 Audition: she says it's for all the IMPORTANT roles ?? doesn't proofread tweets | #wrongaboutcereal | #siriusly? | emo to the extremo
Zoryn had been waiting for this moment for her ENTIRE life, or well, her ENTIRE Hogwarts career (okay, okay so only the past 3ish years but STILL). She was SO excited that she was practically bouncing out of her shoes. Unfortunately, there was a long line of auditioners and her turn hadn't exactly come up yet. So of course she watched each student walk up and preform their monologue, feeling all the better about her own with each passing performer. She had this IN THE BAG!
When it was FINALLY her turn, Zoryn walked up to the center of the stage, gave everyone a GIANT wave and HUGE grin before suddenly throwing her head down so that her eyes were on her feet. Ahem. It's time.
Lifting her gaze back up towards Myers, she began... "I farted in Yoga class," she sounded only mildly embarrassed to admit it, but there was also a hint of pride behind her voice. "It was LOUD and....I didn't die. Well, okay, my heart started pounding," she nodded. "But it didn't exactly explode. I thought I'd be devastated, but I wasn't." She was pacing around the stage at this point as if she were actually telling the story to Professor M. "Instead," here she stopped pacing. "Something unexpected happened.... I laughed?"
HAHAHAHA. Best monologue choice EVER.
"At first a little giggle and then a FULL BLOWN BELLY LAUGH, like this," clutching onto her stomach the Gryffindor gave a demonstration, "PAHAHAHAA! In fact, I laughed SO hard that I farted again. And again. And AGAIN. Super embarrassing, no? No." So she may have been changing some of the words slightly and the laugh was definitely improvised, but hey! Isn't that a sign of GREAT acting? Zoryn seemed to think so.
"So, I could feel people staring, but I didn't care. Look, I thought I would care, but I felt a lightness, wonder, awe! Who knew I had so much air inside me!?! My body deflated, but my spirit INFLATED!" Zoryn just hoped she was making Justine Janvier proud tbh. "I realized, this was why I'd come to yoga in the first place!" SHE GRINNED. "No, no. Not to fart publicly!" she threw a dismissive hand in the air. "But to fart publicly and SURVIVE it. I know, it's unladylike. But here I was staring fear in the face and realizing... It was just a bunch of hot air!"
Zoryn felt so ALIVE.
"I breathed in deep, SO DEEP, another loud exclamation of my new found freedom erupted from my behind," This was her favorite part. "'Excuse me'," the third year used a very shrill voice here. "The woman behind me said. 'But could you step outside for a moment. SOME of us are trying to practice yoga' this should've DESTROYED ME. But I felt my calm breath and heard myself say: 'Excuse me but I'm practicing my fartnassanas thank you very much," she waited for some laughter from her audience here before continuing forward.
"Then something AMAZING happened. A little noise erupted from another corner of the room. A few others giggled, then laughed, and then more noises erupted. And it was BEAUTIFUL. A symphony of fartnassanas. I was free, they were FREE!"
AND SCENE.
The Gryffindor ended the scene with her hands in the air as a demonstration of the FART FREEDOM! After a few seconds passed, she lowered her arms and BOWED sending regal waves and kisses to all of her fans seated in the audience (aka Myers). Once again she made sure to let him know how she wanted ALL the lead roles. And then with that, the Gryffindor made her way off the stage for the next person in line.
Nailed it.
ooc: From the play Yoga Fart, some parts taken out for length
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