ginormous book in front of him. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, he mentally repeated, trying to sound it out just right. This was one of the longest words he could find, which meant using it would maybe impress the headmaster enough to let him teach a lesson next term. {Enter Peeves' imagination} “Oh headmaster! It would be supercalifragilisticexpialidocious of you if you let me teach the children a lesson next term” “Only if you don't use the dictionary as your textbook” the headmaster warned. “You won't be disappointed” Peeves grimaced. |
99 - Newspaper SWAT! The rolled up Daily Prophet paper connected with another pesky fly. At least the poltergeist was being semi-useful with his murdering of the pesky flying bugs. With only the occasional swatting at first years, who could really complain? Except for one young slytherin boy . . . who eyed Peeves cautiously as he ate his porridge. Something that Peeves did notice. With an innocent swat there and another there, it seemed hardly purposeful when the newspaper connected with the porridge bowl, sending the food product flying in the air and the bowl landing like a hat on the boy's head. |
100 - Homework When Peeves wanted satisfying, then there was nothing like messing up a Ravenclaw's HARD WORK known as homework. Oh yes, they're homework was always the best to mess with because they worked the longest and hardest on it. So when they would find it worse for the wear, it was most devastating. It was two weeks before the end of term, which meant nearly everyone was cramming information into their brains. Planting several dungbombs in the Ravenclaw Common Room as well as air-absorbent laxatives. If the stench wasn't enough, the poor Eagles would be in the bathroom instead of studying. |
58 - Hoot Mischief is not something that should be taken lightly; only select few people would succeed in pulling off a successful prank, but even more will fall victim to pranks. No matter what category though, the spirit of the poltergeist will forever be known for their mischievous ways. They thrive on making loud noises of disruption and drawing attention to themselves. Once a home is established for the poltergeist than it is highly difficult to get them removed. Though annoying because it is unknown about their existence being real or imaginary, they do make life more interesting. Perhaps, even a hoot! |
60 - Joke “Ooooooooh, Ickle firsties!” Peeves cooed as he swept down the corridor, tilting the portrait frames at odd angles and blowing raspberries in interjection at random students. There was no stopping the master of chaos now; not after Fred and George's parting words of years past. Seemingly, there was some hope for Peeves listening to others, but only when it revolved him causing more mischief. Chucking bits of parchment and random slugs at the students could only go so far. Peeves was not idiot enough to believe his jokes would be eternally funny. Though it was still just a joke. The End. Thank you all for your patience and for reading my drabbles and hope you enjoyed at least some of them! <3 |
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