Oh... I'm sick! Oh... I need lots of love! Please, love me! Here's the first bit. I have to run away now, but I'll be back!

Hermione Granger, for one of the first times in her life, was undecided. It was something little - whether or not to be happy that Viktor was coming back to Hogwarts - but for Hermione, any indecision or unknown was to be feared. In fact, she was much more concerned about the fact that she was concerned than she was actually concerned about anything worth concerning.

The fact of the matter was, Hermione liked Viktor well enough. He was polite, he made her feel like a princess, he had a sexy foreign accent (let's be honest... foreign accents are sexy), and he made Ron act as if he were *laugh* jealous. Sometimes, a girl likes to dream that someone could be jealous of a little masculine attention. She certainly didn't want to date him though. For all his good qualities, he was appallingly boring and couldn't say her name. Plus, there was that whole incident in which he had tried to trick her into dancing the traditional Bulgarian Broom Wedding Dance. As if she wanted to be married before she had at least 3 PhD's!

Added to the fact that Krum just didn't GET it, there was also the fact that he made everyone act a little crazy, whether from fan mania or for other reasons. Harry was slightly normal around him, but Harry was famous too, and he was depressingly normal in just about any situation. As for Ron... best not think about that.

Viktor hadn't even bothered to owl her to let her know he was coming. She had to find out just like everyone else at dinner. And then everyone in the entire hall had looked at her as if they expected her to suddenly burst into song or tears or perhaps both simultaneously. As if she cried in public!

*Hermione pokes the author with her wand.*

Sorry, what?

"A little less drama, a little more plot, please. I'm beginning to make myself sick."

Right. So, Viktor Krum came to Hogwarts. It was similar to the last visit. Girls stalked him in the hallway. Everyone from Flitwick to Dennis Creevey asked him to sign their books, their bags, their quills (which was quite a feat), and their foreheads.

But as everyone stalked Viktor, he stalked Hermione. He followed her from class to class. He sat one table over in the library and Great Hall. He even tried to follow her into the Common Room, but the Fat Lady chewed his ear off for half an hour instead.

Finally, although Hermione was ever so patient and could really stand things for quite a long time, she snapped. In the middle of the corridor, her bag split from the heavy load. Harry and Ron crawled about on the floor, grabbing up quills and remarkably not grousing about being late because of her bag. Ron had been strangely well-behaved the past few days, although his ears did turn that adorable shade of red whenever he saw or heard any mention of "that Quidditch player, you know.... Viktor Krum!"

Hermione looked up to see a hand holding out her Potions text. She murmured a thanks and scrabbled to her feet, only to discover that Viktor had been attached to that hand. He silently moved 4 feet away from her and paused, as if waiting for her to keep moving.

"What are you doing, Viktor?" Hermione yelled. Everyone in the corridor stopped immediately. It was worth being late for class to see the ever-calm Hermione Granger blow her frizzy top. Even the ghosts, who were always hungry for a good bit of gossip (seeing as how they couldn't eat at all... I suppose they're hungry for just about anything), hovered expectantly above the hall.

"I thought we were friends, but you didn't tell me you were coming! And now you're following me about like some sort of bodyguard. What are you doing here?"

Everyone looked around in surprise, because they realized they had never considered what Viktor Krum was doing back at Hogwarts. Even the author was surprised.

"I haf a present for you. I haf been learning English. It is better, no?"

"Better than what?"

"Better than previous. I haf not been ready to gif you da present, but I will soon do so. Hokay?"

Hermione blinked at him a few times. "Ho... I mean okay."

"Did his English sound better to you?" Harry whispered as Krum finally left them in peace.

"Oh, was he speaking English?" Ron snarked, his ears that cute red color. "I didn't even notice."

Hermione stopped in the hallway. "Has anyone seen my wand?" She patted her hair where she often absentmindedly stuck it, then patted down her body. "I can't find my wand." She looked inside her robes.

"Er... Hermione? Could you please stop doing that?" Ron asked.

"Yeah, this fic is rated PG, and Cass is giving us the evil "no-nudity" eye."

She rolled her eyes. "Boys!"