hey... i just wrote a few poems and were wondering what you guys thought... please tell me ur honest opinion it will be muchly appreciated! thanx

BEST FRIENDS

I knew everything about

Her

She knew everything about

Me

Like friends do

My best friend



We shared our thoughts

Our happiness

Our sadness

We knew everything about

Each other

Yet I did not know

Her

And she did not know

Me



I was a mystery

She was a mystery

And I never knew

That two people could be so close

Two people that didn't even know each other



But since i have met you

I have long learned

You don't need to know someone

You only need to know

That they will always be there for you


here is another one called DANCER


We feel the freedom

Of the music,

It makes my heart soar.

We practice containment,

My earthbound feet

Feel the ache.

I understand

The duality of dance—

Love the freedom

Respect the studied movement.





We move in unison,

As one,

Part of the music,

A piece of the whole,

Individual yet joined.

I feel and I practice,

The music plays—

We dance and dance again,

to become

Poetry in motion.



We leap into the air,

But not as high

As my heart soars.

With simple joy

With hard earned perfection

A paradox in motion—

Both independent

And dependent.

We dance the song away

And wait for tomorrow,

In hopes that we might

Dance another song away



wut do u gusy think???? thanx!

they're really good! i like the rhythm and how they flow :flowersmile:

read mine (titled "Muses") and tell me what you think! thanks!

their great :flowersmile:
please post more!

thanx guys i'll have more coming somtimes i'm drowned in homework at the moment though... better get back too it...

Pretty in pink
Says my sister
Bows tied big and bright
Slippery silky satin
Sweet as sun on Sunday

Pink is pretty
A dress with dots
And a soft smooth sash
Shoes that shimmer
And socks the same

Pink so pink
It pops and pings
On little nails
Newly painted
Her fingers fine and fair


Perfect in pink
My sister seems
The fine frosted icing
On the cutest cupcake
So sweet and sunny
With dotted dress
Tied with a silky sash
Sitting still and sugary
For one small second!

thats so sweet!!! I love pink
I need to start writing some more carefree ones, although your first one is my fav...

write more soon!

Pretty kool! I think you already checked my poetry out... right? titled danz_angel's poetry... & add ur own!

thanx everyone the first one is my favorite also! sorry i haven't had any news ones for awhile... school and homework have taken over my life! haha well i'll try to get a new one up soon...

lol, it's k ^^

if it wouldn't be too much trouble could u look at my ff's! Only if you'd like, tho

hi, VERY good writing. ive read only a few other person's writing to know that mine needs work! lol keep writing, ur good!

thanx eveelisabeth i'm off to go read yor now! lol i am sure it is great!!!!! if not great even better.... dracnyzz hm... i'll love to read ur FF gotta tell me where to find it though...

thanx for the responds! i will hopefully have another out later today... or maybe i have one i can post now

i wrote this sometime this week lol


Silent was the swan
On the silver pond
With twilight
Yet to come
This day was done
Yet she made it new.

Equal was their match
The graceful goddess
The silvery slice of water
A swan’s reflection
In a fluid mirror
A ponds reflection
In her deep dark eyes

I will forever recall
The duality
Of their beauty
And that he stepped closer
Now so far away
Close only
When my tears
Slice the veil
Then silent is the swan
On the silver pond
And I am home again.

here is a poem from me:

the ghost of the darkness,
silver, see-through,
all you see is the wall behind it.
secretive, mysterious,
all alone with no one to care,
just as the life she left behind.
she passes me,
a shiver, a thought,
of a life without love, compassion.
then she turns to me,
witha tear on her cheek,
and disappers into the darkness.

what do you think of it?
this was made up just now as i was typing. i find that easy.

as i told you guys i have been very busy... and i am sorry that i have not written any poems for a LONG time... but here is one i just wrote for school... it still needs some touch-ups but i think its ok so far~

My true love’s hand wears no golden ring
With fingers long to stroke my waiting face
No pretty loving songs his voice doth sing
Or spoken poems to fill the empty space.
If strong arms make a true love bold
In this arena also my friend doth fail
For his are thin and not designed to hold
Yet my love refuses to reduce to proper scale
If talent on a sporting field marks love
Mine has again far missed its mark
For he would rather sit and watch the dove
Or nestle in my arms to watch the fire spark
Yet, my uncomplicated one feels warm and right
Nestled near the fireplace with tail curled tight.

Awesome. I really like them, Amber

--Mr Shrine

oh gosh you are such a good writer. i love the broadness of your topics. they aren't all about the same thing. which normally happens to me!! lol keep writing, thanks for reveiwing mine!

these are very very very well written! i love them!

hey here is one of my older ones i just saw it... and i love it! lol

^^by the way thank-you everyone for the complaments they mean a lot to me!!!!

I might not have perfect complexion and my hair normally looks terrible.
I am beautiful
I might spend hours in a dance studio a week. And chances are my feet are ruined from it. I find great glory in stage make-up, tutus, the roar of an audience, and dancing my cares away.
I am beautiful
I cry over losses, and I get frustrated over pain. I have many people who hate me. and many who love me. i love to be happy. and I hate to be sad.
I am beautiful
Some think I'm perfect, while I have things burried that some may never know. I cry myself to sleep, and I don't know y.
I am beautiful
I have dreams and goals. Morals and principles. I know who I am now...
I am beautiful

ok hope you liked it!!!! i'll have more soon as we are doing peotry in school!

XOXOX ~*Star aka ambe*~

i LOVE the! keep up! i cant tell you like to dance too!

LOL thanks for reeading them! sorry everyone i haven't had any news ones up forever! i am so busy i'll try to write more soon!

great job ^ add more!

These are absolutely amazing, Star! I can't believe you wrote them! Please update soon. I love your poems! :wub:

Thanks every1 for the replies it means a TON to me!!!! I have break coming up in 2 days so i'll be able to work on my FF and hopefully some poems... does anyone have any requests for what i write on??? :sorcerer:

It's hard to see you and not want to be with you

(i wrote this poem in about maybe 5-10 min. so there are prob. parts that aren't perfect but i liked it! lol)

I look into your eyes and see to your heart
I want to win it over, but it seems that I cannot
I try every day, and yet I am always in the same spot
It’s hard to see you, and not want to be with you.

You walk by and smile at me
I fall into a daze by your beautiful grin
And cannot help but think of what I would do
If I knew that beautiful face was mine for eternity

You wave and say hi
I can’t help but think you’re the best
We just don’t seem to mix up right
But still its hard to see you, and not want to be with you

We have had one chance
But that’s not enough
All I wish for now
Is a second chance

For every night when the stars glow bright
I wish that you’ll love me as I love you
It hasn’t come true but I keep on wishing for you
Because its hard to see you, and not want to be with you

Holy Bejeezers!

WOTCHER!

You're good