SPOILER!!: he feels the same!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
astrocat 
"I guess they must have been a little scared when I started to show magic." Although... she only remembered doing accidental magic a few times, and not around her bodyguards, so it was possible that they didn't know until she got her letter. "But the money is good and they were practically my dads by the time I was eleven, so I guess they didn't feel scared enough to leave. Or maybe they pitied me and would have felt terrible if they left me alone. I don't know." Who could say why they still stuck around, despite often being unable to protect her? Who could say why they hadn't just fled her traumatic life and chaotic family situation? Was it love, pity, guilt, or a simple need for the money? Did she want to know? She decided that she didn't.
"My dad runs a tech company. He's rich." Ash said it dismissively. Enough about that, her voice said. Let's talk about something else. He didn't want to know about her father. How he loved her more than her brother. How he hardly loved her at all. How he barely loved anyone since her mom died when she was a baby. How he left his kids alone and never thought to teach her how to be responsible. Evan... didn't want to hear it.
On to more cheerful topics. Ash had a healthy respect for fire. And a not-so-healthy love/hate relationship with fire. "It was my fault I got burned because we had to duel people on our first day and I shouldn't have dueled a sixth year. And Minjae shouldn't have cast incendio on my antlers. And Fake Trent shouldn't have made kids duel. Blame all around, really." Ash could admit her mistakes. People loved that. She was also in the habit of pointing out other people's mistakes. People did NOT love that. Dumb of them, really.
"I think floo involves putting your face in a fireplace... I don't have a fireplace, and I don't really trust floo." It was like, weird teleportation. Ash did not to accidentally end up in the wrong place or have something go wrong. No thanks. Ash would rather draw Cambridge than trust her safety with the floo network. Speaking of...
"I'll draw anyone if they let me. Even if I hate them or they hate me. I'd even draw Nem. there are only three exceptions." Only three people she could. not. STAND. to. paint. Only three. You'd have thought Nem would be on that list, but she tolerated them as long as they never mentioned mirrors to her ever again. They were tolerable. Surprisingly, she accepted their personality, even though she did not like them. Lucien Rosier was an arrogant loser. Cambridge was... well, the less said about that the better. And healer Poppy... Healer Poppy infuriated her. Her personality, her actions, that awful BREAD she kept trying to feed them, the condescending vibes she gave off, her stupid group therapy sessions that Ash was never going to again- Ash hated. all. of. it. Maybe she was an evil spy. Maybe she was just annoying. It made no difference. Ash could not stand her at all. She couldn't even draw her in a place she felt safe. Healer Poppy made her freak out. A lot. Often. Ash would not even draw her in the treehouse. Even the treehouse couldn't save her.
"I think those charms are super safe. I've fallen off many times, no problem." 'fallen.' Ash could say with near-certainty, that he'd be safe if he fell. "I feel safe there too." She even felt emotionally safe there. Not safe enough to draw Healer Poppy though.
He really did wonder what it would be like to witness someone coming into their magic, just for a brief moment. He hadn’t noticed with any of his siblings, Noah having kept it well hidden for years
which he was often still upset about and having already been gone when Lisa and Maya started to show signs. He did pause hearing her mention they wouldn’t want to leave her alone, and he couldn’t help but question that out of curiosity.
“Them being gone would leave you alone? What about your dad? Or any siblings?” Did Ash have siblings? He definitely did not think he’d asked that before, or heard of any younger years with her surname. But then again, if she did, her siblings also didn't necessarily have to be magic as well.
The message was clear in her answer her Dad was not a topic of conversation in which there was much to say, though he couldn’t be sure if that was from homesickness or from bitterness. Or maybe something else entirely that he just didn’t know the name of the emotion. Either way, he decided to respect what was unspoken and not asking anything else along that line. Even if he was curious what type of tech and more about the relationship. It really wasn’t anywhere near his place to pry, and he often at least knew his place.
Even if he sometimes decided to ignore it.
…
”Did you say antlers?” That was first the most important question he could think to ask in that moment. Because.. Well, what? Was there a spell to give her antlers? And had that been voluntary or cast at her?
“I think the blame should fall primarily on Fake!Trent.” Because he was terrible, and he had affected all of their lives in such traumatic ways. Given the fact a lot of their current issues were in fact Trent’s fault, it made sense to him to just pile all blame in every situation on the man. In this particular scenario, he had no love lost on the dead - not when it came to that man.
“It does. Which I guess that also does sound low key terrifying. Because what if it failed somehow?” And instead, they’d just forever marred their faces. There was probably somewhere a fireplace could be found in the castle, but he didn’t feel the need to bring that up when the second point was reason enough to not do it. No way around not having trust, and now that he thought on the suggestion he couldn’t even blame her.
“Do you hate Nemesis?” He didn’t know what to make of the older student himself. And instead he just tried to keep a wide berth because them because he was intimidated. But the Slytherin had not done anything to Evan, not directly. If anyone would have some type of reaction or strong feelings about them, it would be Ash or one of the other students that had been trapped in the mirror.
“Who are the three?” Unless she didn’t want to talk about it, which he would entirely understand if she didn’t feel like sharing that answer. It was a personal matter. And while she seemed content to answer most things, he would respect if there was something she didn’t want to.
“Finding places to feel safe is really important. I’ve been realizing more and more it’s… just here for me.” Here. On this floor, staring up at the stars on the ceiling. There was only a limited few who could get into this room. And that made it more secure than most of the castle. He’d much rather be in here.
“I’m glad you found places that are good for you.” Truly.