Invisible
Black is the color of which I reside in. Darkness. The cold of eternal deep. But it is not where my heart lies. My heart is in a new state of being. One where beings are considered an all time lowliness. But, for ever time my heart beats, I hear the sounds of tears, dropping into flames and steaming into the night. The sound like a snake. The hiss and the scream of pain and fear. I can’t get it out of my mind. I’m slowly, oh ever so slowly, seeping into madness. Getting lost in myself. I see the rain pour from my soul as everything inside is being washed away. My life crashes toward the earth with an intimidating speed. I fall to the earth and slowly crumble under the weight of everything that haunts me and torments my head. I will myself to stay awake during the day, but my head droops and I fall under the spell of the sun’s exuberant warmth and penetrating light. I am a goddess of the night, a spirit of the dark. Dead to the world of the living and blotted out by what everyone thinks they see. I stand out, but am invisible. I am different, yet I blend in with everyone. I’ve tried to make myself known, only to be humiliated by my own faults. I am called darkness and nightshade. I am labeled different and evil. I am said to be hell spawn, a follower of the devil. I am nothing more than a mere human being that wants to be seen a something more than a child, as something more than a person who is the same as every other person. But I am too small and insignificant in this world, this galaxy, this universe. Everyone is insignificant. But I more than everyone else. The cold envelopes me as thoughts of free falling and blood seep into my brain and stream through my body. I hold my heart in my hands, presenting it to anyone who will pass a glace at me. I can’t seem to see what people stare at when I look in the mirror. Yet what I see is nothing. All there is, is the scene behind me. I am invisible to the world and everything in it. I walk among a sea of living, when inside I am dead and rotting. I am a ghost of what I once was. I am an outline of what I had been. Once alive, now gone with the wind. I cry into a shoulder, only to be pushed away, again. I live in a world where difference is pushed aside yet scorned upon. I only sleep in the day just because I am too cowardly to step out in front of all the people that point and stare at me. I wish to be free of this disease, this sickness. I want to live in peace with myself and the world. But that is impossible, because I am invisible and noticeable, all at the same time. I am invisible to all of the world... |