One day in the middle of the woods, Noddy managed to ring Big ears on the telepho -

There was a young man fron Brazil,
Whose name, I think, was Bill.
He could screw on his head
While he was in bed,
And still have time for his Pills! Wait- someday the author will get it right -
Ah, yes, the weird on. O. Won. whatever.

Anyway, Harry and his hmm...(Neville disguise?)friend Neville dressed like a weirdo from Hogwarts!!! walked out. Ron was slithering out of his suit until Hermione suddenly died. (Go on! You know you want to!) and hippo angels playing bust saxophones came flying down trying to play Cb (Which actually is B! mwahahaha! Should I call this book Harry Potter and the Rampaging Hippos?).
Until Ron heroically (and did i mention Bleurgh!ly?) said, "Oh, Hermione! I've always treasured the moments even when you were breathing, so I don't what I would do good snog, but anyway, I LURV YOU!"
"Oh, right, that's good enough excuse not to be dead!" she said and she jumped off her hippo, "They were bad serenaders anyways."
"I can't believe I said that."
"C'mere you hunk of Ginger blob!"
This bit blanked out for the X-rated swearing and violence. I know you want to read this bit but - hey don't pokey! It's ended now anyway.
And Ron cried out as Hermione was being carried away by the hippos, "Oh, Author, I'm bored of this!"
"Rum do" said Seamus poking his head through the doors
And the author ended it.