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Term Fifty-One: Don't Feed The Furries

House Point Totals
Ravenclaw 2019
Gryffindor 1047
Slytherin 801
Hufflepuff 629

Plot summary by sweetpinkpixie

Out with the old and in with the new. Even Diagon Alley seemed to be in the mood to celebrate with the return of the Worple and Warmsley Magical Travelling Carnival. Newly appointed headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Malachi Trent, sent the house elves into the Alley to collect supplies and replenish the storerooms of the castle as the new caretakers...save for one. Toddles, the youngest of the elves and adopted by Nimma back in 2075, could not quite keep his duties straight and spent his initial galleons in the Magical Menagerie on a hamster and the finest of cages for it. His itch for a pet only slightly scratched, Toddles became further distracted from his duties in seeking a companion for Cheeksies the hamster when he happened upon the mysterious Tattooed Man. In possession of a small adorable and pleasantly pink creature, the Tattooed Man was all too willing to sell the creature to Toddles as it was spooking all the other creatures of the carnival. The instructions were simple: keep the creature in its cage and do not under any circumstances ever feed it.

If only Toddles had listened.

Diligent in his care of his new pets, to the detriment of the Hogwarts budget, Toddles had ignored the man’s warning and taken the creature (affectionately called Fluffsies) out of its cage for some cuddles. That was all it took. Fluffsies escaped and made its way up to the Great Hall where it began making contact with students and wooing them with its big endearing gaze. In a panic, Toddles began scouring the Great Hall for his precious Fluffsies and entirely disrupted students who sat at their house tables. Both Fluffsies and Toddles never reunited this night, but Fluffsies did find affectionate caresses from Chloe Kettleburn, Charlie Smedley, Matthew Flory, and Sterling Calrissian before disappearing from the feast entirely.

Classes began, quidditch trials were underway, and runaway Fluffsies was turning Hogwarts into its own personal playground and never staying in one place for too long and consuming souvenirs along the way. Literally. Phials from the potions storeroom, brushes from the art classroom, books from the library, robes belonging to Professor Wishart, a care package from home for the headmaster, and the most heinous of them all...toilet paper from the boy’s loo. A bottomless stomach is not the only thing Fluffsies came equipped with either. Unbeknownst to all, each time Fluffsies ate, Fluffsies multiplied. Each time one of these Fluffsies duplicated ate...it too multiplied! Meanwhile, those who had come in contact with the little pink creature contracted a curious itch and subtle increases in hair growth and thickness.

Fluffsies and all the Fluffsies Jrs. continued to wreak havoc on the castle and among the casualties of their appetites were the hour glasses and all the house gems, the pear portrait one needed to tickle to enter the kitchens, and even Cheeksies the hamster. More students came in contact with the creature(s) - Torii Stark, Mark Gunter, Harri Ainsworth, Patrick Dooley, and Derfael Ashbyrry-Hawthorne - and began showing symptoms of itching while those who had come in contact previously were showing more dramatic changes...and embarrassing hair growth that had nothing to do with puberty.

While textbooks, telescopes, bulletin boards, and suits of armour disappearing was a bit of a nuisance and perplexing to the Hogwarts residents it was not the worst of things. The discovery of the disappearance of Ambrosia the abraxan by the Head Girl and Head Boy, however, was and it would later be concluded that one of these pink fluffy creatures was to blame. Even more students (Trinetta Gladin and Stella Starson) came in contact with the creatures and the symptoms of those before escalating even further - sprouting patches of thick hair all over their bodies, itching as though they had been dosed in itching powder, and gnawing on things that ought not to be gnawed on. Eventually a horde of Fluffsies took up residence in Professor Dolly Dopple’s office due to her feeding them out of the goodness of her heart. The ever well intended Professor Dopple would find her charming personality to be her undoing, however, as one of the creatures took a bit too much of a liking to her and swallowed her up whole.

An emergency meeting was then called by the headmaster in the courtyard for all. Even Toddles made his appearance, hollering about his beloved Fluffsies and believing that this meeting was called because his Fluffsies had finally been found. Emotions high, tension rose between Professors Alice O'Hara and Tristan Wayland when the History of Magic professor proclaimed that the mutants must all be exterminated and Toddles receive capital punishment for his ignorant involvement. In the peak of the confrontations, Dolly Dopple herself appeared in her new spectral form...and completely oblivious to the fact that she was, in fact, a ghost. Headmaster Trent swiftly dealt with the bickering professors and instructed that all return to their common rooms to seek out any of the pink creatures that may be hiding there. The final goal to be to gather all the creatures together and safely remove them from the castle. With some vital information shared from a blubbering Toddles, the headmaster sent word to Charles Hollingberry, the Minister for Magic, for assistance in dealing with the growing horde and danger at the school.

Under the Minister’s instruction, the Department for the Control and Regulation of Magical Creatures and the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes, lead by department heads James Draper and Eliora Dodderidge, arrived with a small team to assist with the search and ‘rescue’ of all the pink fluffy creatures from the castle...but not until after the house tables too had fallen victim to the horde of pink. Meanwhile, back in the Ministry, the Department of Mysteries teamed up with the PART unit from Accidents and Catastrophes to analyze DNA samples provided by all those infected students (as collected by the headmaster in his office after the emergency meeting) to find a cure to reverse the effects from touching the creatures. All creatures accounted for and clean up in progress (along with replacing those items that had previously been eaten by all the Fluffsies), Hogwarts managed to survive the pinkocalypse mostly unscathed.

Sorry, Dopple.


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