Doxy
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 6,150
Hogwarts RPG Name: Amur Neverwinter Fourth Year | ~ Rise and Rise Again, Until Lambs become Lions ~ Quote:
Originally Posted by grangerfan8 "...You didn't even try," her head hung low as she gave it a small shake, still keeping him out of her line of vision. "You could have tried to make it work before just giving him away...could've tried to find a place that would allow you to keep him or something." Her voice was strained and held more pain than she wished to show.
A small part of her knew that he wasn't giving up on Merlin, that he was doing what he thought best for the feline he loved dearly. But a bigger part of her couldn't help but feel like he WAS giving up on Merlin, all because he didn't fit into his new life. And if he wasn't willing to fight for Merlin, if he was capable of tossing aside the creature that had been by his side for the past four terms, then what else would he let go of? WHO else would he cut from his new life? "And you didn't have to give Merlin to her." Frustrated, she blinked back unshed tears. Merlin belonging to Lexi now bothered her more than she was willing to admit to him or herself, and she was too distracted by other thoughts to even put much thought into it. "I don't want to see Merlin running around the castle." Not without him she didn't. "I have enough things to remind me of your absence next term, I don't need another one." Certainly not one she cared for almost as much as she cared for him. Sabel sort of just stared at her. Agony and anger welled up in his gut, spreading like wildfire throughout his entire being. He couldn't move or speak for a good few minutes, numbed completely by the pain. When he finally found the strength, he untangled himself from Arya and slipped off the windowsill, walking a few feet away before stopping.
Running his hand back through his hair, he let out a slow, shaky breath. The last thing he wanted to do was fight with Arya. The last thing he ever wanted to do was to hurt her, in any way. But here he was, hurting her, and here she was, killing him.
Slowly, he turned back around to face her, his expression a mixture of extreme pain and anger. "I would have thought, seeing something of me, to remind you of me, would bring some sort of comfort. Some sort of happiness. You would rather I disappear off the face of the earth? That I leave you or Lexi nothing to be remembered by? Would that be easier, Arya? If seeing one of the things I care about most is so painful to you, is so painful a memory, why keep anything from me? Why even look at me now? Even more, if you are afraid of reminders, how are you going to look at the thing I care about most? How are you going to look at yourself?"
He could feel the tears running down his cheeks, burning them with the hot pain of the situation. "I am trying so damn hard to be strong for you. To be strong for Lexi. Hell, to even do the right thing for my own cat, for a creature I would consider akin to my brother. And all you can do is hit me down for it. All you can throw at me is jealousy and loathing. Do you not understand how bloody hard this is for me!?"
Bitting his bottom lip, he shook his head. He could feel his hands trembling furiously with the nerves, his voice quivering with the strain of fear. "If you didn't want memories Arya, if you don't want to see things to remember me by, then why? Why did you let this go on so long? Why didn't you just say so?" More tears fell from his cheeks as he stared at her helplessly, feeling as if his whole world was breaking again. "Why did you even say yes to me? I would have let you go, because I love you."
A hard swallow had his voice drop to nothing more than an agonized whisper. He felt like he was going to vomit. Like he would collapse at any given moment his body trembled so much. "You didn't have to say yes."
__________________ I've got a fire for a heart._________________________________________________
I'm not scared of the dark._________________________________________  _______________________________________You've never seen it look so easy.
Last edited by Tazenhani; 04-02-2011 at 04:24 PM.
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