Latest Site Notices

Ama · 03-27-2005, 02:12 AM

Hello...this is my first dare...well, actually, it's the first dare I accept. This is probably the only way I can do good by being evil. XD!

It isn't easy being me. You get sweaty and it's not even your own sweat. You have to suffer the stinkiness of people. The constant staining of sometimes incredibly weird substances (like that time with the orange goo that wouldn't come off) and...don't look at me like that! I have the right to complain, after all, I am Harry Potter's school robes. Yes, that Harry...uh huh, the one with the scar. You should try being his robe! You got sharp fangs constantly tearing you apart and blood all over you!

"So, Ron!" I hear Harry Potter shout from inside the showers as I lay here in the floor next to some stinky socks. "Did you write Snape's essay?"

"What?" Shouts a voice which I'm guessing is that red head that follows him around.

I hear a loud thump and someone curse.

"Who dropped the soap?" The same voice as before calls.

"Sorry!" calls another voice.

Ok...here he comes. He gets dressed and puts me on.

"No I haven't," says the boy named Ron.

Harry's back is turned to him but I, being the robe that I am, see him pick his nose, stare at the booger curiously, form it into a ball and fling it away. Harry walks out of the showers and next thing I know all I see is a mass of brown stuff. Harry pulls back and I see her. Is that bushy haired girl. She smiles nervously as she hides something behind her.

"Hermione, what you got there," the red head boy asks.

"Nothing," she says and looks down the hallway.

Suddenly I spot a dozen of Girl Scouts running towards us. Hermione screams: "Eek!" Harry goes: "huh?" and Ron shouts: "Hey Girls Scout Cookies!" and reaches for the box of cookies in Hermione's hand.

"Ron, No!" The bushy haired girl shouts and snatches the box of Girl Scout cookies from his hands.

It was too late. The Girl Scouts stopped in their tracks and sniffed the air. Then they looked directly at us and began to run. You see if I could talk I would tell Harry to run right now like that time in the Chamber of Secrets where I could have told them that Lockhart was about to steal the red head's wand and that time...ok...Flee you fools Flee! Don't you see they're heading towards us...and we flee we do. We're running down the halls with a bunch of screaming Evil Girl Scouts behind us.

"Give us back our cookies!" Shouted some. "You didn't pay!"

"Buy one and get another at half price!" Shouted another as we proceeded to run towards the dungeons.

"Fantastic!" Ron shouted. "We are late for Potions, I didn't do my homework and now we have evil Girls Scouts after us!"

"You didn't do the homework?" The girl asks stopping.

"GET HER!" The Evil Girl Scouts shout and all jump on Hermione sending, bits of hair, robes and cookies flying.

You would think my owner would stop running and help the girl...He didn't. For the first time my master has done the sensible thing: Flee when things get idiotically dangerous. We reached Professor Snape's class with Ron behind us. We quickly sat down as Professor Snape glared at us.

"Fifty point from gryffindor!" he shouted. "Where's Granger?"

"Well," began Harry.

"She's being attacked by Girl Scouts," said Ron.

"I see," said Professor Snape. "The instructions are on the board."

My owner began to copy the instructions but...no, the stupid red head had to press his buttons.

"Aren't you going to help her?" He asked angrily.

"No," he said tonelessly. "If there is one thing that is universal is Girl Scouts and everyone knows you don't mess with Girl Scouts when they attack."

Then in came the bushy haired girl. She had pieces of her robes tangled in her hair. Some cookies remained. She slammed the door behind her and began running in circles with her arms over her head.

"They're coming! They're coming! They're coming!" She screamed and feinted.

Then there was a slashing at the door and a face with a little Girl Scout hat peered through the hole.

"Honey I'm hooome! And you will buy cookies!" The Evil Girl Scout shouted.

Professor Snape screamed like a girl and hid behind a rather small cauldron. I could feel my owner trying to repress a giggle.

"Keep them away from me!" I heard the Professor shout from behind the cauldron.

The Girl Scouts busted down the door and started running towards us. My owner inserted a hand inside my pockets. Well, yes! Brilliant idea, master! The wand? What! Why are you taking that bloody useless stick for?

"Get back!" Harry shouted snapping a Smelting stick at the Girl Scouts who screamed and began to crawl on the floor. "Get back you beasts!"

Harry beat a Girl Scout silly with the Smelting stick. The Girl Scouts screamed and began to crawl backwards towards the exit.

"Back you beasts! Go back to the suburbs!"

The Evil Girl Scouts refused to leave. I saw the red head smile and grab that slimy blond boy from Slytherin. He lifted the boys arms over his head. The Girl Scouts screamed in agony.

"The Stench!" They screamed as they melted. "Noooo! the smell...it's unbearable...it melts us...it melts us...we're melting! We're mel-"

The Evil Girl Scouts had turned into a puddle of green goo. I saw Professor Snape come out from behind the cauldron. He stepped over the unconcious an ignored Hermione and approached cautiously the puddle of green goo.

"Good," he snarled. "1 point for Gryffindor for saving us from the Evil Girl Scouts."

Lavender Brown who was standing next to us gasped and looked at Professor Snape dreamily.

