Originally Posted by awakemysoul

Benji was at his wit's end trying to find a quiet place just to think. He had a lot to ponder, and it seemed like there were crowds absolutely everywhere. How was an introverted guy supposed to get his solitary thinking time in when there were swarms of people around every corner? It was crucial, especially at a time like this, for him to find a thinking spot, and he was hoping this balcony could suffice for now. It was about the only empty place he could find in the whole school, and boy did he have some thinking to do. Obviously there was the shift in school leadership. That was something to think about in and of itself. However, that shift also brought with it extra baggage to consider:

1. Benji, for the first time EVER, had been told off in Divination because his answer wasn't good enough. In his three years at Hogwarts, though admittedly he was pretty much complete rubbish at Divination, he had never been outright told that his answer was a waste of time and breath. At least he had been trying. But APPARENTLY trying one's hardest is not enough...

2. He had been at Hogwarts since his first year and still practically felt like he had about... uh... zero friends. While this had not posed much of a problem for him in the past -- he liked being alone, after all -- he was beginning to realize now that he was a bit lonely. Alone and lonely are two different things, after all. He may have been introverted, but he wasn't particularly shy, and he did enjoy socializing with a select few people. But all of that select few lived in his neighborhood at home and were decidedly Muggle, so they a) were not here and b) could not know everything that he wished he could talk about. Therefore: for all intents and purposes, friendless.

3. Which led him to this problem: He made it a point to stay on good (or at least neutral) terms with all adults, regardless of how he might actually feel about them on the inside. He never let his negative feelings or opinions show, and he would never (and he meant never) dream of sassing an adult. However, he felt like a jerk for not speaking up for students who were being unjustly punished. (Notice the "unjustly" part -- the kids who were being brats on purpose deserved whatever they got.) He had seen many students get into trouble for things they hadn't meant to do wrong or didn't know were breaking rules, like not greeting the new rude, mean, balding Divination professor, and he felt sorry for them. He was worried because if he said something, that made him a target for punishment himself. But by not saying anything, he worried that other students, who could otherwise be his friends, would resent him for not helping them. He wasn't quite willing to throw himself under the bus, but he was a little concerned that it was making him look bad.

4. ...Actually, it wasn't like anyone knew who he was anyway, so maybe it didn't really matter. See the whole "zero friends" thing. Probably nobody even noticed that he basically just sat back and watch his peers endure ridiculous punishments like pushups. Who mandated exercise for punishment?

5. WHICH REMINDED HIM. He was bitter about S.O.R.E.! Not because of the running itself, but because it ruined his old favorite thinking pastime; before this year, whenever Benji needed some solitary thinking time, he went for a run. He had always been athletic, growing up playing Muggle sports, and he genuinely enjoyed running. But now that he had to run (on somebody else's terms) every morning, it really took the fun out of doing it on his own time later. Hence how he was in this situation of trying to find a thinking spot. This was generally and decidedly NOT FAIR.

Oy vey. He leaned on the balcony railing, looking out across the grounds and pondering these things.