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Candy Display Case (Finished Fanfiction) A dazzling showcase of fully wrapped-up stories, these sweet treats are polished and ready for your reading pleasure!

 
 
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Old 09-14-2003, 12:02 AM   #1 (permalink)
Slytherin
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Location: it doesn't really matter...
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I'm not a good poetry writer, but just to get opinions on my attempts, I'm posting some of them here. So...yeah. Tell me if you like them, please.

Memory
I once was here,
But now I'm gone,
To a better place,
Far beyond the
Children's cries,
High above the
Smoggy skies.
I remember that
It wasn't all bad...
Remember the fun
That we would have?
And as the sun comes
At dawn, I'd like you
To know that I love you,
Even though I couldn't
Tell you until now-
WHen I'm gone.

I know it's stupid, but tell me what you think of it.
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Old 09-14-2003, 12:27 AM   #2 (permalink)

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that's good.
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Old 09-14-2003, 07:52 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Swimming Shakespearette

I really like it. I think it is really good.
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Old 09-18-2003, 06:09 PM   #4 (permalink)


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Hogwarts RPG Name:
Amelia Yarborough
Hufflepuff
Seventh Year

Hogwarts RPG Name:
Emerald Peridot "Dot" Ainsley
Gryffindor
Seventh Year

x10
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HOLISTIC ACTRESS {X O} EVERYTHING IS CONNECTED

wow i love it, tuns of meaning...i mean its not so "cheery" its good...
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Old 09-21-2003, 03:43 PM   #5 (permalink)
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wow i absolutely love that one, really makes you think too...
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Old 09-24-2003, 03:01 AM   #6 (permalink)
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oh, i'm glad people like it! makes me feel better about my poems! Here's another one, tell me if it's alright.

Time to Tell

I haven't told you often,
I haven't told you tons,
But this seemed like a good time
To say thanks for all you've done.
I love you very deeply,
And with all of my heart,
Yet I know that I don't always
Show this hidden part. So
I will tell you here, and I
Will tell you now, while
I still have a chance,
Before my time runs out.
I love you, and thanks
For all you've done. I'm
Sorry I couldn't tell you
Sooner.
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Old 09-26-2003, 09:09 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Swimming Shakespearette

It's great!
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Old 09-28-2003, 01:59 PM   #8 (permalink)


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Join Date: Dec 2002
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Posts: 21,838

Hogwarts RPG Name:
Amelia Yarborough
Hufflepuff
Seventh Year

Hogwarts RPG Name:
Emerald Peridot "Dot" Ainsley
Gryffindor
Seventh Year

x10
Default
HOLISTIC ACTRESS {X O} EVERYTHING IS CONNECTED

Quote:
Originally posted by Kellarae@Sep 23 2003, 10:01 PM


Time to Tell

I haven't told you often,
I haven't told you tons,
But this seemed like a good time
To say thanks for all you've done.
I love you very deeply,
And with all of my heart,
Yet I know that I don't always
Show this hidden part. So
I will tell you here, and I
Will tell you now, while
I still have a chance,
Before my time runs out.
I love you, and thanks
For all you've done. I'm
Sorry I couldn't tell you
Sooner.
Wow...Very good... Muy Bien!
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IT'S NOT AN ACT OF LOVE __________________________________________________ ___________
____________
IF YOU MAKE HER ____________
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Old 09-30-2003, 09:58 PM   #9 (permalink)
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thanx hpangel and blonder_than_u. i'm glad people like my poems! here's another one that i just wrote.

Life

Life is a river, flowing out to sea.
Or maybe it's more like a stream,
Wandering endlessly... It could
Even be the ocean, for it is vast,
You see. WHo knows what life is
It's the greatest mystery. You can
SIt and wonder why we die, and
Why we live, and why we cry.
YOu can ponder life constantly,
ANd determine if it is river,
Stream, or sea. It may even vary
Individually. I don't know what it is
For me.
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