"He gave us points," she whispere clasping her hands. "How sweet and noble of him."

My owner looked at her as if she was crazy and slapped her with Dobby's tea cozy.

"And fifty points for Slytherin for Malfoy's," began Professor Snape keeping his distance from the boy. "For his incredibly disgusting but effective and devastating body odor."

"Isn't he dreamy?" Lavender continued to say.

"Now get out of my face you flithy maggots!" Professor Snape ordered.

My owner bent down and grabbed Hermione by one arm and the boy named Ron Weasley grabbed the other. They dragged her out of the room...pity I couldn't tell them that they had just dragged her over the green goo. Lavender Brown followed us. Harry dropped Hermione and pulled out his wand.

"Ennervate," he said and the girl woke up screaming.

"AAAAHHH! COOKIES! DEATH! DOOM! DESTRUCTION!" Hermione shouted then blinked.

"Harry," said Lavender Brown. "You know Professor Snape better than anyone...can you tell me, what should I buy him to woo him?"

Harry, Hermione, Ron and I even though I have no eyes not to mention eyelids, blinked.

"What?" Harry asked.

"I am in love with Snapey Poo," she said with a smile. "He loves me too...but I have to make him realize it."

"Say what?!" Ron shouted.

"She's gone mad," muttered Hermione getting up from the floor.

"Eeeww!" She said noticing a big green stain on her robe. "What is this?"

"Evil Girl Scout residue," said my owner and then turne to that crazy girl that had just profesed her deep and undying love for Snape.

"What are you talking about? You can't like snape!"

"Why not?"

"He treats us like kneazel feces!"

"That's just his exterior, deep down inside he is a kind, noble and handsome man."

Harry just stared.

"Very very deep deep down inside, beneath the three layers of dirt and five layers of grease...he is a caring and passionate man."

"You're insane Lavender!"

It doesn't all fit in a post so as soon as this is up I'll finish it!!

evlpez · 03-28-2005, 05:45 PM

*waits impatiently, tapping her foot*

Ama · 03-28-2005, 11:40 PM

Ah, yes of course. I'm sorry here comes the rest.

Harry slapped Lavender and ran for it. That night I watched as my owner and his friends though of a plan to make Lavender fall out of love with Professor Snape.Ok, actually the bushy haired girl though of a plan.

"Ok," she said. "Here's the plan."

She pulled out of nowhere a large board game.She opened a bag containing little figures and chose the doggie. She placed the doggie at Go.

"Hermione!" Harry shouted (I say, I would have too) "Monopoly?"

"Shush, hear me out," she instructed. "All we have to do is play Monopoly and make sure we take over Boardwalk and Park Avenue."

"What?" Ron and my owner asked.

"Those are the most expensive ones," said Hermione in annoyed tone. "Fine...we hit her over the head with the Monopoly."

Harry and Ron stared.

"Monopoly has the power to befuddle people so much as to how it ends that they forget everything...and if we're lucky Lavender will forget she ever loved Professor Snape."

"But what if she forgets everything?" Ron asked.

It was Hermione's turn to stare.

"Fine," said Harry. "We must lure her outside."

"What? Now?" Ron asked.

"Yes now!"

So my owner lured Lavender Brown towards the ground during the night. How you might ask? Well, with his beautiful singing voice of course.

"She'll be coming round the mountain when she comes," sang Harry Potter as Lavender Brown skipped behind him.

"Yee Haw!" She yelled punching the air.

"She'll be coming round the mountain when she comes!"

"Yee-" Lavender didn't finish her sentence because Hermione had popped out of nowhere and began whacking her with the Monopoly board.

"AAhhhh!" Lavender yelled running in circles as Hermione chased her ande whacked her over the head continously. "Cut it out!"

Lavender turned around and pulled the board from Hermione's grasp.

"What is wrong with you people?" Lavender yelled and pointing the board at us.

Something stirred in the darkness.

"What was that?" My owner asked.

A smal, squat figure came out of the darkness.Harry stared at it. Ron smiled.

"That's so cuuuute!" Ron squealed.

Hermione stared at him. Ron coughed.

"I mean...what's that?"

"I have no idea," answered Harry.

The figure walked closer and pointed at Harry's scar with a glowing finger.

"Ouuuuch," the thing moaned.

Ok, what is going on? That's what they should be asking instead of wondering what it is. My owner glared at it.

"Ouuuuch," said the thing touching Harry's scar.

Harry slapped its hand away.

"Don't touch me, who are you anyways?"

"Ouuuuuch!" Continued to moan the unidentified thing and placed his finger on my owner's head.

"Stop it!"

"He thinks your hurt Harry," said Hermione laughing.

Lavender stared.

"Whatever. I have no time for your childish antics. I am late for an appoinment with my dear Snapey Poo," she said and begun to leave.

"Ok, Ron!" Harry shouted ignoring the thing touching his forehead and moaning "ouuuuuch". "Plan B."

"Aww, do I have too?" Ron whined but stopped at Hermione's and Harry's glare. "Well,alright."

Ron turned to Lavender and grabbed her by the waist.

"Never fear my..." Ron began tonelessly and looked for Hermione for guidance.

