Kurumi felt her breath escape her when she felt his hand enclose around hers. She didn't flinch, but a shy gasp escaped her pink lips and she turned to look over her shoulder at him. A gentle breeze rustled the trees and the ribbon holding her hair in place came loose, sending her hair cascading down and over her shoulders like a waterfall of black silk.

She couldn't be sure, but she thought that she saw his cheeks turn a shade of pink, but it was hard to tell with the make up on his face. She stared at him as he spoke with unblinking eyes and felt the chain around her neck holding Adam's gift grow heavier and heavier. Looking at his hand and squeezing it gently, she looked back at him before she spoke.

"Connor...I-I know..." she began before stopping herself. She did know. He had made it very clear of his feelings and intention when they had had lunch together the day before she had headed back to Japan. "But...you need to understand what I have been through and that the events life throws us effect us all in different ways. Until I came to Hogwarts, I had grown up totally alone. Not even my mother, to this day, will look me in the eye because she is afraid of what I am. I-I finally found someone I felt safe around. Someone who I could confide in and...in a sense...allowed to take over who I was." She squeezed Connor's hand tightly as a way to stop her tears from flowing again. "I-I've never been given the chance to see who I am. What I can do...I need to be able to do that right now..." She turned her eyes towards the ground and felt the knot in her stomach grow and tighten. She knew what she needed to say, what the fear lying beneath all the layers of self doubt was.

Taking another deep breath, Kurumi turned her gaze back to his, took a step forward, and rested her hand on his chest directly over his heart. "There is a hole in my heart right now that is so big that an army of Hippogriffs could probably march right through it. When you showed up..." the sudden puff of vanilla and cinnomon nearly threated her to lose control in her weakened state, but she fought it off. She was sure that her face had contorted as she concentrated on not allowing his Veela influences to take over. "...when you showed up...part of me just wanted to let go and allow you to make me forget everything...But...I can't allow that to happen. It would only hurt you more..." She tilted her head down for just a moment. "You deserve more than that...and so do I...." She paused. "I shouldn't want to go to anyone because they will dull a pain, a temporary pain that I will be able to heal myself. I...I made a decision today...after reading that letter," she said feeling the contents of her robe's pocket.

"I-I-I haven't been running away to hurt you, Connor," she said after a few more moments. "...and...and...I'm really sorry that I have..." She squeaked softly as a few stray tears streamed down her already flushed cheeks. "If...if it's too much...and you feel you would be happier removing yourself from the situation," she said slowly squeezing his hand once more. "I-I-I will understand...just know that I am acting the way I am...so that I do not use you. I am wanting to do what is healthy for me..." for the potential us...