She mouthed the words to him.

"Fair Lady! I have come to sweep you off your feet," finished Ron and kissed Lavender.

Lavender slapped Ron.

"Gross!" She shouted and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand.

"Hey!" Ron shouted. "I look a lot better in that picture in snitchseeker."

"Huh?" Hermione, Harry and Lavender said in unison.

Yes, just one more post to go...

Ama · 03-29-2005, 04:19 PM

"Never mind!" Ron shouted.

Harry shook his head and grabbed the strange thing that kept touching his scar by the hand.

"I don't know what you are but you're bound to get me in trouble so I'm taking you with me," said my owner.

...Honestly, that is the stupidest thing I have ever heard...anyways, so my owner and his friends proceeded to run into the castle. They heard footsteps coming, so what does my owner do? He takes me off and throws me on top of the squashy moaning thing. It was Professor Snape. He stared at us dubiously.

"What are you all up to? And what are you doing out at this time at night?" He drawled.

Then the squashy thing decided to be cute.

"Home! Home! E.T. phone home! E.T. phone home!" It kept shouting and wailing his arms about.

"So that's it's name!" Harry exclaimed. "I mean..."

Snape snarled.

'Who does this belong to?" He asked pointing at E.T.

"It's mine!" Lavender shouted. "I guess I should be punished now."

Everyone stared at her, including Professor Snape.

"Well," said Professor Snape. "I believe so."

"You should do it now," she said.

"What the-!" Harry yelled

Professor Snape snarled.

"You Miss Brown will follow me to my office and," he said reaching for us (E.T. and I you see). "I'm confiscating this."

He began to walk away as he dragged us towards the dungeons. I watched my owner and his two friends stare at us dumbfounded. We reached his office and he put is a corner as Lavender Brown sat down before him. She stared at him dreamily.

"You will serve detention...Miss Brown," he said. "Why are you staring at me like that?"

"I love you Professor Snape!" She exclaimed.

"What?" Professor Snape shouted.

"I know that you act all mean because you're insecure of your own feelings and don't want to get hurt."

"What are you talking about?"

"You're a very caring person deep down inside...not to mention handsome," added Lavender chasing Professor Snape around the room.

"Stop it!"

"It's true! You're greasy hair just adds to the sexyness."

Professor Snape and ran a hand through his hair.

"You don't say?" He remarked contempt.

Lavender nodded. Professor Snape moved closer to her.

"I say Miss Brown, you are very mature for your age..."

No! Sweet Merlin! Don't! Luckily for me E.T. felt the urge to scream out: "OUUUUCH!" and chase Professor Snape all around the room.

"Get away from me!" Professor Snape shouted getting on top of the desk and squealing like a girl.

E.T. then proceeded to run out of the office, up the stairs, out of the castle and away from Hogwarts...and I'll say...that is the best thing that could have happened to me....

The End...

evlpez · 03-30-2005, 10:44 PM

*claps* Bravo. Welcome, officially, to the Evil Elite! Your blood-oath papers are in the mail.

Be sure to include the actual dare requirements at the end of your dares, so everyone knows what was expected of you.

Now go. Dare and be evil.

Ama · 03-31-2005, 12:43 AM

This was the dare that I accepted...

My first dare. *sighs* I feel the evilness. Yay!

babydriver's dare:
* Someone must say, "Who dropped the soap?"
* ET, the extra-terrestial, must put in an appearance
* Lavender Brown finally sees the "inner beauty" of Snape and falls madly in love with him (This cannot be based on a love potion or spell.)
* The story must be told from the viewpoint of an inanimate object
* The following must be used: a Smeltings stick, the Monopoly board game, someone's disgusting body odor, Snitchseeker, a box of Girl Scout cookies

Due Date: April 2

XD....I might accept another dare soon. But now Im going to post a dare so beware! Pwuahahah!

ronnygirl · 03-31-2005, 05:06 AM

hey...can anyone tell me where to get the dares?...i want to do one and i cant figure out where to get one

firebolt_pilot · 03-31-2005, 05:59 AM

So this is where and what the dare is. how clever. You are tooo much! can you do me a favor and let me know if you do another one? THANX! ---Robbie

babydriver27 · 03-31-2005, 02:51 PM

Wow, Amaris! Such great talent! I was impressed with what you did with my dare. Very creative. I hope you do more dares soon and welcome to the Evil Elite.

Ama · 03-31-2005, 04:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ronnygirl

hey...can anyone tell me where to get the dares?...i want to do one and i cant figure out where to get one

Sure. It's in Zonko's. Here is the link! Good luck! Pick a good one!
http://www.snitchseeker.com/vb3/show...46#post1414746

And thank you all for reading. Robbie - sure thing! and babydriver27 - thank you for posting ur dare! it was tons of fun to write.

X-Girl · 05-14-2005, 08:24 AM

LMAO! lAVENDOR is in love w/ Snape??!??! Girls Scouts??!??!?
Well, more goof-ballness in a different form! Ama, any sort of your writing is so good and funny!
Tina
P.s Jan, do you have any ficS?? I've been sorta FF Obcessed these past days!